


Now that you are here

by Lunayfirefly



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Complicated Relationships, Day At The Beach, Developing Relationship, Difficult Decisions, Drama & Romance, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Established Relationship, Eventual Romance, Family Issues, First Kiss, First Meetings, Friendship, Friendship/Love, M/M, Memories, Musicians, Past Relationship(s)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-23
Updated: 2019-10-31
Packaged: 2020-10-27 00:47:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 31
Words: 50,634
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20751545
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lunayfirefly/pseuds/Lunayfirefly
Summary: When we were teenagersWhen everything seemed simplerWhen the sound of the waves mixed with the musicWhen we first saw each otherIt has been way too longBut now that you are here…When we are olderWhen our realities are crashingWhen we want to shut up the thoughts that are turning us crazyWhen our hearts race just because we see each otherThings are not going to be easyBut now that you are here…





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> The chapters will start with Seungcheol's POV and then Jihoon's POV 
> 
> (This story is cross-posted in Asianfanfics by Ttiyfb)

Seungcheol sighed as he looked up to the sky. It had been more than ten years, but every time he thought about it, the pain was still there. For others Busan was a great touristic spot, but for Seungcheol was the last place he saw his mother alive. She had been sick for a long time and she wanted to return to her hometown before her condition turned worse, but it was already too late and after a couple of months in Busan she was gone. 

His grandmother had always insisted him to visit her, but he couldn’t. Her house was full of happy memories that turned sad faster than he expected. But now that he was in Busan for an advertising project, he had no excuse to refuse her invitation. She had even convinced him to stay with her instead of a hotel and Seungcheol had been nervous all the way from Seoul. 

The door of his grandmother’s house opened suddenly and he was startled for a moment when he received a tight hug. 

“Cheollie, welcome home.” She said sweetly and Seungcheol’s eyes started watering. 

His mother used to say the same thing to him every time he returned from school.

He returned the hug trying to keep his emotions at bay, while his grandmother kept talking about how she had prepared his favorite dish for dinner.

He followed her inside after a moment and when he arrived to his designated room another sigh escaped his lips. It was the same room he had occupied the last time he visited and the memories came back in such a rush that he had to sit down.

The shock probably showed on his face so his grandmother gave him another hug.

The years after his mother’s death Seungcheol knew he had received more privileges than others due to his father’s success in the business field, but he hadn’t receive a hug that could warm his heart.

His father was really busy even before his mother was gone, but after it he focused all his frustration into work, leaving Seungcheol all alone in a big apartment in Seoul. 

And maybe he got used to that coping mechanism too, as he followed his father’s instructions and worked hard to enter a new school for richer people, because he couldn’t keep up with the pity looks he received.

In there he met Jeonghan, the heir of one of the largest hotel chains in Korea. They didn’t have much in common, but as soon as he mentioned the name to his father, he was instructed to befriend him. It wasn’t that hard as Jeonghan seemed to have taken a like on him.

But Seungcheol wouldn’t have imagined twelve years after that, they would be engaged. He knew he should be more excited about it, and he couldn’t help but feel guilty about his lack of enthusiasm, but he wondered if his mother would approve the other or at least help him sort out his feelings.

His thoughts were interrupted when his grandmother called him for dinner; she wanted to know all about Seungcheol’s project in Busan and how he had been doing. He answered politely to all her questions, trying to focus on her instead of the memories of her mother sitting at the same dinner table or his mother cooking in the kitchen. And when they finished dinner and he excused himself to his room all he could think was that it would be a long week in Busan.  
******************************************************************************************************************************************

Jihoon walked around the train station when he heard his name being called. His mother was waving her arms excitedly as she smiled at him. It had been a few years since he last saw her so he smiled back with the same intensity. His schedule back in Japan had turned crazy as soon as his songs became a hit and he spent more time at the studio than at his apartment. 

When they arrived at his childhood home Jihoon felt nostalgic. It had been more than a decade since he left Busan, but his parents had left all his things in his room like waiting for him to come back. After years in Japan he wasn’t sure if he would ever return to Korea, but his success had been noticed and a new blooming company had hired him to work as a producer. It was a great working opportunity and maybe in this way he could get closer to Mingyu again. The other male’s model career had grown so much that he was hired by a Korean company a year ago and with their clashing schedules they barely talked.

Jihoon had decided to spend a couple of weeks in Busan before moving to Seoul with Mingyu and starting his new life. He wanted these weeks to be a healing time where he could keep a distance from the stress at work and just enjoy time with his parents and maybe spend some time at the beach; something he haven’t done in years, as he spent his free days laying on his bed watching series. 

After dinner with his parents he returned to his room and called Mingyu. The other talked excitedly about his new photoshoot and how he was invited to party, but Jihoon was more focused on the pictures and posters on his walls. They were all music related and he snickered when he saw a picture of him and Soonyoung. Before he left to Japan, the other had made him promise that one day they would work with a big artist and he was the one that got him his new job in Korea.

“Jihoon?” He blinked before paying attention to the other’s voice on the phone.

“Sorry what?” He asked with some guilt on his voice.

“You must come to the party with me. The other models keep joking that I have an imaginary boyfriend.”

Jihoon sighed. He didn’t like those kind of parties, dressing up was annoying and he always felt overwhelmed when he was surrounded by such beautiful people. But he had to agree, Mingyu had left him out of the hook many times in Japan and he had no other excuse to refuse.

After catching up a bit more, Jihoon started unpacking and when he opened his last drawer he found an old notebook. It was similar to the ones he used to use to write his lyrics back in high school, but when he opened it the pages seemed to be empty. He was about to close it when a folded paper fell down.

He got intrigued and when he opened it, in a messy handwriting that he was sure belonged to Soonyoung, there was written a few sentences.

Things to do before moving to Japan:  
1\. Win the school annual music festival (WITH ME)  
2\. Go to the beach festival (WITH ME)  
3\. Get your first kiss (NOT FROM ME)

Jihoon started laughing, because as annoying as Soonyoung could be, he also made him laugh like no other person could. And when he kept reading the paper he noticed his own handwriting.

1\. O  
2\. O  
3\. Seungcheol


	2. Chapter 2

The sound of an incoming call woke up Seungcheol, he opened his eyes slowly and looked around the room. He had barely slept last night; he had stayed hours staring at the ceiling and remembering how his life was before his mother passed away. Another ring from the phone brought his attention back and he answered with a sleepy voice.

“Mr. Choi Seungcheol?” The caller asked with a confused voice.

Seungcheol stared at his phone for a moment before checking the time and he groaned when he realized he was late for his meeting. He apologized before confirming that he was on his way and as soon as he cut the call he ran to the bathroom. His grandmother gave him an amused expression as he appeared in the living room with his half dried hair and his crooked tie. 

“I thought that at your age you would wake up early on your own.”

He gave her a sheepish smile before running to the door with his briefcase in one hand and a French toast in the other. As he drove his car through the city, he felt the need to open the window. The air felt so different from Seoul, the smell of the sea and the clear sky made everything feel cinematic.

He was coordinating the advertising campaign for a restaurant chain that had already opened in different cities of Korea and now was investing in Busan. His initial plan was to stay one week and then return to the capital to help Jeonghan organize the opening party of the new hotel, but the other was going to stay in Jeju longer than expected. So Seungcheol was debating if he should stay another week with his grandmother. It had been years since they saw each other for more than a few hours and he felt bad to leave her so soon when she lived alone and was expecting his arrival for so long. 

“Tomorrow the photographer and the models will be ready at 9 am for the photoshoot” He announced to his client after confirming the information with his assistant Wonwoo.

He had lunch with his client before leaving the restaurant and as soon as he sat on his car he checked the messages he had received. Jeonghan was asking if he was okay and to call him as soon as he was free. His father sent him a lot of work related information that he should confirm by email. Chan had sent him lots of messages and the last one said “I called grandma to find out if you were alive cause you didn’t answer”. Seungcheol smiled at that and answered the message with lots of emojis.

Chan was his step brother, but Seungcheol never introduced him to others like that. For him Chan was his younger brother, and nobody could say otherwise. His father had remarried five years after his mother’s death and his father’s new wife already had an eight years old son. Chan had lost his father in a car accident so Seungcheol felt the need to protect the younger. That was why it annoyed him the pressure his own father put on the other and how he didn’t support Chan’s dream to become a dancer. 

He decided to call Jeonghan and he wasn’t surprised when the other started talking about work and how he couldn’t believe the mess that was happening in his Jeju hotel when he should be focused on the inaugural party in Seoul. He insisted Seungcheol to check with Wonwoo how the advertising plan for the party was going. Seungcheol patiently calmed the other down and told him he would update him as soon as he received the information. Maybe he should return to Seoul at the end of the week afterall.  
******************************************************************************************************************************************

Before leaving to Seoul, Mingyu had given him a camera as a gift. The other had been modeling in China for a couple of months when he met Minghao and he became friends with the photographer. Since then Mingyu had been interested in being behind the camera as well as being in front of it. Jihoon hadn’t have time to check the camera, but now he had two entire weeks to put his amateur skills in practice. 

He had accompanied his mother to his old school where she taught music as well as the after school music academy. It was not wonder from where he got his love and skills for music. He had taken pictures of any interesting place he saw and some students even tried to pose for the camera. It was fun to walk around the hallways he had been when he was younger. Many memories appeared in his mind as he walked through the market and the park near his house. 

Mingyu had sent him a message to confirm the date of the party along with a picture of him with other models smiling. He sent a smile emoji before enjoying the snacks he had bought. He didn’t want to think about the party, but he couldn’t help but notice that Mingyu looked even better with his new hairstyle. And Jihoon had to admit he missed the other more than he cared to show in front of his mother.

They had met as university freshmen when they became roommates. Both of them were on a scholarship so they were very supportive when it came to their studies and forcing the other to rest if they looked near to faint. Jihoon worked part-time at the library and Mingyu modeled for barely known brands.

They had been there for each other through all their university years, when Mingyu got frustrated with acting and wanted to quit, when Jihoon got scammed to work in a music company, when Mingyu got his first big modeling campaign and when Jihoon’s song got accepted by a rookie artist. 

After university they had moved together just as friends, but as the weeks and the months passed, the smiles and the hugs turned into kisses and more. And Jihoon got used to wake up in Mingyu’s arms. He wished things had stayed that way, but even before Mingyu had moved to Korea, they had been too busy to sync their schedules and it was a miracle if they could spend a day together.

Maybe that was why all his last songs were about longing and remembering happy moments. And that thought made him remember about the paper he had found last night.

3.Seungcheol

That was all the paper said and Jihoon bit his lip trying to stop his smile.

There were only three things he remembered about the other after all these years.

He had puppy eyes that widened when Jihoon kissed his plump lips barely keeping his balance as he stood on his tiptoes to reach Seungcheol’s face.


	3. Chapter 3

Seungcheol’s opinion on Jeonghan had changed through the years. When they first met back in high school, the other looked like a mischievous teenager that used his father’s power to get his way out punishment after pulling pranks on other students and teachers. But as he spent more time with the other, Seungcheol realized that Jeonghan did that to keep up with the pressure of being the heir of his father’s company. 

At that time Seungcheol wasn’t fully aware of what implied being surrounded by rich kids or why was his father so interested in him befriending Jeonghan, but he treated the other like he would do with his friends back in his hometown Daegu.

And that seemed to do the trick and Jeonghan started expressing his emotions more and more instead of pulling dangerous pranks, even when sometimes he did prank Seungcheol. Jeonghan’s mother took a liking of him after that and without realizing, Seungcheol end up being Jeonghan’s date for the following hotel parties.

His father seemed really happy about it, but Seungcheol felt used when he found out his father was working in an advertising campaign for the Yoon’s new hotel. Jeonghan didn’t seem shocked; he even admitted suggesting his father’s advertising company as an option. He said that he did the same with his other friends because they would end up being business partners at some point. 

That moment was decisive for Seungcheol as he started looking at everyone on a different light. How the friendships he saw on his school were not the same as the ones he had in Daegu and that the only person who was honest with him and didn’t let the others bully him for being naive was Jeonghan.

Their friendship grew with the years and sometimes Seungcheol wished he was naive enough to not notice Jeonghan’s favoritism for certain people depending on their family background. Or how he would keep a façade in front of others and didn’t let his emotions show, calculating everything like in a business meeting.

Because the Jeonghan he always wanted to see was the one that only appeared when they were alone. He was still mischievous and still loved to pull pranks on Seungcheol. His laugh was precious considering how much stress the other had and the way Jeonghan had accepted Chan made Seungcheol hold the other even closer to his heart.

But things changed unexpectedly when they got drunk in one of their university parties and woke up naked together. Jeonghan was always direct when he talked; he said he didn’t have time for misunderstandings. So, Jeonghan made it clear that it was a drunken mistake and that they should move on and not let it affect their friendship. 

Seungcheol had accepted, as he did most of the time when Jeonghan said something, but after that he couldn’t help but admire Jeonghan more often or some of the blurred memories of that night appeared in his mind. The other was the closest friend Seungcheol had so he didn’t want to risk it by confessing those thoughts, but the day after their university graduation Jeonghan appeared at his house and kissed the life out of him. And they had been together since then.  
**************************************************************************************************************************************

Jihoon remembered the first time he saw Soonyoung in Japan. The other had traveled there because of a competition along with his dance crew, and he jumped to hug Jihoon as soon as he saw him. That was the first time he saw Mingyu being jealous. They had been living together for almost two years after graduation, but still haven’t defined their relationship with a word. Mingyu was polite to Soonyoung, but Jihoon could see the annoyance in his expression and how his eyes followed Soonyoung’s hands as soon as they touched Jihoon. 

It was quite funny for him, because apart from Mingyu he didn’t like other people touching him. But even if he had told him that for years back in Busan, Soonyoung didn’t care and hugged him every time he could. So in order to change Mingyu’s kicked puppy face, he cleared his throat and introduced him as his boyfriend. He listened to the other two cheer and he was suddenly sandwiched between the two males that tried to hug him.

And things started changing after that. Mingyu started holding his hand and kissing him in public, and it felt nice. His favorite thing was when Mingyu would give him a piggy back ride on their way to their apartment. He would cook and clean for him, so Jihoon was more than happy to reward him inside the bedroom.


	4. Chapter 4

It had been a busy week for Seungcheol, but with Wonwoo already confirming the publicity on tv, radio and social networks, he felt like he could finally relax. His grandmother had been very patient with him talking on the phone during dinner or late at night, but he had to make sure the project was successful as it was for a very important client. 

His father was still trying to put him in a higher position, but he preferred to be in the field than sitting in a desk reading reports. But that didn’t stop the older man, and Seungcheol was in copy of many important emails that he had to check before the monthly board meeting.

That was the reason he had finally decided he needed a break and would be staying in Busan for another week. He had barely spent time with his grandmother and during the weekend there would be a beach festival he was interesting on going. 

The last time he was in Busan, the beach festival was his last happy memory. It was his first time there, but his cousins had already visited a few times and convinced him to go. He was only 16 by then and his mother gave him permission just by looking at his puppy eyes. 

Back then, he was really excited about the idea of the beach, ice cream and famous music bands distracting him from his worries. He had played beach volleyball, swam in the sea and laughed louder than he remembered in the past months.

He was enjoying his day when he suddenly realized he had lost his cousins. He looked around and saw families and groups of friends, but not even one familiar face. Seungcheol nor his cousins had a cellphone at that time, so he was debating with the idea of asking the police for help to return home. But his internal struggle was interrupted when he heard two loud laughs. He looked around and saw two guys around his age laughing and pushing each other in a friendly manner. Seungcheol wouldn’t have paid any more attention if the shorter one hadn’t turned to look at him. 

Their gazes got locked for a moment, but even when the other turned around Seungcheol couldn’t stop looking at him. His jet black hair, which contrasted with his pale skin, moved slowly with the sea breeze; and his smiling face glowed with the setting sun in the background.

The two guys started walking towards one of the ice cream stands and Seungcheol followed them feeling entranced by the shorter male. The other probably felt his intense stare and turned to look over his shoulder for a moment before he returned to his conversation with the other guy.

Seungcheol was a friendly guy, but he was never good at flirting, he stuttered and made a fool of himself. So he decided to keep his distance and wondered if he could stay just long enough to hear the other’s melodious laugh once again.

But his thoughts were suddenly interrupted when he heard a shout.

“Jihoonie fighting!” 

And all of a sudden, he saw the male addressed as Jihoonie walking towards him with a determined look on his face.

It happened so fast that all he could do was open his eyes wide before he saw the other male’s shy smile as he stood on the soles of his feet again. Seungcheol raised a hand to touch his lips, not believing his first kiss was stolen just like that. He still could feel the soft lips against his own and his heart racing in excitement.

The sun had already set and now Jihoon was shining under the lights of the festival, angelic as the first time Seungcheol had laid his eyes on him.He wanted to say something and he was about to, when he felt a hand pulling his shoulder to turn him around and the face of his cousin appeared in front of him.

“Seungcheol we missed dinner, our moms are gonna kill us.” He said rapidly before pulling Seungcheol by the arm farther and farther away from Jihoon.

And when he turned around to look for the other, he realized he had lost him in the middle of the crowd that was now admiring the fireworks in the night sky.  
*************************************************************************************************************************************

Jihoon wasn’t expecting such a strike of inspiration by being in Busan, but just in the first week there he had started five songs and used his mother piano to play the melodies that couldn’t stop appearing in his mind. Maybe it was his late night walks by the beach or spending time with his family, but he felt really carefree.

Or maybe it was the endless conversations he had with Soonyoung after he sent the other the picture of the paper with “Things to do before moving to Japan”. It brought great memories of their teenage years and that beach festival where Jihoon gave his first kiss to a stranger.  
Soonyoung had helped him remember many more things about that day. How his friend had told him he would probably dye his hair orange as soon as he arrived to Japan and just by imagining it they had started laughing. He had actually tried brown and red, but settled for blond for the last few years. 

He could also remember how he turned around to look behind his shoulder and saw Seungcheol looking at him and how his friend had noticed that too. He would have never accepted if he wasn’t sure he was moving to Japan, but when Soonyoung dared him to fulfill all the things on their list, he accepted. What he wasn’t expecting was receiving such cheer from his friend, though embarrassing, it also gave him the boost to approach the taller guy and kiss him out of the blue.

But then he realized he hadn’t thought about what he was going to do after the kiss. He just looked up at the other with a shy smile deciding if he should run away or say something. But before he could do something, someone turned the other around and started pulling him away. And the only thing Jihoon got to hear was his name. The pair got lost in the sea of people and when the first firework exploded Jihoon jumped scared.

“Imagine if you could meet him again.” That was Soonyoung last message and Jihoon couldn’t deny the fluttery feeling inside his chest. 

Somehow that kiss scene felt like a teenage movie that Jihoon deemed incomplete. An almost forgotten memory that became more alive at the prospect of going to the Busan beach festival the next weekend. But his thoughts were suddenly interrupted when his phone started ringing and Mingyu’s name appeared as the caller.


	5. Chapter 5

Seungcheol had enjoyed his last week in Busan. Even when his email inbox was flooded with messages and Jeonghan kept asking about the party advertisement plan, he had time to go around the city with his grandmother and to meet her neighbors to whom she proudly introduced him as her grandchild. Just Seungcheol, not Mr. Choi or the heir of Choi Company, just him. Just Seungcheol in a t-shirt, shorts and sandals. With the sea breeze around him and an ice cream cone in his hand. He felt more alive than in any part of Seoul. 

He had eaten lunch with his grandmother and then walked all the way to the beach festival. Unlike the last time he had visited, a DJ was playing electronic music, the small food stands had turned into restaurants and many foreigners were taking pictures. But the festival had kept his spirit and the never ending sea was the main character. 

He had watched kids playing beach volleyball and swimming in the sea and that brought him happy memories. He had been trying to keep his thoughts positive after he confessed to his grandmother all the pain that brought him staying at her house and have mourned once again the death of his mother. 

Seungcheol wanted to enjoy these new memories and even when he had to return to Seoul early the next day, this time he wanted to stay for the fireworks. The sun was starting to set and the sky showed a mix of colors that he wanted to keep in his memory or at least in a picture in his cellphone.

Seungcheol was trying to take a better shot by walking a bit closer to the seashore when he saw him. It had been more than a decade, but he knew he wasn’t mistaken. He would never forget that angelic face. The other had just turned around after taking pictures with his camera and when he noticed Seungcheol, his neutral face changed into one of surprise. Seungcheol was sure the other had recognized him too, so he couldn’t help but grin when he saw the other’s shy smile. 

Seungcheol wasn’t sure what the feeling inside his chest was, but he started chuckling making the other react in the same way. It was kind of silly seeing two adults acting that way without approaching each other, so this time he took the first step.

The other probably wasn’t expecting that as he took a step back a smile no longer on his face.

“Jihoon-ssi?” He asked carefully just to make sure of the name he had heard so long ago. 

The other just looked up at him and gave him a nod without saying anything further.

The music kept playing in the background and Seungcheol couldn’t help but notice how just like the first time the sun made Jihoon’s skin glow and the wind caressed his hair softly.

“You are blond now.” He said, and suddenly felt like the teenager that used to make a fool of himself when he was in this kind of situations.  
The other snorted, proving Seungcheol just how out of the game he was.

He cleared his throat trying to sound more confident. “I am Seung-“

“Seungcheol. I heard it last time.”

Seungcheol. Just Seungcheol. That thought made him grin again.

The festival was so alive with people, food and music, but they just stared at each other in silence.

It was like they were trying to memorize each other or maybe trying to remember how they were the first time they saw each other.  
There were not exchanged words that time, but this time Seungcheol didn’t want to leave it like that.

“Can I ask you something?” 

His question was answered with a small nod.

“Why did you kiss me?”   
**********************************************************************************************************************************

“So I lost my first kiss because of a dare?” 

Jihoon was amused at all of this. What were the chances of meeting Seungcheol after all these years and explaining that he had kissed him because Soonyoung dared him to fulfill the list. And just to find out that he also stole Seungcheol’s first kiss.

But maybe it was that anecdote that made them keep talking as they walked through the festival. He had even let the other use his camera to take some pictures of the beach and had ran away laughing when the other tried to push him into the water. They have talked about what they were doing in Busan, work and vacations, there was not deep information shared and Jihoon liked it that way. After all, he knew he would be going to Seoul in two days and this would be just like the first time and probably wouldn’t be seeing the other in years.

Jihoon played with that idea as he saw the other’s puppy eyes light up at the mention of ice cream and when they started dancing to the music without caring about the rest of the world. They swayed together with the music, laughing at their bad dancing skills. He tried not to get affected at their brushing hands or when Seungcheol moved strands of his hair out of his face. The sun had set completely and all Jihoon could see was Seungcheol’s face under the lights of the festival. His big smile and shinning eyes, Seungcheol looking mature but just as handsome as the first time he saw him. 

And Jihoon wanted to stop that thought, but the sudden idea of kissing the other appeared in his mind. It was a magnetic feeling, because he hadn’t noticed when they had gotten that close. But their locked gazes stayed that way and this time Jihoon was the one surprised when he felt the other’s plump lips touching his. He wished it had ended like that, for him to give a closure to that teenage memory with another anecdote they could laugh about and move on with their lives. But they kept kissing, and at first Jihoon thought he was listening to his racing heart, but then he noticed the fireworks were exploding in the sky. Jihoon felt the kiss in his lips, in his skin and in his heart. The kiss felt unique, explosive and never ending. 

But it ended, and Jihoon opened his eyes, that he hadn’t noticed he had closed, and looked at the other. Seungcheol looked back at him with a serene expression, before his face changed into a shocked one. He removed his arms from around Jihoon’s waist and Jihoon followed putting his arms down from the other’s neck. 

It wasn’t supposed to happen this way. I wasn’t even supposed to happen. He shouldn’t have met Seungcheol again, but it had happened. It had been like they weren’t thinking, just feeling.

“Jihoon, I…” The other couldn’t continue and just bit his lip.

“I…” Jihoon tried to start, but his thoughts were messed up.

He didn’t know how Seungcheol’s real life was, but as they stayed there in silence, Jihoon could guess the other hadn’t planned their encounter or at least for it to end this way. The other probably was dating someone else or could have a family and Jihoon had just appeared like a teenage dream. 

“It was nice meeting you again.” Seungcheol said when the silence became unbearable.

“Yeah…” Jihoon said and sighed looking down.

In the background there was an MC thanking and saying his goodbyes to the people that visited the festival. And when the people started walking towards the exit and pushed them slowly on their way, Seungcheol got even closer and whispered.

“Goodnight Jihoon.”

“Goodnight Seungcheol.” Jihoon said softly and his eyes fluttered closed when he felt Seungcheol kissing his cheek.

And then he was gone, brushing softly by his side; but Jihoon felt like a part of him was also gone.

Goodbye Seungcheol.


	6. Chapter 6

He had wanted to kiss him again. 

When Jihoon had looked down seemly embarrassed by their kiss, Seungcheol wanted to say him not to. That he had wanted to keep kissing with the same intensity. 

But he had to face reality. 

His reality was with Jeonghan. 

And he had meant to say goodbye, but he couldn’t. So he had taken a deep breath and said goodnight with a kiss on the cheek.  
It was like the end of a summer dream that could only stay in his memory. He was already lucky enough to have seen Jihoon once more.

Those sparkling eyes, sweet smile, beautiful hands and melodious voice accompanied him all his way to Seoul. But the guilty feeling appeared when he read Jeonghan’s message saying he had just arrived to Seoul and would be going directly to the hotel, because they were behind schedule for the grand opening. 

Jeonghan had been working really hard since he was appointed as one of the top managers a few years ago, but he knew his ultimate role would be general manager. It had become easier for Seungcheol to see the other at work than at their shared apartment; Jeonghan had a personal suite in a couple of his family hotels, so when he was really busy he would spend the night there. And that made Seungcheol feel even guiltier, because he knew Mr. Yoon and all the pressure he put in his son; and he was well aware of how much Jeonghan had defended him and their relationship in front of his father, so he shouldn’t be thinking of someone else.

But Seungcheol couldn’t erase Jihoon’s kiss out of his mind. The kiss wasn’t like any other he had before, it was beyond the lips. He felt in his body the excitement of kissing someone he desperately wanted to kiss, even when he knew they wouldn’t do anything further than that. He had the feeling in his gut that he wouldn’t be able to go on if he didn’t do it. 

It was a really strong feeling, but that wasn’t his reality. His reality was his engagement to Jeonghan. He had gotten used to that idea, but what he couldn’t keep up with was the pressure of their impending marriage. They had already postponed the date a couple of times, because Jeonghan wanted to focus on his work and Seungcheol had agreed. Seungcheol’s father always said that the Yoons were probably waiting for Seungcheol to assume his real role in Choi Company before planning the wedding, but Seungcheol wasn’t sure he wanted to be general manager. 

It hadn’t been easy balancing their relationship and work, and even when Jeonghan didn’t seem to want to let go of any of them, he just kept moving forward in his career, while their engagement seemed stuck in the same place. 

The feelings they shared at the beginning of their relationship were intense too. They were fresh out of university and wanted to do everything everywhere. They even made it into entertainment magazines headlines for being arrested for improper sexual behavior in public. They were obviously scolded, but Jeonghan seemed happier and that made him happy too. And when they finally took a hold of their responsibilities, they settled down and moved together and it was enough to know he would see Jeonghan after work to make his stressful day worthy. 

But with the years what he thought would be a comfortable companionship changed into a business partnership. Their parents got involved into new projects together and now it was up to them to make them reality and their relationship definitely took a blow because of that.

His life out of work seemed dull and he didn’t want to justify his thoughts about Jihoon, but it was like he had felt a spark inside he never felt before; and that scared him, because he knew it wasn’t real. They hadn’t actually shared any real information, so for Seungcheol to acknowledge Jihoon as a beautiful dream by the beach was the only way to appease his guilt.  
**********************************************************************************************************************************

“When you laughed, I loved it.  
And I, like a crazy person, got lost in your gaze  
The kiss that we shared in the night while you danced  
Those are things I didn't expect  
I felt like you liked me.”

“I like that song, Woozi hyung. Is that one of the songs we will show Vernon-ssi?” 

Jihoon didn’t know what to answer. This song wasn’t supposed to be heard by anyone except for him…or Seungcheol. 

“I’m very nervous about working with Vernon-ssi. He seems very chill, but manager hyung said we will have a special article in a magazine and I guess I feel pressured. My first album got everyone hyped up and…”

Jihoon tried to focus on Seungkwan’s rant instead of thinking about the song he had made as soon as he returned to his parents’ home in Busan after the festival. After all he was hired to compose and produce Seungkwan’s next album. He had started working two weeks ago and Soonyoung had introduced him to almost all the staff. His reputation as a well-known producer in Japan let him get along with the other producers rapidly, but what he wasn’t expecting was taking part of an important collaboration with Chwe Vernon. He was the winner of a rap contest and had already signed with another company, but a collaboration had been arranged with the super rookie Boo Seungkwan and would be promoted in music shows.

It was a great opportunity, except that every song Jihoon could think of was intended for another person. In less than a week the meeting to choose the collaboration song would take place and he felt stuck. The bittersweet feeling he had barely let him sleep. 

Mingyu had been really busy as he was working for two new brands at the same time and Jihoon felt happy and proud of him, but at the same time he felt guilty when he saw the other’s tired smile directed towards him when he arrived to their apartment.

He really thought it would end with the first song. Seungcheol was supposed to be a teenage dream, but Jihoon couldn’t stop thinking about the other and the guilt just kept competing with the fluttery feeling in his chest every time he made a new song about Seungcheol.

Through the years he never thought about his relationship with Mingyu as an endless thing, but the idea of breaking up with the other didn’t make sense to him. It was always comfortable with the other. They got along well in almost every sense and they had gotten used to their crazy schedules and habits, they had a balance. But the last year without Mingyu made him realize many things. He noticed he had let himself be dependable on the other. It was okay for a couple of weeks or so, but after half a year without the other his eating habits were trashed, their apartment turned into a mess and Jihoon suffered buying new clothes. He had worked hard to fix all of that as he didn’t want to repeat the cycle in Seoul. But Jihoon had also noticed he had missed Mingyu’s company in the middle of the night when he got frustrated with composing and wanted to talk or just wanted to cuddle. They had formed a long-term bond that Jihoon didn’t want to break. 

But the fluttery feeling…

Jihoon couldn’t remember it being there, not even in bed. He just felt good and protected. Mingyu was very supportive and when Jihoon moved to another city in Japan for university, a city full of strangers and away from his parents, he was the first person Jihoon put his trust into. He didn’t have to look further or search for another person. 

And the years had just passed by like that. At some point Jihoon stopped thinking about the possibility of Mingyu returning home and saying he had felt in love with some other model, or maybe he just stopped being scared of his own reaction to that news. The continuity of his relationship with Mingyu gave him an anchor, because Jihoon had been witness of all the drama some couples around him went through in the last years and he never felt he had to worry about that with Mingyu. He felt like that until now.

But he didn’t want to say a word about it. Because at the end of the day it was Mingyu with whom Jihoon would be sleeping in bed, not Seungcheol; a stranger that had puppy eyes and bright smile, a stranger that loved ice cream and was terrible at dancing, a stranger with plump lips and magical kisses, a stranger that lived in a different reality.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The lyrics are the translation of the song “Te vi” by Piso 21. The lyrics in Spanish are the following: 
> 
> “Cuando te reías, me encantaba  
Y yo como loco, perdido en tu mirada  
Ese beso que nos dimos en la noche mientras bailabas  
Son cosas que no me esperaba  
Sentí que yo te gustaba”


	7. Chapter 7

It had been an extremely busy day for Seungcheol. Even when the Choi Company had the exclusive for their magazine, he had to work along the Yoon’s PR team to manage the press and the famous guests for the opening party. The grand salon was beautifully decorated and many of the guests had already arrived. The Yoons were great hosts used to such big parties and Seungcheol felt like he could finally take a breath. 

He walked towards one of the balconies with a glass of champagne in his hand and looked down to the city. Even when it was a nice view, the sound of the music inside mixed with the sound of cars outside didn’t let him relax. He wondered if he had also been bewished by Busan's beach scenery or maybe it was just the image of Jihoon there that made him remember that place. 

“Forget about it.” He said with a tired voice. 

He had been trying not to think about it in the last month, but there were moments like this when all he could think about was the other. And it went beyond their last encounter, because Seungcheol wondered what would have happened when they were teenagers if things had been different. He wondered what would have happened if his mother’s condition didn’t turn worse. Would they have seen each other by the beach the following weeks? Would have his mother approve of him? Would-

“Seungcheol?” 

He turned around to face Jeonghan’s puzzled face. 

“What are you doing here? I told you that as soon as you finished coordinating with Mr. Han you should go to our table. There are a lot of potential clients and investors I must introduce you to.” 

Seungcheol sighed before emptying his glass. It would be a long night.

They entered the grand salon once again and as soon as Jeonghan reached one of the well-dressed guests, Seungcheol stopped being just Seungcheol. He knew that for both of them it was more like a business briefing than a party per se, but even when others knew about their engagement, Jeonghan always addressed him as Mr. Choi, heir of Choi Company. 

He was glad some of their friends were invited to the party so he could take a little break talking to Hyunwoo and Hoseok. They knew there was something going on with him, but Seungcheol had decided to keep his Busan memory buried in his mind. He didn’t want to risk Hyunwoo telling Minhyuk about it and Jeonghan would definitely find out then.

And it wasn’t like he wanted to avoid Jeonghan, but he was getting tired of the introductions and telling the benefits of working with Choi Company to those potential clients. His father was in Hong Kong for another project and Seungcheol had received emails, messages and calls all about how he should behave at the party and what clients he should target to. 

He looked around and saw Hyungwon, one of the famous fashions designers Choi Company worked with, surrounded by a bunch of models including the ones he already knew from the last magazine issue like Jun, Changkyun and Mingyu. 

He decided to approach the group since he knew most of them, but as people started dancing in the middle, he stayed in his place listening to the music. He wasn’t a good dancer at all, he had taken classes forced by his father, but he didn’t have the ability. He sighed, because he knew his mind was taking him to memories of dancing with a certain person at the beach festival, but when he looked at the group of models again his eyes widened and his mouth opened in shock.  
*************************************************************************************************************************************

“Jihoon, you promised. You can’t say no now.” Mingyu whined pulling Jihoon’s arm.

Mingyu had bought him a suit for the party and as much a Jihoon wanted to deny it, he looked good in it. It was just he wasn’t prepared to face Mingyu’s model friends at the party. It would be his official introduction as Mingyu’s boyfriend and he felt terrible, because that smiling stranger hadn’t been erased from his mind. 

“Jihoon… Jihoon…Jihoon.” He looked up and saw Mingyu’s concerned face. “Are you ok?” 

“Yes.” He said even when he felt like his head would explode any minute.

“So let’s get ready. I can even introduce you to the fashion designer I work with. The one Minghao introduced me to when I arrived to Korea.”

Jihoon just nodded softly and let the other pull him towards their walking closet. 

And Jihoon just let the time pass by, listening to Mingyu’s voice like a lullaby. So he was surprised when Mingyu’s hand touched his letting him know they had arrived to the party. It was a really fancy hotel full of beautiful people and Jihoon felt intimidated once again. This wasn’t his usual environment. Even when he had met many singers, in the recording room everybody seemed more comfortable, without elegant clothes or makeup. 

“Jihoon?” Mingyu asked when he noticed the other stopped walking at the entrance of the salon.

“Are you feeling sick?” He asked touching Jihoon’s forehead.

Jihoon took his hand away and gave the taller a small smile. “I’m fine. Let’s go inside.”

He had to face it. This was important for Mingyu and it didn’t matter how many songs he had written with Seungcheol as inspiration, he was here as Mingyu’s boyfriend and this could only make their relationship stronger.

“This is Woozi, my boyfriend.” Mingyu said cheerfully when they met the other models and Jihoon just bowed and gave them a small smile.

As soon as Jihoon first composed song was released back in Japan, he told Mingyu he should address him as Woozi in front of other people from their work, because Jihoon wanted to keep his privacy. The other accepted without further questions and it had been a normal thing between them since then.

And Jihoon was somewhat glad Mingyu had used that term with his model friends, because even when the models were nice to him, he still felt like he didn’t belong.

He was just returning from the restroom when he saw a familiar face in the middle of the crowd. He stopped in his tracks and blinked not believing it. He waited for the other person to take notice of him and when he did Jihoon gave him a bright smile.

It had been just a bit more than a month since they last saw each other, but Jihoon knew he wouldn’t feel out of place anymore. 

“Baekho hyung!” He greeted the other happily.

“Woozi, it’s nice to see you again. Everyone misses you back in Japan.” The other said giving him a short hug.

They had become friends after working together for the last three years producing songs for Japanese artists and as soon as they started talking animatedly about music, Jihoon let himself relax. Mingyu had told him there would be many other music related guests, but Jihoon was never good at socializing in parties, so it was great to spend time with a close friend. But as time passed, he started having an internal debate if he should tell the other about Seungcheol. He hadn’t told Soonyoung because he was scared of what the other would say. He could be very supportive or be his worst critic.

“Woozi, I need to go to talk with the producer that invited me here. Do you want to meet him?” 

Jihoon thought for a moment before rejecting the offer. He guessed his hyung would have important business to take care of and since he had spent enough time in the party, he could finally tell Mingyu he would be returning to their apartment.

He walked slowly, trying to avoid the dancing people in the middle of the way until he reached Mingyu. The other looked at him like asking what took him so long to return, but Jihoon just gave him a small smile. Mingyu let him be and turned his attention back to the other models talking, but not before he put his arm around Jihoon’s waist. Jihoon was not a PDA kind of guy, but he guessed Mingyu wanted to give him reassurance. Jihoon appreciated the gesture and rested his head on Mingyu’s chest.

He was sure he was getting sleepy in that position, but as his eyes followed the dancing figures in the middle of the salon, he noticed a figure at the other side that stood out like the full moon in the night sky.


	8. Chapter 8

Seungcheol was about to run to meet the other when he was stopped by Wonwoo. 

“Mr. Choi, I just confirmed that Mr. Kang would do the interview with Mr. Boo and Mr. Chwe for the collaboration. Also the photographer is ready for the scheduled dates. The team just wanted to confirm if you will go to the first meeting too.” 

Seungcheol tried to process every word his assistant was saying, but his eyes just kept trying to find Jihoon’s figure that was held in Mingyu’s arms.

“I’ll confirm you later Wonwoo. Now I need you to go to that group of models and get the information of all the ones we haven’t worked with, of every person that we haven’t worked with.” Seungcheol said with an earnest voice. 

He realized he just couldn’t rush to Jihoon and ask him if he was dating Mingyu or what was he doing at the party. He knew Jihoon didn’t owe him any explanation, but Seungcheol wanted to know, needed to know. Jihoon was probably a photographer, since he seemed to adore the camera he carried to the festival. 

Seungcheol’s heartbeat increased with every step Wonwoo took closer to the group. Maybe this wasn’t a good idea either. Seungcheol felt like he was losing his mind with every passing second. He shouldn’t be concerned with Jihoon anymore. He had decided that he wasn’t his reality and he was in Jeonghan’s party, he shouldn’t be thinking of someone else. 

“Seungcheol?” 

His heart stopped for a second and he jumped scared at the hand that had just touched his shoulder.

“Are you ok? You seem to be on the edge the last weeks.” Hoseok said with a smile.

“I’m fine, just thinking about some work stuff.” 

Seungcheol hoped the other stopped asking things.

“I don’t know if Jeonghan believes your lies, but work is obviously not the reason of your weird behavior.” 

Seungcheol sighed; he really didn’t want to talk about it in the party. But he also knew he had to talk to someone about it or he will turn crazy. 

“Tomorrow we’ll talk. How about dinner?” 

Hoseok nodded and patted his shoulder softy. 

“By the way, Jeonghan is looking for you.”  
****************************************************************************************************************************

After making sure he wasn’t imagining things and the person standing across the room was in fact Seungcheol, Jihoon turned around and buried his face in Mingyu’s chest. 

He wanted to believe this wasn’t happening. Not in such a public place, not with people Mingyu knew, not with Mingyu just beside him. Jihoon didn’t know if it was better to keep hiding his face like this when he was almost sure Seungcheol had already seen him or if he should just run outside the room.

“Woozi-ssi?” Jihoon turned around slowly with Mingyu’s help and was suddenly faced with a tall male that also looked like a model.

“Woozi, I was just telling Wonwoo-hyung that you are my boyfriend.” Mingyu said with a soft smile. 

Jihoon greeted the other with a small bow.

“I’m Jeon Wonwoo, Mr. Choi assistant.” The other said shortly as if that explained everything.

“Wonwoo-ssi, why do you always have to be that serious? It’s not like Mr. Choi prohibits you from smiling.” Other model started teasing the male, followed by Mingyu and his friends.

But Jihoon just wanted to bury himself in Mingyu’s chest and disappear. He had more important things in his mind than meeting another of Mingyu’s acquaintances. 

“Jihoon, are you ok?” He heard Mingyu’s soft voice in his ear.

“I think I need some air. I’ll go to the balcony for a moment.” Jihoon said and practically ran away before Mingyu could ask something else. 

And when he finally arrived there he took a deep breath. He needed to relax his nerves. Mingyu had already noticed there was something going on with him and if Jihoon told him he wanted to leave now, Mingyu would definitely start asking questions. 

“Jihoon?”

Jihoon turned his face so fast he felt dizzy. But he had recognized that voice. He could recognize it anywhere.

“Seungcheol…”

“You…I….”

The words didn’t make sense and all they could do was stare back at the other.

It went beyond how good looking Seungcheol looked in that suit or with that hairstyle. 

His eyes were shinning and he had a confused smile that Jihoon would be laughing at if he wasn’t feeling exactly the same. 

He wasn’t sure how long they stayed there looking at each other, with the music surrounding them and with the building’s lights creating a beautiful scene.

“Mr. Choi?” 

A sudden voice interrupted them and they both looked at the person that had just emerged from the grand salon.


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I added a small part of Jeonghan's POV at the end of the chapter.

“Oh, excuse me. I’m Yoon Jeonghan, manager of this hotel. Hope you are enjoying the party.” Jeonghan said his practiced speech in front of Jihoon and Seungcheol could only sigh.

“I’m sorry, but I need to discuss an important matter with Mr. Choi. If you could excuse us, he will definitely contact you. Business partners and clients are the priority of Choi Company.” Jeonghan continued with his practiced smile.

Seungcheol wanted to say something, but he could only look back at Jihoon’s confused eyes. It was like Jihoon was looking at him for the first time. And it seemed like he wasn’t having a good first impression.

“Mr. Choi.” Jeonghan said patting his arm softly. 

Seungcheol didn’t want to follow him, but when he saw Jihoon turning his back at him, he knew this would turn even messier if he stayed. So he just followed Jeonghan inside and was met with Mr. Yoon who started talking about how they had confirmed the room for the press conference of a drama that Mrs. Yoon wanted to see. And Jeonghan stayed there expressionlessly, but Seungcheol could see his tense shoulders, just like every time he was next to his father.

And Seungcheol felt like the worst person in the world listening to his fiancé’s father talking and with his fiancé there, but all he could think about was Jihoon’s expression looking as he had been slapped awake.

“I need to go…I need to check something about….work…” Seungcheol said interrupting Mr. Yoon and looked around trying to find Hoseok.

If looking for Jihoon could turn the party into a mess, at least he needed someone to talk about his internal crisis.

He didn’t care that Jeonghan called him back or that he ignored one of the guests that greeted him. He needed to let everything out of his chest. 

He wanted someone to tell him that this was a mistake. That no matter how excited he was to see Jihoon, he wouldn’t feel bad if this wasn’t a mistake. That he wouldn’t be acting like crazy if this wasn’t wrong.

He had let Jihoon affect him more than he should for a person he barely knew and whatever it was he had felt for the other in Busan must be forgotten and things would return to normal.

So he could work as always, concentrate as always, be with Jeonghan as always. No matter how much a simple encounter with Jihoon had lighten up his life, Jihoon had seemed so betrayed after listening to Jeonghan’s words that Seungcheol just wanted to stop this mess once for all.  
*******************************************************************************************************************************

“Mr. Choi.” Jihoon repeated softly as soon as the other two left.

He knew Mingyu worked as a model for some of the Choi Company’s magazine issues and worked with fashion designers affiliated to the company, but today he had found out two new things from Mingyu’s friends conversation that he didn’t know were related to him at all.

Mr. Choi was the heir of Choi Company.

Mr. Choi was engaged to the heir of Yoon Hotels, Yoon Jeonghan. 

And he had witnessed one last piece of information that made him rethink everything that had happened that day at the beach.

Mr. Choi was Seungcheol.

Seungcheol.

The same guy that had seemed so free while dancing and laughing with him. The same guy that had caressed his hands softly and had kissed him hard.

But Jihoon felt like he was seeing him for the first time. Like he wasn’t looking at Seungcheol, but at Mr. Choi.

With a shaky laugh he grabbed his phone and called Soonyoung.

He couldn’t hide it anymore and he knew he could only trust Soonyoung with this new information, these new feelings.

He could feel his hands trembling as he waited for the other to answer.

What was he supposed to say?

Hey Soonyoung, remember Seungcheol? We met again and kissed. And I haven’t been able to stop thinking about him. I even wrote songs about him. But guess what? He is the f*cking heir of Choi Company. Yes, the company Mingyu works with. And he is f*cking engaged.

Jihoon didn’t understand why he felt his eyes watering.

He had admitted in Busan that he didn’t know a thing about Seungcheol and that was fine. He had accepted the fact that maybe the other was in a relationship or even had kids. He shouldn’t be feeling this shocked, this betrayed. 

“Jihoon, what’s wrong?” Jihoon heard Soonyoung’s worried voice over of the phone.

“Come pick me up Soonyoung, I need to get out of here.” 

He gave the other the name of the hotel and stayed in the balcony begging the sky Mingyu wouldn’t appear looking for him.  
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Jeonghan couldn’t understand what had just happened. His father had a frown on his face and looked at him like scolding him for  
Seungcheol’s actions, but Jeonghan was just confused.

After returning from Jeju, he had been so busy with the preparations for the opening party that he was really tired and if he returned to their shared apartment they would barely talk and go to sleep. 

He wasn’t oblivious, he had noticed Seungcheol wasn’t the same as always, but he tried to think it was because the other had been in Busan. He knew all about his mother’s sickness and how Seungcheol had been worried about staying with his grandmother, but he didn’t want to make Seungcheol think about that more than he already was. It was better if he was focused on the advertisement plan for the party and coordinating the special article in the magazine. 

Jeonghan didn’t want to think of himself as a selfish person, but this was his great opportunity to show his father he could do it on his own. That he could coordinate everything with the business partners and the employees and he could make the investment in the new hotel even more profitable.

And he had considered that the other was also stressed, but he hadn’t expected Seungcheol to cut his fathers’ conversation and leave. Also Seungcheol kept hanging out with his friends instead of staying by his side to meet potential clients. And also who was that guy that Jeonghan had never seen before? 

So many things to ask, but Jeonghan didn’t have time to go after Seungcheol with his father pulling him around to greet the different group of investors at the party. He just wished that at the end of the night he could talk to Seungcheol calmly and settle whatever it was that was making the other act like crazy.

Because Seungcheol was still a bit of a revel among the heirs of their age, most of them had already taken top managerial roles or were about to be appointed as general managers, but Seungcheol was still a small department manager. Jeonghan’s father hated that fact, but Jeonghan couldn’t complain. If that was what Seungcheol wanted and if it kept him by Jeonghan’s side, he wouldn’t complain.

Jeonghan didn’t want to let go of what he had now, no matter what his father say or the pressure on both of them. He felt comfortable this way and if he had to keep covering Seungcheol’s job decision and keep postponing their marriage to keep this balance, he would do it.

He would not make the same stupid mistake he did when he was younger.


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> At the end of the chapter I added Mingyu's POV.

Seungcheol took another shot nodding his head slowly with every sentence Hoseok said.

His entire speech was full of ‘are you crazy?’, ‘Jeonghan is going to kill you’, ‘I need another drink to understand this’.

But what really resonated in Seungcheol was ‘do you even know him?’

That was the exact reason Seungcheol didn’t understand why meeting Jihoon again affected him that much. He never believed in love at first sight, and he knew this wasn’t love, but there was this intense attraction he felt for the other that didn’t let him think straight. 

As soon as he found Hoseok, he pulled him out of the party and they ended up drinking in his friend’s apartment. He could see how Hoseok face transformed from a teasing expression to a confused one to an exasperated one.

“Seungcheol, you need to stop this. How do you even know he didn’t look out for you on purpose? If he is close to the models we would have heard about him before. Do some research about him for your own safety; I don’t believe this is a coincidence.”

“Hoseok…” Seungcheol said with a tired expression. “Have you listened to what I said? He was really shocked when Jeonghan called me Mr. Choi, we never said our last names. I’m sure he wasn’t expecting me to be the heir of Choi Company.”

Seungcheol had once told his friends about how he got his first kiss stolen by Jihoon, but for Hoseok to believe that Jihoon would search for him only for convenience was something he couldn’t accept.

“Anyway, you need to stop this. You said that he could be dating a model and you are engaged to Jeonghan. This would be a complete mess if somebody else find out, Mr. Yoon would hunt you down.”

“I know…” Seungcheol said burying his face in the back of the sofa.

“Then what’s the problem?” Hoseok said sitting beside Seungcheol.

“I-….I want to see him again.” Seungcheol responded turning to look at his friend and Hoseok frowned.

“Seungcheol, I won’t agree with you cheating on Jeonghan, but if you need to do it with that guy for this to end then just go and finish this.”

“It’s not like that Hoseok! When we were at the beach we talked about the most random things. Our favorite ice cream flavor, our favorite colors and songs. We talked about the beach, the weather and took pictures. We talked about our first encounter in the festival….I almost told him about my mother. I felt that comfortable with him… And I kissed him, I wanted to kiss him. But I did it because I wanted to take a part of him with me and I wanted him to keep a part of me. I wanted to close our teenage story and he really looked like an angel. I didn’t think we would meet again like this.”

“So you want to be with him?”

“I don’t know…..” Seungcheol said burying his face in the back of the sofa again.

“This is so mess up.” Hoseok said taking another shot.  
*********************************************************************************************************************************

Jihoon couldn’t remember the last time he drank like this, but after listening to Soonyoung’s speech he needed to drink.

‘Can’t believe you hid this from me!’, ‘are you crazy?’, ‘are you going to break up with Mingyu?’

“I don’t know….” That was all Jihoon could answer to those questions. 

“You do understand he is engaged, right? To another heir…”

Jihoon nodded and put his face against the table.

“Are you going to destroy your relationship of years with Mingyu just for an escapade with an heir?”

Jihoon didn’t know what to answer to that. Was that what he was for Seungcheol? Just an escapade? 

But it had felt so real back in Busan. Like the other was really interested in him. Even when they didn’t share much personal information it still felt intimate.

“I wrote songs about him…” He said softly when he felt Soonyoung petting his hair.

“Then leave him like that, as a distant muse. You don’t want to hurt Mingyu, right?” 

Jihoon sat down straight again and shook his head. He would never want to hurt Mingyu. He had been there for him all these years and he had a special place in Jihoon’s heart.

“Is this the end of this then? You are not going to search for him, right?” Soonyoung said putting his hands on top of Jihoon’s shoulders.

“What if I see him again?” Jihoon said softly “It could happen…”

“Then you ran away! His fiancé is going to hunt you down if he knows.”

“I just want to talk to him.”

Jihoon really wanted to talk to Seungcheol again. It would be like meeting him for the first time. He felt like he knew half of the person he was and his mind had created a fantasy for the rest. But if he got to finally meet the real person Choi Seungcheol- heir of Choi Company was, he could finally let go of this dream-like encounter at the beach.  
####################################################################################################

Mingyu kept calling, but Jihoon never answered. The last time he saw him was when told him he was going out for some air, and then he disappeared for the rest of the night. He asked some of his friends at the party about his boyfriend’s whereabouts, but just one of them told him he saw Jihoon with Mr. Choi and the heir of Yoon Hotels. Mingyu wondered what the two heirs would want to talk about with Jihoon. He was a famous producer, but not many people knew his face outside of the music world. 

He decided to return to their apartment trying not to worry so much about Jihoon, because he knew parties weren’t his forte. But when he didn’t find him there he started to worry for real. He decided to call the other again, when he received a message from Soonyoung saying he was with Jihoon and Mingyu should come and pick him up. Mingyu had learnt to accept the close relationship Jihoon had with Soonyoung, but it did bother him that the other hadn’t told him about leaving the party and going to drink with his friend. 

“Jihoon?” Mingyu said softly trying to wake up the other so it would be easier to carry him to the car.

The other opened his eyes a bit and when he noticed him, he hugged him with such strength Mingyu almost fell on top of him. Soonyoung gave him a worried look before telling him to keep an eye on Jihoon. Mingyu nodded and left the apartment with a clingy Jihoon in his arms.

He had noted Jihoon weird behavior since he arrived to Seoul. At first Mingyu had taken it as getting used to the city and work, as he was too busy to stay for long with Jihoon. But then he started thinking if what made Jihoon uncomfortable was his presence. In all honesty, Mingyu thought Jihoon would break up with him when he decided to move back to Korea. 

He knew their relationship had suffered the consequences of one year of being separated, but maybe things went beyond that. They had been so busy during their last months in Japan together that he wondered if what they were doing as a couple was just a habit.

“I miss you.” He said softly, kissing Jihoon’s head after putting him in the passenger’s seat.


	11. Chapter 11

Seungcheol head was killing him. And after listening to his father scolding him through the phone for ignoring his previous calls and because of his rude behavior at the party, Seungcheol just wanted to sleep till the next year.

“I had to tell Jeonghan you were here. He was calling you all night.” Hoseok appeared with two cups of coffee in his hands.

Seungcheol thanked him and proceed to drink the beverage with his eyes closed. He wondered how long he could prolong his stay without Hoseok kicking him out. 

“You know you have to return to Jeonghan, that’s the right decision.” 

Seungcheol sighed. After his father’s company started doing business with the Yoons, it seemed that Jeonghan was always the right decision. But when he returned to his apartment, half scared of Jeonghan’s anger, he found a sleepy Jeonghan watching a movie in the living room.

The other turned to look at him when he opened the front door and gave him a small smile.

“I guess the stress make us act crazy.” He said standing up and grabbing Seungcheol’s hand to pull him to the sofa. 

Seungcheol blinked. He didn’t know what he was expecting the other to say, but it was definitely not this. 

“Aren’t you mad?” He asked confused.

“Are you going to stay with me?” Jeonghan asked and Seungcheol almost choked.

“What?”

“My father made an entire drama about you leaving the party, but I don’t care.” He said looking down at their connected hands. 

“But I do care. I’m sorry. I…”

“Whatever it is I’ll cover it up, you know that.”

Seungcheol sighed. 

“I need you here with me. I will be appointed as general manager as soon as the new hotel reaches the break-even point. We need to have a strong image.” Jeonghan said breathing heavily and Seungcheol could feel how his hands were shaking.

So he just sighed again and didn’t say a word. But on the inside, he scolded himself for acting crazy because of Jihoon, when he was well aware that Jeonghan was under a lot of pressure and needed his support. 

So he gave his fiancé a hug and Jeonghan returned it with a long sigh. 

“Maybe you should take some vacations before you start your new job?”

He knew Jeonghan loved to travel; they had been in so many places as soon as they graduated from university. But after they started working, they had only traveled because of work. And it had been a while since they had been in a date or hung out with friends in a non-work related way. Maybe that was the reason meeting another person seemed so interesting, maybe-

“I’m too busy for that Seungcheol. My father-” Jeonghan started.

“Stop. Don’t start your sentence with ‘my father says’…Aren’t you tired?” Seungcheol could hear the exasperation in his voice. 

He had never complaint about the other’s working schedule and tried to be understanding about how different their upbringing was and the pressure on Jeonghan’s side, but he was tired of listening Jeonghan talk about his father’s words as if it was the law. This was one of the things that always created tension between them.

He could see Jeonghan’s shocked expression, but then his face turned into a serious one and with a stern voice he said something that left Seungcheol speechless.

“Since I was a kid my father prepared this plan for me and I never had a chance to choose. I worked my entire life for this, everything I did was to be worthy of this position. And I’m tired; I have been so tired I wanted to die. I broke my heart by giving up so many things because I was afraid of ruining this plan, but I have learnt to get away with some of my own choices. And now I have found a balance and I’m so close to the goal. That place will give me the privilege to create my own plan, but until then….” Jeonghan bit his lower lip as tears pooled in his eyes.

Seungcheol could only look at the other in shock. His own father was always meddling in his life and wanted him to accept a higher position in the company, but Seungcheol never felt like he couldn’t choose. Jeonghan had told him about the pressure of being the heir of Yoon Hotels, but the other had never been so blunt about it, always keeping the deep thoughts to himself. And Seungcheol felt the need to protect and support Jeonghan more than ever before. 

But on the hand, other thoughts were flooding his mind. He knew he wasn’t Mr. Yoon’s first or even last choice to be Jeonghan’s husband, but somehow Jeonghan had managed to get them engaged. And Seungcheol didn’t want to think about Jeonghan sticking with him just to prove a point or to go against his father’s options for a suitor. 

“Let’s go to sleep Seungcheol. Tomorrow we have the meeting to see the results for the opening party project.” Jeonghan said giving him a small smile, no more tears in his eyes.  
**************************************************************************************************************************************

In the following week after the party, Mingyu had canceled many appointments and had tried to spend a lot of time with Jihoon. And since they had already finished the process for the collaboration song and the artists were focused on the performance, Jihoon tried to free his schedule too.

They never talked about what happened after the party, but Jihoon could feel Mingyu’s gaze on him every time he turned around. They had spent great moments eating out and going to the movies and such, but it felt like there was a delicate curtain between them. He knew Mingyu didn’t know about what happened, but the other didn’t ask and Jihoon didn’t dare to tell. 

“Maybe we should return to Japan.” Mingyu said lying on the bed next to Jihoon, his gaze fixed in the ceiling. 

Jihoon could only stare at the other in shock.

“I know you have been here just for a short time, but....” Mingyu said, his face showing sorrow. 

“Do you think we were happier in Japan?” Jihoon felt guilty for asking that question.

“I think you were…” Mingyu said turning to look at him and caressing his face.

Jihoon could feel his eyes moistening. “I’m sorry.”

He suddenly felt Mingyu’s arms around him.

“No, I’m sorry. It’s just….I wanted to spend this week with you because I’ll have some projects in Europe for a month.”

Jihoon could only sigh. He couldn’t blame the other for working; he loved his work as much as Jihoon enjoyed staying in the studio creating music. 

“I’m going to miss you.” The taller said giving him a kiss on the cheek and Jihoon finally let his tears flow.

His heart was in pain because he didn’t want to hurt Mingyu, but after the last week with the other, he had noticed how holding his hand or kissing him wasn’t the same as when they were in Japan. And yet, he felt like he needed Mingyu here to anchor him; because after being pestered by Soonyoung, Jihoon had finally managed to ignore everything related to Seungcheol. And maybe he could finally start rebuilding his relationship with Mingyu. 

But after a long silence, in which Mingyu tried to wipe his tears away, Jihoon said with a determined voice. 

“I’ll make a song for you.” 

And he could see how Mingyu’s face lit up after listening to his words.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading~ I wanted to show the difference between the two couple's relationships.


	12. Chapter 12

The board meeting had taken longer than expected and Seungcheol was late for the meeting with the artists for the collaboration. He was glad Wonwoo was there to proceed with the meeting and they were already done with the introductions and the interview to the singers. His last update before arriving to the music company was that the photographer was taking pictures for the magazine cover.

“Mr. Choi, glad you could make it.” 

Seungcheol turned around to meet the manager of Boo Seungkwan. 

He bowed and followed the other to the dance practice room where the artists were being photographed.

“Seungkwan-ssi, Vernon-ssi, this is Mr. Choi Seungcheol.” The manager introduced him.

Seungcheol was excited to meet them both. He was a fan of their music and he loved to sing to their songs when he was alone. This was a part of his job that he liked a lot, meeting new people and people whom he admired. He was enjoying his conversation when he received a call from Wonwoo asking him if he could meet him in one of the conference rooms in the building. 

When he arrived, Wonwoo was waiting for him outside and updated him about the schedule and how another project they had to work on had been moved to a new date. Seungcheol took notice and as they entered the room Wonwoo gave him more information.

“Mr. Kang is doing the last interview to the producers and composers for the collaboration song. Bumzu-ssi and Woozi-ssi.”

Seungcheol nodded in understanding, but what he wasn’t expecting was that one of them would be Jihoon. 

So he waited till the interview was over trying not to look at the other. The week after the party he had tried to focus all his energy into work. And even when he didn’t have any pending project with the Yoons, he still visited Jeonghan at work; because beyond his doubts, he couldn’t reject the other’s request for support. 

But even after all that, he had met Jihoon again. And at this point they seemed to be even more strangers than before. Because the Jihoon he had met in Busan may not even be the one that was in the conference room. Jihoon, is that was even his name, could have invented everything he said because he wasn’t expecting to meet Seungcheol again. Or maybe Hoseok was right and Jihoon-

“Nice to meet you, Mr. Choi., I’m Lee Woozi, one of the producers.” Seungcheol couldn’t stop his surprise expression after hearing the other’s voice.

He could see how tense Jihoon….Woozi looked, giving him a polite smile as if he was really a stranger. 

“Nice to meet you Woozi-ssi, I’m Choi Seungcheol.” 

Jihoon, well,Woozi bowed his head and let his coworkers introduce themselves, but all Seungcheol could think about was how he could find a moment to talk to the other in private.

But he didn’t have to wait long.

The other personnel decided it was time for a break and invited them, but Jihoon-Woozi rejected looking directly at him and Seungcheol rejected as well. They stayed in silence until the others left the room and couldn’t hear them and then Ji-Woozi turned to him.

“Let’s go to my studio.” He said and started walking away from the conference room.

Seungcheol followed silently feeling that everyone walking through the hallways was observing him. He wasn’t even doing anything, but he felt guilty somehow. And when they entered the studio, Woozi told him to sit in the sofa while he sat in a chair close to the door, like he wanted to be as far away as possible from him.

“I want to introduce myself again.” Woozi started. ”I’m Lee Jihoon, but I go by the name Lee Woozi for my work as a music producer. My boyfriend is the model Kim Mingyu and he works sometimes for the Choi Company. And I went to Busan for vacations before I started working. So, who are you for real?” He said every word with a serious and clear voice like he wanted to put even more distance between them.

Long gone were the shy smiles and bright eyes. And maybe that was for the best.

“I’m Choi Seungcheol, heir of Choi Company and manager of team A for the event and advertisement department. I’m en-engaged to Yoon Jeonghan and…… I did go to Busan for work. I never lied to you. I may have not said my father owned a company, but it was really me talking.…How about you?”  
*************************************************************************************************************************************  
Jihoon wasn’t expecting Seungcheol to be so honest and kind with him. He thought the other would get angry or offended by his attitude and they could finally call an end to whatever their past encounters were.

“Jihoon, I mean…. Woozi-ssi….You said you liked music a lot, but I never thought you actually were a music producer.”

“What did you think I was?” Jihoon was actually interested in that answer. Normally when he introduced himself to other people around the music industry, they already knew about his past works and respected him. He wondered if every person Seungcheol met already knew about him being an heir.

“Maybe a photographer?...Actually, I didn’t thought about it in that moment…Did you think about what could be my job?” Seungcheol said with a confused smile. 

Jihoon thought for a moment before he let out a chuckle. 

They were actually two strangers that felt an inexplicable attraction towards each other without further background. It was somehow ridiculous and it could ruin so many things. Soonyoung was right and it was better to end it all. Jihoon couldn’t keep going crazy for a fantasy.

“I think we shouldn’t see each other again.” He said looking directly at the other.

Seungcheol faced turned serious. “Jiho-Woozi, I-“

“You are engaged and I have my boyfriend. That kiss wasn’t supposed to happen. None of this is supposed to be happening.” Jihoon looked at the other with the most serious expression he could manage.

“Jihoon, Woo- I can call you Jihoon, right?”

Jihoon nodded, maybe it would be the last time he could call the other Seungcheol too. 

“Jihoon, I don’t how to explain this but during all this time I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you; about our meeting in Busan. I know I’m engaged and you are in a relationship, but I’m not trying to play with you or your feelings, it’s just that-“

Jihoon had to stop him. 

With a hand on top of the other’s mouth he gave him a small nod. That was exactly what he was feeling. It was inexplicable how he felt for  
the other, but he didn’t want to get there. It would only complicate things.

“What do you really want Seungcheol? Because I’m sure you won’t break your engagement for this.”

Jihoon had been thinking about what Soonyoung said, about how he was just an escapade for the heir, and Jihoon was not going to play that game. 

“I want to meet you again.”


	13. Chapter 13

Seungcheol couldn’t remember the last time he had been this nervous. Jihoon had stayed in silence for what felt like an hour before he accepted meeting him again and only three days after, he was sitting in his favorite café waiting for the other’s arrival. 

Jihoon had refused to give him his phone number, so for respect to the other he hadn’t asked around for it. And maybe it was for the best, because he had chickened out at least ten times before he decided to come inside the café.

The last time he had seen Jihoon, the other remained serious all the time and his words had stayed engraved in Seungcheol’s head. The other had made it really clear he was in a relationship, and Seungcheol was reminded again of his engagement. 

He couldn’t say he hadn’t played with the idea of breaking up with Jeonghan before. There were several reasons for it, but when he met the other it always seemed like the wrong time to talk about it, and now it could be the worst time for that. And it’s not like he could say to Jihoon that he was breaking up his engagement because of him. All those confusing thoughts were making him even more nervous about the meeting. But he didn’t regret asking the other too see each other again. 

He had come to the conclusion that his relationship with Jeonghan had fallen out of physical and emotional attraction and after thinking what could be the reason to his reaction to meeting Jihoon, everything fell into place. Jihoon was attractive, they shared a teenage memory that made him feel excited when he saw the other again in Busan and they had shared a pleasant time by the beach. Seungcheol knew he was oversimplifying things, but he wanted to start again. To see Jihoon as more than an illusion by the beach, and meet Lee Jihoon as the music producer he was bound to keep encountering in the future.

He wanted to be objective about this meeting and had tried to structure it all in his mind, but he couldn’t help the smile on his face and his racing heart when he saw the other entering the café at the exact time they had scheduled.

Jihoon looked nervous and a bit underdressed for the fancy café, but Seungcheol’s smile only grew when the other finally noticed him.

“It’s nice to see you again, Jihoon.”  
**************************************************************************************************************************************

Jihoon wanted to run, he had decided to leave the café and call Soonyoung so the other could scold him and he could forget all about this; but then he noticed Seungcheol had already seeing him and decided to stay. The café was fancier in comparison to the places Jihoon liked to go, and his choice of clothes made it obvious, after all he was dressed up for working at the studio.

He approached the table and responded to the other’s greet politely before he sat down. He felt awkward and excited at the same time and almost sure he had made a mistake by accepting the meeting. But then, he couldn’t deny he was a bit interested in knowing what the other wanted to talk about, as it seemed they would end up seeing each other again for work in the next few weeks.

“I listened to the collaboration song, it is really good! Maybe you could show me more of your past works.” Seungcheol said after the waiter brought their orders and the silence started to turn unbearable.

It seemed Seungcheol wanted to keep the conversation work-related and Jihoon could deal with that.

“This is my first time working for Korean singers, all my previous works were in Japanese.”

“Oh~ So you used to live in Japan?! I love Tokyo, I went there with my brother when I was in college, but since then I have only been there for work.” Seungcheol said frowning at the last part.

“Yeah, I-” Jihoon started, thinking what could be the best way to keep the control of the conversation. “I went there to finish high school, and met Mingyu in university. We have been living together since we were freshmen.” 

Seungcheol was about to say something, but stopped himself like thinking what he should say next. And suddenly Jihoon felt nervous.

“So…you went to Japan just after the Busan beach festival?”

Jihoon was surprised about the other’s assumption and nodded slowly.

“So…both of us never returned to the Busan beach festival until the last month edition.” Seungcheol said with a smile and Jihoon gulped.  
They were not supposed to talk about that day. About the kiss. About the-

“My grandmother lives in Busan, but I’m from Daegu. Are you from Busan?”

And Jihoon had to smile at that. It was almost the same way Soonyoung had introduced himself before he ‘forced’ him to be friends.

‘Hi! I’m Kwon Soonyoung! I just moved with my grandparents that live here, but I’m from Namyangju. Are you from Busan?”

“Is a nice place to live, though I enjoyed hiking when I was younger, nowadays I prefer going to the beach.” Seungcheol said with a smile still present in his face.

And Jihoon thought maybe this wasn’t that bad. Seungcheol seemed to be the same person he had met at the beach, even when now he knew about him being an heir; and as he had promised, he was keeping the conversation out of the complicated things and feelings that happened in the beach festival. And Jihoon could do that too.

“I definitely prefer the beach, and the food in Busan is the best.” Food was Jihoon’s second favorite conversation topic after music.

And as they kept talking Jihoon felt like he could relax; it was as easy as when they were in the festival. But there was something inside that kept reminding him to mention Mingyu every now and then, just to keep control of the conversation. Because it was so easy to fall into the contagious excitement of Seungcheol’s bright smile when he found about more things they both liked.

And in one moment, they just found themselves smiling at each other in silence. 

“Cheol Hyung?”

A voice said, making Jihoon jump in his seat and Seungcheol drop his spoon to the floor.

“Chan! What are you doing here?!” Seungcheol said, his voice showing his shock.

“I’m here to grab some coffee before returning to my after school classes.” The younger finished his statement with a pout.

Jihoon stayed quiet not sure what to do, or if Seungcheol would even introduced him. But he didn’t have an option, because Chan started.

“I’m Lee Chan, Seungcheol hyung’s younger brother. Nice to meet you.” He said with a bright smile and a bow.

“I’m Lee-“

“Lee Woozi! He is a music producer.” Seungcheol said rapidly trying to call Chan’s attention and Jihoon didn’t know what to think about that.

Was Seungcheol trying to hide him, hide their…’friendship’?

“Oh! Are you working in a project now?” Chan said with a curious expression.

“Yes…but you better go to class now, you don’t want to be late, right Chan?” Seungcheol said standing up to pet the younger's head.

The youngest of the three nodded with a pout, and with a bow to Jihoon and a wave to Seungcheol he left the café.

And then the silence returned, but it had turned awkward, with Jihoon avoiding Seungcheol’s gaze.

“I’m sorry, is just that…”

“You are right, we are just work acquaintances and he shouldn’t get any other ideas.” Jihoon said with a serious expression, but somehow the idea didn’t sit well within him. “Anyway, I have to go.” He said standing up.

“Jihoon, wait! I…”

Jihoon sighed. Maybe this was a mista-

“Can I have your phone number?”


	14. Chapter 14

Even when the first few times Jihoon hadn’t answered, or did it after a few hours, Seungcheol had found out the best way to get the other to answer his messages was to ask about food or music recommendations.

He could see Wonwoo giving him suspicious glances every time he smiled at his phone, but he knew the other would never ask personal questions.

A week after they met at the café, Seungcheol had convinced Jihoon to take him to his favorite restaurant since Seungcheol had chosen the last time. And after bickering about who should pay the bill, they decided that Jihoon would pay and the next time Seungcheol would do it.

And it was definitely a win for the older, because since then, Jihoon had accepted to go to eat with him many more times. Jihoon seemed more relaxed each time and they had even shared a dinner with Chan. 

“Why are you smiling like that?” Jihoon asked him, a spoon full of rice in front of his mouth. 

“I’m just happy….to be here with you.” 

He could see how Jihoon’s expression turned serious and he sighed. Sometimes he forgot that saying things like that would only make the other recoiled. So he decided to change the topic to a familiar one.

“We ordered all this meat, why are you only eating the rice? You should eat more meat if you are going to return to the studio.”

Jihoon ate the rice that was on the spoon and quickly gave a semi-hug to his bowl of rice. 

“I’m paying this time, so I can eat all the rice I want.” He said with a small pout and Seungcheol couldn’t help but smile at that. 

‘You are cute.’ He wanted to say, but he didn’t want the other to leave. 

“Well, more meat for me.” He said using his chopsticks to grab a piece of pork.

And they ate in silence for a moment, listening to the rerun of a music show in the TV and the restaurant ajumma cleaning the other tables.

“You know, the magazine issue for the collaboration has been our bestselling issue of the year till now.” He started, wanting to keep Jihoon’s attention on him.

“Yeah, I bet Seungkwan bought half of the sold copies.” Jihoon said with a smirk making Seungcheol snort.

“His manager actually called me to ask for some copies.” Seungcheol said and Jihoon starting laughing.

It was the same laugh he had heard the first time he saw the other, so pure and full of happiness. And Seungcheol couldn’t believe his luck, to be able to see Jihoon like this was a blessing. But there was a part of Jihoon he really wanted to see. The other talked so passionately about music, but never let Seungcheol visit his studio after the last time they talked there.  
*****************************************************************************************************************************************************

Back when he was in high school and stayed overnight in Soonyoung’s house or the other came to his house, they would end up eating in the middle of the night. It was nice tradition and Jihoon felt like he could sleep better after that. But after he moved to Japan, things started changing. He wasn’t up to eating alone and Mingyu avoided eating late because he wanted to keep his weight due to his modeling career. So Jihoon started with his caffeine addiction.

But after he arrived to Seoul and started working, he had managed to convince Soonyoung to eat with him what he called a ‘late dinner-early breakfast’. So the other had noticed when Jihoon stopped asking him out.

“Should I scold you for returning to your caffeine addiction or are you going to tell me with whom are you eating with?”

Jihoon sighed. He other rarely visited his studio that late, but since he had entered, he had that intense expression in his face making Jihoon feel he was up to something.

“What do you want me to say?” He asked suspecting the other already knew the answer to his question.

“I can’t believe you Lee Jihoon! We already talked about it. You can’t be going on dates with him! What about Mingyu?!”

“He knows about Mingyu. We are just hanging out as…friends.” Jihoon cut the other’s rant.

“As friends? If then, why have you been so secret about him?”

Jihoon didn’t know what to answer to that. 

In the last few weeks he had been eating out with Seungcheol and their shared moments had made him happy. He had debated a lot in his mind before giving the other his phone number, but knowing the other, he would probably be asked again for it. After all, they had been seen each other passing by in the company. And by now, he had gotten to know the other better and he liked to believe they had developed a nice friendship, yes a friendship, as long as they avoided everything that happened before their meeting at the café.

On the other hand, he had tried to keep the messaging at the minimum, because for the moment it was his way of communicating with Mingyu. He was so proud of the other. He had received a signed copy of a European magazine in which Mingyu was in the cover with other Asian models. And the other had been on the TV walking down the runway for a famous designer.

It hurt to admit it, but sometimes he felt like his relationship with Mingyu was better off being a long-distance relationship. As the other progressed in his career, he got the resources to do the things he truly enjoyed, like hanging out with models and photographers, trying fancy clothes and going to parties, while Jihoon still preferred staying in bed watching movies, wearing his comfy clothes, and eating at unconventional hours. Long-gone were the days when both of them stayed in because they had to save money for their tuition and the days they changed their schedules so they could eat breakfast or dinner together. And yet, Jihoon was sure that sleeping in Mingyu’s arms was the safest place on Earth.

“Jihoon?” He could see Soonyoung’s concerned face.

Telling Soonyoung his thoughts about his relationship with Mingyu would only make the other think it was because of Seungcheol.

“Do you want to meet Seungcheol?” Jihoon said with a nervous voice.

“I just want to see your songs.” Soonyoung’s expression turned serious.

“I haven’t written anything about him.” Jihoon said feeling self-conscious.

He had fought his everything not to write every word that crossed his mind when he was with Seungcheol and how his fingers were itching to play the notes in the piano that sounded just like the other's laugh.

Soonyoung stayed silent for a moment and sighed.

“You are just fooling yourself Jihoon. But now I do want to meet him, because I bet he has not introduced you to any of his friends either. I told you he is playing with y-”

“I know his younger brother.” Jihoon couldn’t let the other think badly about Seungcheol. 

Keeping it low-profile was something both of them had silently agreed on.

“I bet Chan would love to meet you, he loves to dance.” Jihoon said with a smile on his face and Soonyoung sighed again.

“I’ll meet them both.” Soonyoung started, putting his hand on Jihoon’s shoulders. “Just don’t let him break your heart.”

And Jihoon let him leave the studio in silence, because he had started thinking that maybe all this denial about his “dates” (as Soonyoung had called them) with Seungcheol was only to protect his heart for when the other finally gets married, because surely he wasn’t going to see Seungcheol again after his wedding.

But his thoughts were suddenly interrupted when his phone vibrated and an incoming message appeared on the screen.

“Are you free now? I really need to talk to you.”


	15. Chapter 15

It had been three months since the first time he stepped in Jihoon’s music studio. And a decision he had once feared now felt like the best decision he had taken.

Meeting Jihoon at the café after that had been pretty awkward. The other wasn’t fully convinced they could actually be some sort of friends, but it was worth the try. If anything, they would be seeing each other for work more frequently as Choi Company got the exclusive for a new boy group that was about to debut.

During their second meeting Jihoon made them talk about their respective partners and how they got to know them. It was a delicate balance between trying to smile while Jihoon told him about Kim Mingyu and trying to stop the feeling that things could have been different if he had been the one the other had met during university.

But as they kept meeting things started to change. Jihoon started to smile more, eating more and singing more. He had such a beautiful voice Seungcheol didn’t want to stop listening. And if Seungcheol hadn't been already captivated by the other, he would definitely have after seeing the other work. The passion Jihoon had for music and when he worked with other musicians was something that let Seungcheol in awe. 

And when the other finally let him return to his music studio alone, Seungcheol had been completely excited. He still felt a bit nervous of being seen. The guilt of being more excited to be there than having dinner with Jeonghan was still present. He had already rejected other dinners with him to be with Jihoon, but he didn’t want to stop this. 

At the beginning his mind had been a mess because he didn’t understand his attachment to a person he barely knew, but now he knew him better. His attraction went beyond being entranced by Jihoon’s beautiful eyes and smile. His knowledge had gone further than knowing his different tastes in music or food, and now he knew his honest thoughts about the industry he worked in, his family and after a few drinks he even mentioned the distance in his relationship with Kim Mingyu.

And Seungcheol had been completely honest with him too. About his doubts over taking a higher position in the company and how he actually got an easier life than the heirs of family businesses that came from several previous generations. He told the other about his grandmother, his mother and about Chan. And Jihoon had even taken his younger brother to Kwon Soonyoung’s dancing studio. Soonyoung didn’t seem very happy with them going out together, but he accepted Chan and the younger seemed happier every time he returned from the studio. And Seungcheol also felt happier after every meeting with Jihoon, even when he had started gaining weight from eating so late. 

But there was something that was still killing Seungcheol inside. He was dying to talk to Jeonghan about their imminent breakup, but the other had stopped showing up at their shared apartment more than often, and if Seungcheol saw him he was in a hurry to leave or was already sleeping. If he called or met him it was all business related, not letting Seungcheol talk about anything else and not even mentioning a word about his absences for dinner. The new hotel had been doing incredibly well with parties, weddings and receiving famous guests that only attracted more influential people. And from what he had heard, the board meeting was ready to accept Jeonghan as the new general manager; while Mr. Yoon had complained to his father about Seungcheol’s lack of support. 

On the other hand, Jihoon had not given him any cue that he was planning to break up with Kim Mingyu, and Seungcheol didn’t say a word about it as he didn’t want to overstep the boundaries they had somehow created. But Seungcheol had to admit it was difficult to stay like this. Because he had to stop himself so many times before he hugged the other when he got excited or kissed him when the other smiled so beautifully, or tell him about all those conflicted emotions Jihoon created in him.

“You are such a bad singer.” Jihoon said with a mischievous smile.

Seungcheol had gotten distracted in his thoughts and stopped following Jihoon’s instructions on how to sing one of his favorite songs. But it was totally worthy after seeing the other smile.

“It’s because I’m getting dizzy with all these neon lights.” He said smirking and Jihoon glared at him.

Jihoon had taken as a personal offense that Seungcheol had once said his studio looked like a nightclub with all the neon lights. 

“Let’s go to eat before you decide to give up on my singing lessons.”

“Fine.” Jihoon said with a serious expression before a small smile appeared on his face. “I saw this small restaurant the other day that we could try. And I thought…”

Seungcheol let the other talk as they left the studio. They had been trying all kinds of small restaurants around the city, so Seungcheol had started feeling weird when he went to a fancy place with his father or the Yoons. They were even banned from one of the restaurants because they started a food fight in which they had to run away from the angry owner. He felt so alive when he was with the other.  
************************************************************************************************************************************************

Jihoon took the subway to his apartment after having dinner with Seungcheol. It had been fun as always and he felt his soul full just like his stomach. 

Jihoon felt surprised that in three months they had found the time to eat together more times than he actually got to eat with Mingyu when he was around. He still refused to acknowledge their meetings as dates and he would stand by that idea no matter what Soonyoung said; but he got to realize that the more times they met, the more he wanted their next meeting to be.

Mingyu had called him after he told him he was free to talk, only to tell him he had been scouted as a model for a European brand and had decided to stay about two more months in Europe than planned. The time difference with him had not helped them with the phone calls and their messages had turned into checking only if the other was eating and sleeping well. He had received a few ‘I miss you’ messages, but he had a hard time before he could send the same message back. It wasn’t like he didn’t miss Mingyu at all; it’s just that he felt content with how his days were passing by, even if he couldn't see the other in person.

And that had put him thinking of when was the last time he had said ‘I love you’ to Mingyu or the last time the other had said those words to him. Even Soonyoung said that when he received a big favor from him, but him and Mingyu had never been like that. 

Had they fallen out of love with time?

Was Jihoon spending his time with Seungcheol just because he didn’t want to feel lonely?

If it was like that, then why did he get so happy when the other smiled? And why did their little bickering make Jihoon think of kissing the other to shut him up?

Because as much Jihoon had wanted to keep his distance and think of the other as Mr. Choi, Seungcheol was always there, telling him about his tastes in movies and furniture, about his mother and the pressure of his father, about his younger brother and his grandmother.

And Jihoon could see how conflicted the other felt about being the heir of Choi Company. It was obvious how much pride Seungcheol had in his job as a manager of his team and how responsible he was when he had to do the field work. 

He had learnt to find the other attractive way beyond his looks and that made him feel- just feel something inside-; but then one sentence could make every happy feeling disappear, even when Chan had talked with all the innocence in the world.

“Jihoon hyung, you definitely need to sing at my hyung and Jeonghan-hyung’s wedding.”

And the reality was back in place. Seungcheol barely mentioned his fiancé, but it didn’t mean he didn’t exist or that he wasn’t a reality in Seungcheol’s life.

And Jihoon hated that he felt somehow betrayed because of that when he had Mingyu.

He hated the papers that now were filled with songs he had written based on his feelings after his meetings with Seungcheol. How the other’s quirks could turn into a verse and his painful past could make a sad melody in the piano.

But what he hated the most was that he couldn’t write any song based on Mingyu.


	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is all in Seungcheol's POV

Seungcheol had mustered all his courage to invite Jihoon to the festival at the Han River. It was like an unspoken agreement that they would only meet for late dinner when nobody they knew could see them. But Seungcheol really wanted to do other things and hopefully the other wouldn’t run away from him because of that. Seeing Jihoon’s face under the festival lights and dancing with him was an image he couldn’t erase from their meeting in Busan.

But before he started worrying about the other’s answer to his message, he needed to talk to Jeonghan. Their romantic relationship was practically inexistent at this point, but he didn’t want to hurt the other if rumors started spreading. He suspected Jeonghan knew about why he was rejecting his dinner invitations, but he wanted to make things clear and finish their relationship; he had let the other ignore him for too long. 

As meeting with Jeonghan had turned even harder than meeting the president, he had scheduled an appointment during working hours. But when he entered the meeting room he saw Seokmin, Jeonghan’s assistant, waiting for him with his usual smile.

“Manager Yoon apologizes for his absence, but he had a last minute meeting with the investors. But I have all the information needed for the new event if you want to discuss it.”

Seungcheol sighed, but stayed. After all, apart from searching for more information about Jeonghan’s whereabouts, the details for the next event at the hotel needed to be discussed.

Jeonghan had been staying at his parent’s house according to the last information he could find from Seokmin and if things didn’t change, Mrs. Yoon was surely going to book the grand salon for their wedding in the next few months.

“Seokmin-ssi, please schedule a meeting with Jeonghan in any free time he has in his schedule. I really need to discuss something important with him.” 

The other nodded and started checking said schedule. 

“Mr. Choi, I will send you the meeting times and you can confirm them.” 

Seungcheol agreed and left the room after they finished discussing the event, excited to find if Jihoon had answered the message. But he hadn’t, and instead he had many messages from Wonwoo asking him to return to the office because they had a problem with one of the clients. Seungcheol frowned and practically ran to his car. But that was only the beginning of a tortuous day. 

He had to solve the problem and he had to reschedule his meetings in order to talk directly with the client. And when he thought things were finally doing well, other problems appeared while the deadline for the new projects seemed to be just around the corner. 

So when he finally arrived to his apartment feeling faint, he just wanted to sleep. But then his phone rang and when he checked the message, a radiant smile appeared on his face making him feel like he could run to Jihoon’s studio just to hug him.

It was a simple “OK”, but for Seungcheol it meant Jihoon was also considering seeing him in another context. And now more than ever, he wanted to be able to talk to Jeonghan so he could see Jihoon without worrying about his engagement. But with the luck he had, Seokmin had suddenly changed the meeting options for the next week instead of the current one, and when Saturday arrived, he decided to focus on Jihoon. 

The other had told him to meet him by the subway station instead of picking him up from his apartment and Seungcheol had accepted. But he was getting more and more nervous as time passed and Jihoon was nowhere to be seen, but his heart almost stopped when he finally saw the other in his jeans and usual hoodie, but his hair was black. And he had to put his hands inside his jacket pockets because he just wanted to hug the other and caress his soft hair.

“Your hair is black now.” He said feeling excited just to see the other.

“Yeah…” Jihoon said not looking at him in the eye and that shy attitude was too much for Seungcheol, so he couldn’t help himself and caressed the other’s hair.

“It looks really nice.” He said softly feeling elated that Jihoon hadn’t moved or removed his hand.

“Let’s go eat something. The recording schedule got messed up and we had to finish today without lunch.” The other said frowning.

Seungcheol nodded and wondered if holding the other’s hand would be too much, but Jihoon was already walking towards the festival area.

The park was full of people, groups of friends, families and couples and that image made Seungcheol realized that they could be seen by all of them. Any worker of Choi Company or Yoon Hotels or Jihoon’s coworkers could see them together. And that realization made Seungcheol stop in his step.

“Seungcheol?” Jihoon had stopped and turned around realizing the other wasn’t following him.

“I…I…” He didn’t want to express his thoughts because surely Jihoon would leave if he realized what was happening.

But Jihoon just seemed confused and without saying a word he walked back until he was in front of him.

“Let’s go.” He said suddenly grabbing Seungcheol by the wrist and pulling him towards the food booths. 

And with that simple skin contact all his hesitation disappeared, and with a smile on his face he followed the other, ready to have a great night.

Jihoon bought almost every food he saw, but didn’t accept the boat ride, so they end up sitting at the riverbank watching the sunset. After talking a bit about the food, the festival and Chan, Jihoon started rambling about his stressful week while he kept eating and Seungcheol stopped trying to look anywhere else than Jihoon.

He wished he could have ended things with Jeonghan before so he could tell the other that he was single. That he was there with honest feelings waiting for him. That he was sure Kim Mingyu would move to Europe to keep working and that Seungcheol’s life would be a misery if Jihoon decided to leave with the other. But until he fixed his own life, he couldn’t ask anything more from the other.

“I like the music they are playing.” Jihoon said, looking at the band on the stage that had attracted many people.

Seungcheol refocused on what was happening at the moment, and if he had managed to make Jihoon come to the festival with him, he wanted to believe he could make the other dance with him.

“Do you want to dance?” He asked with his eyes full of hope.

Jihoon looked back at him in silence for a long time and Seungcheol started feeling nervous. In Jihoon’s eyes he could see more than his own reflection. There were so many things the other was thinking but wasn’t saying.

“Just one song and then I’ll leave.” 

Jihoon had spoken with such soft voice Seungcheol wasn’t sure if he had heard correctly.

“Jihoon, what-.” But the other was already standing up with his back facing the older.

Seungcheol wasn’t sure what to think. Jihoon had never been so easy to persuade, but he had accepted to come with him to the festival without questions, had grabbed his wrist and had accepted to dance; but at the same time it felt like his mind was far away.

“I like this song.” Jihoon said close to his ear, his hand on Seungcheol’s shoulder so the other was leaning a bit downwards.

They were now surrounded by many people that were dancing and Seungcheol felt a bit dizzy. Jihoon was showing his beautiful smile and the lights made him glow in an ethereal image that Seungcheol was sure would treasure till the end. They started swaying to the music and Jihoon followed every chant requested by the main vocalist and he seemed to be having the time of his life. He was the embodiment of happiness and Seungcheol decided to just follow his heart.

With his eyes closed he felt everything, the cheers of the crowd, the band playing, the smooth skin of Jihoon’s cheek and the softness of the other’s lips.


	17. Chapter 17

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is all in Jihoon's POV

What happened was definitely not what Jihoon was expecting. Seungcheol’s kiss was just as he remembered and he panicked after he realized he wanted more. But when the kiss ended and Seungcheol showed his beautiful smile Jihoon couldn’t help but smile back.

And in that moment he decided not to care if he was making a mistake, he wanted to enjoy the moment. It didn’t matter anymore if Seungcheol was engaged to someone else or if he was in a relationship. He felt crazy with excitement with the music like magic spell over both of them, and the only thing he could see at the moment was Seungcheol. He felt intoxicated because this was something that he had never felt before, and even if it was scary, he decided to enjoy it.

So he decided to forget his ‘one song’ idea and just kept dancing with the other. It was a new feeling to just enjoy without worrying about the future and just to feel without needing an explanation. And with Seungcheol’s hands on his waist and his on the other’s neck and hair, his only wish was for the other to feel the same way as he was feeling. And in his mind and heart many more songs started developing.

When he had arrived to the subway station and Seungcheol had seemed so happy to see him and had caressed his hair, Jihoon was still hesitating if he should stay. But he was really hungry, so he guessed it was better to enjoy the food; after all, it would be just like going out with Soonyoung. But as they kept talking he realized things would never be that simple with Seungcheol, and being the center of the other’s attention made him flustered. 

But when they stood near the stage surrounded by the dancing crowd, Jihoon decided that it was in his hands to make this outing awkward or enjoyable, so he focused on enjoying the music. What he wasn’t expecting was to suddenly feel Seungcheol’s hand on his face and then his lips.

“Jihoon?” He could feel Seungcheol caressing his waist returning him to reality. “The band is leaving; do you want to go eat something?”

Jihoon checked the time and it was 11pm, they usually met from that hour onwards, but this time Jihoon knew that if he stayed with the other things would escalate more than just a kiss, if Seungcheol’s lips on his neck were any indication. 

“I need to return home… I have to…mmm…finish some songs.” He took a step back and bit his lip knowing that the other had noticed his excuse.

Because as much as he had enjoyed the festival with the other, with the music gone, all the complicated thoughts started appearing again. And if he had read Mingyu’s last message right, the other was going to return in three days and Jihoon was desperate to talk to him. And even if Seungcheol avoided talking about it, the reality was that he was engaged and if Jihoon could turn crazy just because of a kiss he didn’t want to think what would happen if they took things further. 

And yet, he still accepted Seungcheol’s offer to drive him home.

During the ride he felt really nervous, he wanted to tell the other he was thinking of breaking up with Mingyu, but not because of him, but because he had realized he was no longer in love with Mingyu. And because he didn’t want Seungcheol to think he was going to start a hidden relationship after his marriage, he wanted to give a closure to all of this.

He turned to look at the other, but Seungcheol seemed to be in deep thought too, so he stayed quiet enjoying the light rain that had started falling.

“Jihoon, we are here.” He felt the other caressing his hand and he blinked.

He hadn’t realized he had fallen asleep, but he was grateful that he had avoided the awkward ride. 

“See you tomorrow?” Seungcheol asked with his eyes full of hope, but Jihoon had already decided he would wait for Mingyu before he met Seungcheol again. If he was going to be honest about his feelings, he needed to talk to Mingyu first and then discuss with Seungcheol about his situation. 

“I’ll be busy; I’ll let you know when we can meet.” He said rapidly turning his face away from Seungcheol.

He heard the other sigh before he felt it.

With a kiss to his cheek Seungcheol said. “Goodnight Jihoon.” 

And before he could make a bigger mistake Jihoon got out of the car and waved goodbye before entering his apartment building.

He let out a big sigh when he finally entered his apartment and saw his reflection in the mirror. It had been a conscious decision to dye his hair black again. His hair was black when he met Seungcheol for the first time when he was a teenager and his hair was black when he first met Mingyu back at the university. He wanted to believe dyeing it black again would allow him a new beginning.

And as he kept staring at his reflection in the mirror he touched his cheek where Seungcheol had just kissed him. Then his lips where the other had kissed him before and finally his hand that other had caressed softly. And before he noticed, he was sitting inside his home music studio, headphones on his ears and papers full of lyrics. He felt the same euphoria as when he was dancing with Seungcheol, his kisses and his smile and the possibility of something more between them.

And he didn’t stop until he poured all of his feelings on songs without caring about the time; and when he finally checked it was already 5 am and he hadn’t eaten anything or slept a bit. So he walked to the kitchen feeling like a zombie, ready to make some ramen and then finally going to sleep.

When he woke up it was already afternoon and without caring about his phone, he started watching a movie in the TV while he ate more ramen and then went to sleep. He felt like he needed to sleep more if he was going to work the next day.

And he was grateful his phone hadn’t died in the middle of the night and his alarm still rang, but because he stayed in bed longer than needed, he had to run if he didn’t want to be late to his meeting with Bumzu to confirm the songs for Seungkwan’s new album.

But as he was about to leave, he realized he didn’t know where his wallet was and he started looking for it fanatically. He searched in his room, the kitchen, the living room and finally in his home music studio, only to find it there below a few of his music papers. He grabbed the wallet, but before he turned to leave, he read a few of the lyrics. Those were his real feelings, the ones he had felt deeply in his soul after he departed from Seungcheol. And for a moment he thought of bringing one of them to the meeting, but then he realized that he couldn’t. Just like the first song he wrote about the other, if anyone was going to read those lyrics or hear those songs it would be Seungcheol. 

So he just left the studio leaving the door open, and ran out of the apartment when his poorly charged phone started ringing with a call from Bumzu. And even when he was late to the meeting, he was able to confirm the track list for the album to the executives and managers and spent the rest of his day checking other half composed songs with other producers.

He got so busy that he was planning to sleep as soon as he arrived to his apartment, but as soon as he opened the front door, he noticed the shoes and the luggage in the living room. Mingyu was back.


	18. Chapter 18

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is all in Seungcheol's POV

Seungcheol arrived to his apartment with a small smile on his face. Jihoon’s smile was life changing and the fact that it had been directed towards him was such an amazing thing. But he was still feeling bittersweet, because as soon as they stopped dancing, Jihoon started behaving cold and Seungcheol was scared Jihoon was putting a wall between them again. 

But he still believed in the other and hopefully he would receive a message saying Jihoon wanted to eat dinner soon. And by that time he wanted to be sure things with Jeonghan would be over in the best way possible. The fact that Mr. Yoon was obviously annoyed by his presence in his house would not stop Seungcheol this time, and he would go look for Jeonghan and talk to him even if the other tried to avoid him again. 

He felt nervous because he was sure things would not be easy after the breakup. After being with Jeonghan for so long, many things were intertwined in their lives beyond their romantic relationship; the business relationship, their mutual friends, their parents’ social relationship. But what he was really scared of was Jeonghan’s hate, he had been one of his closest friends before they started dating and it would really hurt to see the other treating him like he never existed.

He wasn’t sure how long it had been since he sat on his sofa with his head hanging low and hurting from thinking of all the possible ways his conversation with Jeonghan could go, when the front door of his apartment opened, revealing a mortified Jeonghan.

Seungcheol looked up surprised because it had been a couple of weeks since the last time he saw him in the apartment. 

“Jeong-.” He started, but he was suddenly interrupted by the other.

“You know I never wanted to rush things, but we need to get married now.” Jeonghan said with a serious expression.

Seungcheol opened his mouth, but no words were said. He was in shock and all his thoughts were mixed up. This was a complete reverse from what he was thinking of saying to the other.

Jeonghan had started pacing back and forth in the living room not looking at him, but with his fists tightly shut. 

“I can’t believe he is doing this to me, Seungcheol.” The other started talking again, not bothering to ask for a reply to his last statement. “I thought it was a business dinner and suddenly I was there in a date with a Japanese investor that had a ring ready. My father-.”

“What are you talking about?!” Seungcheol wasn’t even sure how he had managed to say those words when he was still feeling in shock and more confused than ever.

“That we should get married now, because apparently my father does not understand that we are engaged! I don’t care about a big wedding….I just want…to be with you.” Jeonghan said the last words looking at him deeply and Seungcheol could hear the desperation in his voice. 

And Seungcheol gulped, because he was about to crush any hope that their relationship could be saved.

“Jeonghan, I…actually I wanted to talk you because…” He took a deep breath and followed, not daring to look back at the other. “I’m sorry, I’m really sorry, but I can’t. I met-.”

He heard a ‘tsk’ sound making him look up and Jeonghan’s smirking face greeted him.

“Do you really think I don’t know? I have been really busy, but I’m not stupid.” Jeonghan’s eyes remained focused on Seungcheol, but his lips started quivering. 

“It’s fun, isn’t it? To be with a musician. It’s all exciting to hear him singing and playing music for you, feels like a magical moment.” He continued with his expression turning bitter. “But it will not last. He doesn’t care about his relationship or about you. He will not stay by your side or fight for you.”

Seungcheol felt like every sentence the other said was stabbing his chest. Like every special moment he thought he had shared with Jihoon was getting destroyed. 

“Jeonghan, I-.”

“I told you I didn’t care what you did, I would fix it. And now I’m doing that! Because I always let you do whatever you wanted no matter the consequences. But I know this is a mistake! He will break your heart Seungcheol!...so please….please, marry me.” Jeonghan had started crying at this point, mixing shouting and sobbing leaving Seungcheol stunned. 

But after a moment of just listening to Jeonghan’s sobs, Seungcheol stood up and hugged the other.

“Jeonghan, please calm down. I’m really sorry that things had turned out like this. I’m really sorry that I can’t marry you, the last thing I ever wanted was to hurt you like this, but I can’t be with you anymore. I-.” Seungcheol could feel the tears pooling in his eyes.

“Shut up!” Jeonghan pushed him away, anger showing in his face. “When we started dating I never thought I will have to fight with my father because you. I thought he would acknowledge you and this time things would be okay. But they are not! Because it’s been a long time since he told me I should break up with you and I fought with him because of that. But you don’t care! You don’t care about all the sacrifices I made for this relationship and you are leaving me for a fake dream.” Jeonghan was fully crying while he hit Seungcheol’s chest with his fists softly.

And Seungcheol felt his heart tearing apart because the last time he had seen Jeonghan crying that much was a long time ago. It hurt him to know he was the reason of the other’s tears and he wished things were different. He hated that they had to reach this point for Jeonghan to express his deepest thoughts. But at the same time he felt anger rising in his chest, because Jeonghan’s father was the main topic once again and because it seemed Jeonghan didn’t know of all those times Seungcheol had to shut his mouth up when he was being ridiculed by Mr. Yoon in front of his own father, and how he fought the people that said he was only using Jeonghan to make the Choi Company grow.

“Jeonghan, please don’t say it like that. I told you before that you didn’t have to fight alone, that I was also there to fight together for our relationship.” Seungcheol said feeling wronged. 

“No…I just needed you to stay by my side patiently, just like I have been waiting for you to accept your position in your company and then things will be okay.” Jeonghan said wiping away his tears and walking towards the front door.

“Jeonghan, you know that’s not really what I want…” Seungcheol started saying, feeling confused and afraid the other would leave.

But Jeonghan just stood facing the wall beside the door, with his fists tightly shut against it and started mumbling words. 

“Jeonghan…?” Seungcheol called his name softly when the other remained in the position for a few minutes. He had never seen the other act like that, he was feeling really concerned at this point. 

He was about to approach the other when he was surprised by his now understandable words. 

“If you could only do what I’m asking…. If you could return with me…then things would be okay…I came here for you…” Jeonghan continued still facing the wall.

Seungcheol stood in his place looking at the other in silence. It felt like Jeonghan was not even talking to him anymore.

“I fought with my father…” 

Seungcheol sighed as he heard the other say those words. He wished he had been able to show Jeonghan he could also fight for their relationship in front of his father, but the other never gave him the chance.

“Jeonghan…” He said softly and started walking towards the other.

Jeonghan started mumbling words again and Seungcheol wasn’t sure if he should touch his shoulder, afraid of the other’s reaction. It was like the other was a ticking bomb ready to explode. 

“I fought with him for us…” Jeonghan said not turning around, but Seungcheol knew he was crying again.

“Jeonghan, I’m sorry that you feel like that.” Seungcheol said feeling frustrated. “But this is not why-.”

“I fought with my father for us, Jisoo!” Jeonghan shouted turning around to face him with new tears falling over his cheeks.

And Seungcheol took a step back looking at him with his eyes wide open in shock. 

He heard Jeonghan gasp before the other moved to the door trying to leave. But Seungcheol didn’t let him go and hugged him from behind, feeling the other trembling in his arms. Jeonghan kept trying to escape, but Seungcheol turned him around and hugged him against his chest. Jeonghan was weeping and Seungcheol just pressed him harder against his chest telling him soothing words. 

The other felt so small against him and his tears were all over his shirt, but Seungcheol didn’t mind. It was like Jeonghan was finally letting go of the pain. A pain that he had been carrying for a long time and that went beyond his breakup with Seungcheol. 

Because Seungcheol remembered him, even when he hadn’t said his name or talked about him for many years.

Jisoo…Hong Jisoo…

The person Jeonghan had introduced as “the love of his life” when they first met at 17 years old.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for the kudos ♥️


	19. Chapter 19

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is all in Jeonghan's POV, a bit of his backstory.

Jeonghan opened his eyes slowly and sighed. Just by looking at the ceiling, he noticed he wasn’t at his father’s house. He moved his face to the side, only to find out he was alone in the bed. He looked to the other side, finding his cellphone and wallet on the nightstand and he sighed again. The apartment was silent and he wasn’t sure if he wanted to meet Seungcheol outside of the room. 

The last thing he could remember was crying in Seungcheol’s arms. He must have looked pathetic crying in the arms of the man that had just broken up their engagement and had fallen for someone else. And yet, Jeonghan tears were not only because of him, but for the person that had hurt him more than anyone had. Someone that Jeonghan had tried to erase from his mind and heart, but couldn’t even bury deep enough to stop hurting after all these years. He hadn’t pronounced his full name in years. He had even forbidden Seungcheol from saying it. 

“Hong Jisoo….” He said barely audible as he looked at his reflection in the bathroom mirror.

He washed his face, hating how swollen his eyes looked and the dried tears on his cheeks. He felt all kind of mixed emotions, because the last time he had cried that much was because of Jisoo years ago.

However, it wasn’t like he wasn’t mad with Seungcheol or hurt by his actions. He couldn’t stop the feeling of betrayal after knowing Seungcheol had decided to spend his time and share his affection with someone else instead of him. Nonetheless, after seeing Seungcheol’s expression when he pronounced Jisoo’s name, he knew the other had noticed he had never been completely honest with him all these years.

That’s why even when Jeonghan wanted to hate Seungcheol for falling for someone else, he also felt sorry for the feelings he had kept for Jisoo that didn’t allow him to love Seungcheol as he deserved it. Because Seungcheol’s feelings had been honest when they started dating and with time Jeonghan had turned selfish thinking he had the other for good and had prioritized his job.

Jeonghan knew that since day one of their relationship Seungcheol had given him 100% of his heart, but even with all the love he had developed for the other, Seungcheol hadn’t been able to erase Jisoo’s memory from his heart. 

But still, he wanted to protect Seungcheol, he didn’t deserve to get hurt like he had. Because heirs had different lives and reality than other people, no matter what dramas showed. For a normal person, it would be difficult to deal with that and mostly for a free spirited person, like a musician.

And he had learned that in the hard way; because Jisoo had chosen his dream to be a musician over him, over their future together.

They had met when Jeonghan had just turned fifteen and had decided he wanted to learn how to play guitar. He went to a music academy full of other heirs and children of famous people, but Jisoo was there as a prodigy. He got a scholarship there and was the best in his class. His mother was a high school teacher and his father was a journalist and they had moved back to Korea to take care of Jisoo’s grandmother. 

Jeonghan’s excitement for his guitar lessons had disappeared when he realized he was really bad at it, but when the option to get help from Jisoo arrived, things changed completely. Jeonghan had been raised surrounded by rich people and normally he wouldn’t be too fond of middle class people, but Jisoo was always different. Jeonghan had always been a mischievous kid, but Jisoo instead of getting mad, always gave him a sweet smile that disarmed Jeonghan. 

Eventually, he stopped going to the academy to learn, instead he stayed there listening to Jisoo singing and playing guitar or letting the other talk about his hometown. Jeonghan had been in Los Angeles before, but listening to Jisoo’s stories about his childhood there, made him want to visit it again and see the place as a local and not as a rich tourist. 

Their friendship developed there, between the walls of the music academy, not being known by any of Jeonghan’s friends. And even when rumors started spreading about the reasons why Jisoo wanted to spend time with him, Jeonghan never cared, because the other never asked for anything else than his company. And he was happy, really happy to be able to talk with someone that wasn’t under the same pressure as him and that found bliss in simple things. He felt like he was in a dream every time he listened to Jisoo’s sweet voice singing his favorite songs.

A year later when they had moved their friendship outside the music academy and were walking down near Jisoo’s house, a neighborhood Jeonghan had never knew existed, the first snow of the year started falling and Jeonghan received his first kiss.

It was all happiness for him when they were together, but his father was completely opposed to their relationship. Jeonghan would tell his boyfriend that the reason of his father’s opposition was that he was afraid Jisoo would distract him from his studies or that he was worried the other put him in danger by taking Jeonghan to unsafe places. But he never said out loud that the reason was that Jisoo was a middle-class person. That’s why Jeonghan never wanted Jisoo to meet his parents or visit his house, he didn’t want the other to listen to his father’s words and get hurt by them.

He knew Jisoo was not only good at music, but at academics too, so he would surely enter a good university and Jeonghan would make sure they would work together in the management of the hotels. But his father kept pushing them apart and pressuring him, so Jeonghan decided to rebel and found his enjoyment in being a problematic kid at school. Jisoo had tried to discourage him, but with him studying in another school, he couldn’t stop his actions.

But with that things got more complicated and Jeonghan would avoid being at home and stayed with Jisoo. His friends were lukewarm in his support of their relationship, just like his mother, because they thought his relationship wouldn’t last. But then he met Seungcheol, an heir of a growing business, a new student fresh from Daegu. 

Seungcheol wasn’t like any of his friends and Jeonghan decided to shelter him from all the harshness that the other heirs could put him through. Seungcheol was a good friend and totally supported him and Jisoo, even when he was usually the target of their jokes. And with his support, he calmed his rebellious acts and decided to focus on enjoying his friendship and his relationship.

He thought things couldn’t be better when he convinced Jisoo to apply for the same university and the three of them started going to classes together. University was a blast; he had his own place and barely visited his father’s house, his only responsibilities were getting good grades and attending whatever social event his family was invited to. He was forbidden from taking Jisoo, so he convinced Seungcheol to go with him most of the time, just like when they were in high school.

Years passed, but his father was still against them, so Jeonghan decided that he would prove to him that Jisoo could totally turn into an adequate partner for an heir, by graduating in business and becoming a manager. So he helped Jisoo in his studies and they would sneak in many of the Yoon hotels, so they could learn more about the business and well, other things too.

Jisoo made him happy and he thought he did the same for the other, so he was really shocked when the other told him he would be going to New York as an exchange student for a semester. But Jeonghan couldn’t say no, because that experience surely would be appreciated by his father and maybe when he returned, Jeonghan could finally introduced him as his boyfriend in the hotel events without being criticized or having Jisoo stopped by the entrance for not being in the guest list.

Four months Jeonghan waited for him, receiving calls and messages, believing their relationship would last after being together for almost five years, but when Jisoo suddenly stopped communicating with him, Jeonghan started worrying. His parents said he was okay, that they had received a call from him a few days ago, but Jeonghan hadn’t been able to reach him for almost two weeks. So he decided to take action and booked the first flight to New York he could find.   
But things over there were not like Jeonghan expected. 

“Hi…Mmmm…You must be Jeonghan, right?” The guy that Jisoo had once introduced as his roommate greeted him when he opened the door.

Jeonghan nodded, feeling a bit overwhelmed by the time difference and the rush of looking for Jisoo’s dorm.

“Is Jisoo…mmm..Joshua here?” He asked with voice full of worry.

“Oh, I thought he told you….”Jeonghan looked at the other confused. “He quit uni and moved to L.A., and oh, he changed his phone number. Let me get it for you.” He other said entering the room and leaving the door opened, revealing what once used to be Jisoo’s bed that was now empty.

And after receiving the phone number and the name of a club in which Jisoo’s band played, he booked a flight to L.A., ready to receive some answers as Jisoo wouldn’t even answer his calls in his new phone.

And he got even more shocked in Los Angeles, because the club was nothing like he expected. He was used to clubbing in fancy places and staying in the VIP area, but this seemed to be an underground club full of people with atrocious clothes. He received pointed looks from the clubbers as soon as he entered the place, but it seemed like it was his only chance to see Jisoo.

And he saw him there with his band playing on stage. Long gone were his usual wool sweaters and sneakers, instead he was wearing a leather jacket and combat boots. He was playing his guitar skillfully as always and had a smile on his face. The music was just like the type Jisoo liked and Jeonghan hated, but he still stayed through all the show watching his boyfriend playing.

And he almost missed him when the band went down the stage as many fans surrounded them. But then Jisoo turned around and saw him, and he opened his arms expecting Jeonghan’s hug. 

“Jeonghan! Can’t believe you are here!” Jisoo said smiling and Jeonghan kissed him. 

He had so many questions in his mind, but knowing he was finally in the other’s embrace he couldn’t help himself.

“I missed you. And you suddenly stopped contacting me, I got worried.” Jeonghan said caressing the other’s face.

“Mmm..yeah…I got a change of plans…” Jisoo started, but then his band members called him and he just pulled Jeonghan with him to the backstage. In there he got to know the other members and they all seemed like good people, but he really wanted to have a moment alone with Jisoo.

‘Why did you quit university in New York? , ‘Do your parents know?, ‘Until when you are staying here?’ ‘Why didn’t you tell me?’

Jeonghan kept asking those questions while he felt trapped in the tiny apartment Jisoo shared with his band members. The other seemed to be avoiding any conversation about returning to Korea and if he was not practicing with the band, he would always distract Jeonghan with kisses and more. 

“Jisoo, it’s been two weeks already. We need to return so I can take my finals.” Jeonghan said lying in bed with Jisoo’s arms around his waist. 

“Do you really need to go? We will play in a bigger venue in three days and maybe we can finally be scouted by a record label.” The other said kissing his head.

“Jisoo, you can’t keep living like this, what about university?” Jeonghan asked confused, this wasn’t in their well-crafted plans. 

“Well…Maybe you can transfer here.” Jisoo said yawning.

Jeonghan just stayed silent looking at the other’s closed eyes. It was like they were having two different conversations. Jisoo never included himself in the idea of returning to Korea or returning to university. This wasn’t like him, Jisoo had agreed in studying business and then working together in the hotel management after they graduated.

How could he deal with his parents if he told them that his boyfriend had suddenly decided to drop university and was playing in music clubs? He already had a hard time avoiding his parents’ calls and he had just let Seungcheol know he was doing okay. But he wasn’t even sure of that, because as much as he loved spending time with Jisoo, the other’s apartment and neighborhood were horrible and he felt like an outcast every time he accompanied the band to their gigs.

“Jisoo, we really need to talk.” He practically begged when they arrived to the backstage.

But Jisoo just hugged him and then lifted him up laughing as his other friends shouted in excitement. They had finished their presentation and the response from the crowd had been outstanding, but Jeonghan had only been focused on how to finally confront Jisoo.

So when the band decided to go eat something, Jeonghan grabbed Jisoo’s arm and forced him to stay. The tension between them had been growing in the last few days and even when Jeonghan had insisted, Jisoo had refused to talk. 

“Jisoo, I need to return, but I will help you with the paperwork so you can start the next semester without problems.” 

“What? Jeonghan I’m not going back. I’m sure we will be scouted after this gig, did you see the crowd? They were going crazy!” Jisoo said finishing with a big smile.

“Then what about us? What about our plans?” Jeonghan said feeling betrayed.

“We can change our plans. Aren’t you happy here with me? You can go to university here if you want, or you can do whatever you want. Let’s forget about your father -.”

“I can’t do that. I can’t just drop everything and stay in your crappy apartment.” Jeonghan said anger showing in his face.

“I know it’s not your ideal house, after all you are a rich kid, but you have to believe in me. I know my band can make it!”’

Jeonghan heard his words, but his mind got stuck in the words ‘rich kid’. Jisoo had never said anything remotely similar to that and even when he knew Jeonghan could spend as much as he wanted, Jisoo would also invite him to the movies and to eat. He never made Jeonghan felt just like a ‘rich kid’.

“Jeonghan? Are you listening to me? This is my dream, not being a boring manager.” Jeonghan was even more shocked after listening to those words.

“But-but we agreed on working together in the Yoon hotels after graduation. You promised me, Jisoo. And you don’t have to drop music completely; you can still play as a hobby or in the events. Yes, the events will be a good place to show others your talent. You were doing so well in your classes; you don’t want to waste your effort, right? ” Jeonghan knew he sounded desperate.

“I didn’t have a choice before, but now I do. You know my parents pressured me to go to university. And you…you did it too.” Jisoo finished looking down.

“I did it because that’s the only chance for us to be accepted! You know my parents-.” Jeonghan started, but got shocked when Jisoo suddenly cut him.

“Really Jeonghan?! You never dared to introduce me properly to your parents! Were you waiting for me to turn into the person your father was expecting so I could finally eat dinner with them?!”

Jeonghan didn’t know what to say after listening to the other’s words. Jisoo had never shouted at him before and after avoiding talking about the university and returning to Korea for weeks, the other seemed to be letting all out in rage. 

“Jisoo no, just listen to me….I-.”

“I listened to you all these years. Now listen to me!”

Jeonghan listened to the other talking about how bad he felt when he took Seungcheol to the events instead of him. How Jeonghan’s other friends would left him out of their conversations. How he always felt like he wasn’t enough and how he was tired of pretending everything was okay when it was not. And he was tired of following Jeonghan’s instructions; because all his efforts to fit in would only be valid if he received Mr. Yoon’s approval, while Jeonghan just kept enjoying his life as a rich kid.

“It’s like he is the only one that matters, not me, not my opinion! Like I’m a shame and you will never dare to stand proud beside me until I can fit your lifestyle. I have been doing all these things for you, but it’s like you can’t even dare to fight for us.”

Jeonghan could feel the tears falling in his cheeks while listening to the other’s words.

“When we return, my father-.”

“Just stop! I’m tired of trying to prove myself to him, tired of fighting alone for this…If you are planning to return; I’m giving up on us.” Jisoo said glaring at him.

Jeonghan opened his mouth so say something, but he couldn’t find the words. 

Jisoo stayed silent for a moment too, before he turned around and walked towards the door.

Jeonghan looked at him as more tears fell from his eyes, but no words left his mouth, even when there were so many things he wanted to say like,

‘I came here for you’, ‘please return with me’, ‘say things will be okay’

‘I love you’

“Goodbye Jeonghan.” Jisoo said with a serious tone and barely looking at him over his shoulder.

He opened the door and the noise from the club entered the backstage room waking up Jeonghan from his stupor and just then, the words he should have said to Jisoo’s face left his mouth. 

“I have been fighting too…I fought with my father for us, Jisoo.” Jeonghan said softly, but the door was already closed.


	20. Chapter 20

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is all in Mingyu's POV.

Mingyu sighed as soon as he entered the apartment. His manager had confused the dates and he had had to rush to the airport so he wouldn’t miss his flight, and he end up arriving to Korea a day prior to the date he told Jihoon.

He took off his shoes and carried his suitcase to the living room. He wasn’t sure if he should unpack or just rest, he was just a tiny bit obsessed with keeping things clean and organized, but he felt tired too. He looked around and found that the apartment was actually cleaner than expected and when he arrived to the kitchen it seemed that Jihoon had used the minimum so he wouldn’t have to clean so much.

He sighed again.

Jihoon have changed a lot since the last time they said goodbye to each other in Japan. He was used to being spoiled by Mingyu in terms of food and the tallest was usually the one cleaning and washing. But after that, Jihoon would give him a massage and then they would make out in every room of the apartment Mingyu had just cleaned.

But after a year of being away from the other, Jihoon seemed to be doing great on his own. He had never been a fan of cooking, but Mingyu knew Jihoon had been cooking at home when they couldn’t eat together. Sometimes the other would even leave some food for Mingyu to eat in the refrigerator. He had also developed a routine for washing his clothes and was really conscious of cleaning the kitchen and kitchen tools before going to sleep. Mingyu felt like the other didn’t need him anymore to take care of him.

And things went beyond that. He couldn’t remember the last time he had given the other a piggy back ride home or took crazy pictures of their dates.

At one point they had stopped doing those things and he thought it may be normal since they have matured and were more focused on their careers. But they had been so focused on working that their relationship had lost its spark as time passed by.

He had accepted the modeling project in Europe because it was a dream of his and Jihoon understood that and supported him. But maybe it had been a mistake. After a year of being away from each other and with Jihoon only a couple of months back in Korea, it was probably the worst decision Mingyu could have taken.

He had noticed the other was acting weird, leaving the party where he had introduced him to his friends without a word or staring into space and sighing more than he ever did in Japan. That was why Mingyu had come up with the idea of moving back to Japan, or for at least Jihoon to move back while he was away. Having Jihoon there waiting for him gave him a feeling of normality, something that had happened many times before when he had shorter trips. But then he had seen tears in Jihoon’s eyes and he didn’t want the other to feel he wasn’t welcome back to Mingyu’s side or that he didn’t appreciate his decision of leaving everything in Japan to move to Korea with him, so he let the topic drop and left as planned.

And he should have returned after the first month, before their distance grew even more. But he hadn’t realized that at the moment, he had been too excited with the idea of traveling around Europe and meeting famous designers and photographers. And Jihoon had just accepted it all. They have always been very supportive to each other’s dreams, even when it seemed that the things they liked had become more and more distant.

And Mingyu had gotten used to their minimum communication, believing that the other was too busy or stressed out. Jihoon would always ignore the world and stay in his music studio when that happened. At least the other was letting him know he was eating and sleeping well. Mingyu had stopped expecting an ‘I miss you’ message back; it wasn’t Jihoon-like to say things like that.

Still he wanted to believe things would get better as his returning date got closer, but then the rumors started. One of his model friends let him know that models that were associated to Choi Company had seeing Jihoon together with Mr. Choi Seungcheol. He had wanted to ask, but Jihoon had already told him he was composing for singers that would be featured in Choi Company’s magazine. So he tried not to worry as his friend told him again that Mr. Choi seemed to be really close to Jihoon. But just a couple of days ago, another model that he had introduced Jihoon to, sent him a message telling him he was sure he had seen Jihoon kissing another guy at the Han River Festival. And Mingyu didn’t know what to think of that.

But the rush of finishing his modeling project and returning to Korea had taken all his time. And during the flight back his manager had tired him out by letting him know all about other projects that he had in Korea in case he decided to reject the offer to return to Europe. But now, in the silence of his apartment, all the thoughts about Jihoon and Jihoon kissing someone else had started to invade his mind.

He wanted to believe the other model had seen wrong, that there had to be a rational explanation. That Jihoon probably had gone there with Soonyoung and the other was being clingy as always. That even if Jihoon had gotten closer to the heir of Choi Company, he wouldn’t be going to festivals with him or kissing him. After all Jihoon was his boyfriend and Mr. Choi was engaged, Jihoon wouldn’t do that to him.

But then his eyes traveled to the open door of Jihoon’s home music studio. Jihoon had promised to write him a song and Mingyu was sure it would enlighten him of where their relationship was. He had read and listened all types of songs coming from Jihoon, the other was better at expressing himself through songs and if he was angry or sad, or in love…his lyrics would show it.

So he entered the music studio, a small smile appearing on his face as soon as he saw the disorganized desk. When Jihoon had his ‘write-compose marathon’, he wouldn’t care about organizing his music sheets. He had those episodes often back in university for days and he wouldn’t know which song he wrote first or on which day. That’s why Mingyu had practically forced him to keep order by writing in the top of the page the date and number so he wouldn’t turn crazy when it was his presentation day.

And Jihoon had taken that advice by heart and Mingyu’s smile grew a bit more when he noticed the numbers on top of every music sheet. They all had the same date as expected of the ‘write-compose marathon’, but Mingyu didn’t know why his hands started trembling when he reached out to grab the music sheets.

He wanted to believe that at least one, if not all them were dedicated to him. Jihoon would normally take all his songs that were made for work to his music studio in the company; he would only keep the ones he considered too personal to share.

So Mingyu took a deep breath before he started reading.

_“The party ends, everyone goes home_

_I go with your face stuck in my soul_

_And without really knowing you, I already begin to miss you_

_It seems that I got used to you in a single day_

_That I have been missing you as if I've known you for years_

_It seems that in just one dance I gave you my life_

_It seems that the feeling won over the rules that existed"_

Mingyu let all the air out of his lungs. He didn’t know he had stopped breathing while reading the lyrics and he tried to think that was the reason his chest felt so tight. Jihoon hated parties and he only danced when he was completely drunk. And Jihoon had once told him that if they hadn’t been roommates back in university they would probably have never gotten close. That he didn’t believe in love at first sight.

He grabbed the next music sheet and tried to calm his racing heart.

“_I can’t say the words to express that I like you_

_I do not know how to explain to you, _

_That you make me feel as if it was summer and winter did not exist_

_As if everything stops_

_And with that smile, that changes life, you looked over here”_

Mingyu felt the tears pooling in his eyes. In one of the songs Jihoon had written for him, he compared Mingyu to spring and how his smile was like a blooming flower. Not like summer…not a life changing smile.

His hands were still trembling when he grabbed the next music sheet.

_“You know that I have little to give you _

_I would like for it to be the world although it can’t be_

_But I can fill your ears with all my songs_

_They are not much, but I made them full of illusions_

_And if your heart does not see my offer_

_I beg you do not see it with indifference, _

_Patience, that my love is like moonlight,_

_Soft, but lightens up the corners where your soul is dark_

_If you want me, tell me. Tell me”_

Mingyu’s tears were running down his cheeks as he crumpled the music sheet. He didn’t want to believe Jihoon was offering his songs-his love- to someone else. He must be mistaken. Jihoon was probably waiting for him, waiting for Mingyu to tell him that no matter the distance, his feelings haven’t changed.

He sat down on the chair in front of the desk and took a deep breath. He wiped away his tears and took the music sheet that seemed to be a fully written song.

_“I want to tell you that I'm thinking of making a mistake_

_I'm going to tell you something that I can’t keep anymore_

_I already tried, but I can’t stand it anymore_

_I know that there is another person who takes care of your heart_

_I have one too, but I've lost my mind_

_I'll tell you_

_I confess that this has never happened to me before_

_And I confess that I don’t want to hurt anyone_

_But it’s been a long time since lost myself in your eyes_

_I want to dance with you until you fall in love_

_And even if we sow our dreams based on mistakes_

_I promise you love, that love will grow_

_Because flowers come after every winter”_

Mingyu bit his lower lip as tears started falling again. He couldn’t deny things anymore. He felt hurt, angry and lost.

How come Jihoon had developed such feelings for a person in such a short time? Feelings that were so strong he didn’t mind both of them were in relationship. He even acknowledged it was a mistake, but still wanted to see it through.

Why? Why did he have to hurt him like this?

Were all these years together just a backup plan for Jihoon?

Was Mingyu just a joke to him?

If not, then what was it? What could Choi Seungcheol offer Jihoon that the other would be interested in? Was Mingyu not enough?

He looked at the music sheets in the desk and he just wanted to rip them into pieces. But as he stood up, he heard the front door opening and he felt a pang in his chest.

He grabbed all the papers and walked out of the room only to find a shocked Jihoon standing in the living room. They stood there in silence looking at each other and Mingyu could feel his heart breaking.

Jihoon’s hair was black again after many years. He looked mature and young at the same time. But also heartbreakingly fragile as Jihoon’s lips and hands started trembling after noticing the music sheets Mingyu had in his hand. The tallest wanted to hug him, but at the same time he wanted to push him away. Because he had been honest with Jihoon when he told him he was the prettiest person for him no matter how many models he had met, and yet, now he was destroying him with that pretty face of his.

Since when the other had stopped loving him?

Why couldn’t Jihoon be honest with him?

Didn’t he deserve an explanation instead of being surrounded by rumors?

Mingyu didn’t know what expression he had on his face as he approached the other, but with each step his hurt and anger started rising up in his chest to the point he felt like he could explode. He wanted to say so many things, to express everything he was feeling at the moment. But all his heart could come up with was that he was no longer important enough to be the other’s music inspiration.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song lyrics in the chapter are the English translation of the following songs in Spanish:
> 
> MORAT – EN UN SOLO DIA  
Termina la fiesta, cada cual a su casa  
Yo me voy con tu cara, pegada en el alma  
Y sin bien conocerte, ya te comienzo a extrañar  
Tal parece que yo me acostumbre a ti en un solo día  
Que te ando extrañando como si hace años que te conocía  
Tal parece que yo en un solo baile te entregue mi vida  
Tal parece que el sentimiento venció las reglas que había
> 
> SEBASTIAN YATRA-COMO MIRARTE  
No me salen las palabras, para expresarte que te quiero  
No sé cómo explicarte, que me haces sentir  
Como si fuera el verano, y el invierno no existiera  
Como si se para todo  
Y con esa sonrisa, que cambia la vida  
Miraste hacia aquí
> 
> VOZ VEIS- AUNQUE SEA POCO  
Sabes que para darte tengo poco  
Quisiera fuese el mundo aunque ni modo  
Pero puedo llenarte los oídos de todas mis canciones  
No son mucho, las hice a punto de ilusiones  
Y si tu corazón no ve mi oferta, te ruego no veas indiferencia,  
Paciencia, es que mi amor es luz de luna,  
Suavecito, pero alumbra los rincones donde tienes el alma oscura  
Si me quieres dímelo, dímelo
> 
> FONSECA -SIMPLES CORAZONES  
Quiero decirte que me pienso equivocar  
Voy a contarte algo que no puedo guardar  
Ya lo intenté, no aguanto más  
Yo sé que hay otro que te cuida el corazón  
A mí también pero he perdido la razón  
Te lo diré  
Yo te confieso que esto nunca me pasó antes  
Y te confieso que no quiero hacer daño a nadie  
Pero desde hace tiempo me perdí en tu mirada
> 
> Quiero bailar contigo hasta que te enamores  
Y aunque sembremos nuestros sueños sobre errores  
Yo te prometo, amor que crecerá el amor  
Porque después de cada invierno vienen flores


	21. Chapter 21

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is all in Jihoon's POV
> 
> (Thank you for the kudos ♥️♥️♥️)

“I guess you didn’t have time to write a song for me!” Jihoon listened to Mingyu’s angry voice as his music sheets flew all around him and his heart sank.

Mingyu had arrived a day prior than expected and against everything that Jihoon had planned, the other had found the songs he had written for Seungcheol. By now there was no doubt Mingyu knew those songs weren’t meant for him.

“Mingyu….” He started, not knowing how to explain the situation. He had been hopeful of at least eating together before talking about this. “I-.”

“I wanted to believe in you! Not in what other models told me, but-.”

“I don’t know what you have heard Mingyu, but things aren’t like that.” Jihoon had to cut him. If they were going to talk about this, he wanted for it to be the truth. He was well aware of how extreme the gossip around the models could be.

“Don’t try to lie to me, Jihoon! Because I don’t even care about what other people told me. I have read your lyrics and it’s more than clear that you have given him something more important than sex, you have given him your heart.” Mingyu said pointing to the sheets that now were spread in their living room floor.

And Jihoon felt like his heart stopped after listening to Mingyu’s words. The other’s expression was so raw that Jihoon could see how much it pained him to say those words, and he felt like the most horrible person in the world.

“I’m sorry…” He said softly. He hated that he was the one making Mingyu feel so hurt, so betrayed.

Jihoon had been so selfish covering up as friendship the fluttering feelings that Seungcheol made him feel and not admitting their encounter as dates. But no matter how much he tried to minimize the nature of their encounters, they did have held hands and kissed. And now Mingyu knew about it, his lyrics were never a lie.

They stood there in silence, with the lump in his throat barely letting him breath as he saw Mingyu’s tears falling. 

“I deserved better…after giving you my love all these years at least I deserved honesty. I deserved respect, Jihoon! Couldn’t you at least give me that? If you didn’t love me anymore, you could have told me. How could you do this to me and let me be the laughingstock of Choi Company?”

Jihoon felt his own tears falling. How come he had been so stupid to forget how fragile Mingyu’s heart was and how much the other cared for him?

“I’m sorry…” That’s all Jihoon could say as he wiped away his tears. He had thought they had been discrete enough to avoid rumors, but he just seemed to be hurting Mingyu more and more.

Mingyu sighed and turned around walking towards the sofa.

“Jihoon….I know our relationship wasn’t in its best moment, and me being away wasn’t helping either. But I thought we had some trust. I trusted you.”

“I’m sorry, I was so confused…” Jihoon didn’t know how else to explain what had happened. How just one encounter with Choi Seungcheol had shook his future plans with Mingyu. “I didn’t know what do, I didn’t wanna hurt you like this…I’m really sorry.” It was useless now to try to defend himself when he had already betrayed the other and his feelings.

Mingyu sat on the sofa with a defeated posture. He kept talking without looking back to Jihoon.

“I’m not going to pretend it doesn’t hurt to know I wasn’t good enough for you. I want to hate you; it would be easier that way. But it’s not that simple, because I had plans for my future with you and suddenly I have to say goodbye.”

Jihoon clenched his fists as new tears started falling.

“It hurts me too….to know that no matter how much we tried all these years, it is over now. I know I did wrong, there is no one else to blame but me. And I know it would be easier to just hate me, but please Mingyu….don’t-.”

“I got an offer to work in Europe for the next three years. I was planning to reject it, because I didn’t want to pressure you into moving away when you haven’t been here even for a year. But now it doesn’t matter anymore. You don’t care enough to consider me a part of your life anymore.”

“I do care, I never meant to hurt you like this. Things went out of control…When I met Seungcheol, I-.” Jihoon stooped talking when Mingyu suddenly stood up and grabbed his still packed suitcase.

The taller one started walking towards the door, but before he could pass him, Jihoon grabbed his arm.

“Mingyu!”

“The apartment contract ends the next month. If you wish to stay, my manager can give you the details to talk to the landlord.”

Mingyu wasn’t even looking back at him. He had wiped away his tears and now he had a serious expression as he tried to free his arm.

“Mingyu, please can you-.”

“I’ll send someone to pick up my things.”

Jihoon sighed because he realized Mingyu had decided to stop the conversation for good. There was no turning back, but he couldn’t let the other go away just like that.

“Mingyu, I’m sorry. I really am.” Jihoon said with more tears falling.

“Then let me go.” The taller said pushing his hand away and opening the door.

Without looking back Mingyu left the apartment and Jihoon fell to the floor in the same spot he had remained since the beginning of their conversation.

He knew there was no way their relationship was going to continue after this conversation, but the pain he felt in his heart was bigger than what he could have imagined. They had been together for so long and just by thinking that Mingyu had decided to hate him, he was dying inside.

There were so many ‘what ifs’ and ‘maybes’ in his mind. If he had only been honest with his own feelings. If he had only been honest with Mingyu. Maybe the other wouldn’t have cried so much. Maybe the other wouldn’t hate him.

He wasn’t sure how many hours have passed, but he felt dizzy from crying, so he barely noticed when Soonyoung entered the apartment. 

“Jihoon!” The other shouted with his arms suddenly around him as he pulled him towards his chest.

Jihoon felt so tired and in the comfort of his friend’s arms he finally let sleep take over him.

When he woke up he was on his bed and Soonyoung was entering the room with a cup of coffee.

“I’m glad you are awake, I was getting worried.” The other said giving him the cup.

“Thanks.” Jihoon said softly and looked at one of the pictures Mingyu had taken of their neighborhood in Japan and that they had decided to put in the wall. 

“You know…Mingyu told me to come over…He knew it was better if you weren’t alone.” Soonyoung said patting his shoulder.

Jihoon felt new tears pooling in his eyes. He had hurt Mingyu so much, but the other still cared, and that made him feel like a horrible person.

“Jihoon…you really hurt him…but, I know this is hurting you too…” His friend pulled him into a hug.

They stayed like that in silence until Jihoon felt calmer.

“What should I do Soonyoung?” He said with his voice muffled by the others jacket.

“What do you mean?” The other asked confused breaking the hug.

“I came to Korea because of Mingyu, but now he is leaving to Europe…”

“Jihoon…don’t you think you have other reasons to stay?” Soonyoung said with an exasperated voice. “Haven’t you been dating or hanging out as you call it with someone you have feelings for?”

Jihoon sighed.

“You were right. I was crazy, I am crazy. I have been trying to normalize a horrible situation. I wouldn’t be feeling like this if I haven’t hurt Mingyu, and he is cheating on his fiancé too! The rumors are already out, what do you think an heir of a hotel chain would do to me if he finds out?”

He heard Soonyoung sigh as the other lay in the bed beside him.

“Then you should talk to him. You are going to regret things if you just leave.”

“I think….I’ll go to my parents’ home and think about this. I can’t work like this…Come with me to Busan?” Jihoon asked with a hopeful expression putting his cup of coffee on the nightstand.

“I wish, but I can’t. My team is preparing for a dance competition this weekend in Hong Kong. But call me if you need me, okay?”

Jihoon nodded feeling the warmth of his friend’s arms around him once again.

“Thanks….If Seungcheol or Chan ask, please don’t tell them where I am. I will contact them when I’m ready, I should have stayed away since the beginning.” Jihoon said pushing the other away and turning around in the bed.

“Jihoon-“

“It’s killing me, you know? How much I have hurt Mingyu and how much my heart is pounding for a person that is going to marry another one.” Jihoon said sighing.

Soonyoung sighed too. “You wrote him songs…are you just going to let him go?”

“What do you want me to do? He hasn’t cancelled his engagement and I’m not going to interrupt his wedding if he decides to go through with it.” Jihoon said turning around to look at his friend.

“You are right….if he was truly interested in you he would have broken up his engagement by now.” Soonyoung said with a serious tone.

Jihoon hummed in response and closed his eyes. He had a lot to think about. Just in one afternoon things had changed drastically and now he was faced with the consequences of an encounter that started like a dream by the beach.


	22. Chapter 22

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter returns to Seungcheol and then Jihoon's POV

Jeonghan was right.

That was all Seungcheol could think as he drowned in the paperwork that lay on his desk.

It had just been a week since the last time he saw Jeonghan, but as the other had predicted, things had turned awfully wrong and Seungcheol had been blamed for all of it.

And even when he didn’t know where the other was at the moment, at least they got to say goodbye properly to their relationship.

“I didn’t think we would end up like this.” Jeonghan had said after sitting in silence next to him in the sofa.

After crying for a long time Jeonghan had finally fallen sleep, but Seungcheol had barely gotten any sleep because he had a lot to think. So he was really surprised when the next morning Jeonghan opened the bedroom’s door and talked to him with a calm voice.

“It’s my fault Jeonghan, you can just put all the blame on me.” Seungcheol had said feeling guilty for betraying the other. He didn’t want to blame Jeonghan for keeping Jisoo memory as a ghost in the background all these years, because he knew that even if the other appeared, Jeonghan wouldn’t leave him.

“I will; I’m tired of defending you.” Jeonghan said without looking up from his folded hands.

“I know.”

Jeonghan’s words had been in his mind all night, about how his father had wanted them to break up a long time ago and how Jeonghan had always defended him and stuck to their relationship.

“But you know… It saddens me…that even after all these years, even when we both tried…” Jeonghan looked up and Seungcheol could see the tears in his eyes.

“I know.” He said softly because this was hurting him too.

“You were always my mother’s favorite. And my father thought Choi Company had a lot of potential to grow and it did. That’s why I thought it would be easier than this.” Jeonghan said looking down again.

Seungcheol frowned. Was that the reason Jeonghan had accepted to date him? Because his parents used to approve of him?

“Don’t think like that. I do have feelings for you. I can’t define them now, but don’t think I used you. I just thought it would be easier this time. Because being accepted was something that seemed so difficult with Jisoo; but with you it was so easy and that made me even happier than I already was. You helped me get out of the pit where my heart sank when I broke up with him. And I’m so thankful for that. For reminding me that I was loved, that I was important to somebody just for being Jeonghan, not for being the heir of Yoon Hotels. But I guess that wasn’t enough…I wasn’t able to make someone happy just by being me.”

Seungcheol listened to the other one talking; Jeonghan’s voice had become merely a whisper, but still managed to break Seungcheol’s heart.

So he hugged the other, hugged him with all the care he could, but as if he didn’t want to let go.

He wanted to make sure Jeonghan knew that he would always be an important person for him and that he wished things would have been easier just like the other wanted.

But the reality wasn’t like that.

Because after announcing their breakup, Jeonghan had disappeared and the Yoons had come to Choi Company for Seungcheol’s head. The only information he could get from Wonwoo’s investigation was that Jeonghan had traveled to Los Angeles, but he hadn’t registered in any hotel. His phone was turned off and he hadn’t contacted any of their other friends.

He had been scolded severely by his father, because after listening to Mr. Yoon’s shouts, the owner of Yoon Hotels had declared that they would stop doing business with Choi Company and that the upcoming hotel event would be their last project together. This had become a crisis in his department as they were almost completely focused on the projects with Yoon Hotels.

And with Jeonghan missing, Seungcheol was turning crazy trying to work together with his replacement. Seokmin was appointed to other activities and couldn’t even help him.

And then there was Chan.

Chan had become Jeonghan’s little brother along the way and even when Chan said he hated when the other babied him, he always took the other’s side. And this time it wasn’t any different. Chan had shouted him about how he dared to break his hyung’s heart and that he should find the other as soon as possible.

He was so thankful that Wonwoo was really good at doing his job, because he couldn’t even think properly at this point.

But even with all the chaos he felt the need to see Jihoon, a difficult task with all the workload he had and with how the other had decided to ignore his messages. So he decided to take care of one task at the time, as soon as the hotel event finished he would go and talk to Jihoon.

********************************************************************************************************************************************

Jihoon was glad his job allowed him some flexibility, because the next day after his breakup with Mingyu he decided to stay home.

He had been almost half a year in Korea, but had already gotten used to the apartment. He was used to Mingyu’s styling decoration since they started living together in Japan, but the fact that the other had adapted a room for his music studio made him feel like the other had been expecting him long before he decided to move with him.

He stayed all day like a zombie and only got to eat when Soonyoung appeared with some take-out. The other tried to distract him with some anecdotes and showed him the video of the routine his crew would use in the competition.

The next day he felt a bit better so he decided to go to the studio and worked with Bumzu in some new melodies. He knew he looked sick and tired, so nobody mentioned anything when he asked for two weeks leave. His fellow producer had agreed to help him in the recording of the already selected songs for Seungkwan’s new album, so he felt less pressured about that. But the pressure on his chest every time he ignored Seungcheol’s messages wasn’t going anywhere. It took him another day at work to settle some things and the following day he just went for a couple of hours to finish some coordination before he returned home.

But he didn’t expect to see Mingyu in the living room as soon as he opened the door.

“I just needed to pick up some things my manager couldn’t find.” The taller said with a stoic expression and Jihoon sighed.

He had noticed how Mingyu’s things had become scarcer in the last few days, the other’s manager leaving a note explaining his unannounced visit.

Mingyu refused to look at him and started pulling his small suitcase closer to the door.

“Mingyu…there is something I just want to say before you go.” Jihoon said barely touching the other’s arm. “You were right; I didn’t respect you or everything we had all these years. I just wanted to apologize for that.”

Jihoon heard the other sigh before he turned to look back at him.

“What are you trying to say Jihoon? That if I ask you to come with me to Europe you will come?”

Jihoon took a step back and took a deep breath.

“I’m sorry Mingyu, but I can’t go with you. I-.”

“Do you know Choi Seungcheol is engaged, right?” The taller said cutting him.

Jihoon shivered because that fact was something he couldn’t deny.

“Yeah…I knew about it…but I guess I turned blind with emotions and now the reality it’s hitting me like a brick. I’m still thinking of what to do.” Jihoon said looking down.

“So you just let him play with you?” Mingyu followed with a bitter tone.

Jihoon looked up surprised.

“Mingyu, it’s not like that….at least I hope so. I could sense he had some feelings for me too...I know I shouldn’t be saying these things to you…I’m sorry” Jihoon bit his lip because he could see the disappointment in Mingyu’s face.

“I never thought this could happen to us, to me…After meeting you I never thought I would look at another person as more than a friend.” Jihoon said looking at the other directly to his eyes.

That instant attraction he felt for Seungcheol had surprised and confused him that’s why he felt conflicted the more he tried to deny it.

“I guess you got bored of me.” Mingyu said glaring at him.

Jihoon felt a pang in his chest. He didn’t want to label boredom as the reason of their imminent breakup.

“Mingyu I…I’m not going to say I’m not at fault, but I think as years passed by we just focused on our own things instead of focusing on us as a couple.”

Mingyu turned around and to Jihoon’s surprise he sat on the sofa.

“I guess I should have acknowledged the signs. I missed you and thought about sharing everything with you. But you stopped telling me about your life, about your songs.”

Jihoon sat beside Mingyu and grabbed his hands; it would probably be the last time.

“I enjoyed the week with you before your trip to Europe. My hopes that we could focus on us was renewed, but I realized that even when I enjoyed the time shared with you, I couldn’t feel we were complete as a couple.”

“So you really stopped caring about me?” Mingyu said looking down to their connected hands.

“Mingyu, we have been together for so long and have been there for each other through it all. I really didn’t want to hurt you and maybe this will seem like a cheap excuse, but maybe that was why I didn’t tell you that I was having all these confusing feelings.”

Mingyu’s hand started shaking and Jihoon noticed how he was trying not to cry.

“Jihoon, I don’t think I’ll find someone like you.”

“I’m not the same Jihoon you fell in love with and you are not the same Mingyu I used to know. You should find someone more suitable than me. Someone that enjoys going to your parties and fashion shows. Someone that likes being in your pictures and go shopping. Someone that would be up to par to your current life.” Jihoon said softly wiping away the tears that started falling from Mingyu’s face.

“Is that what you found in him? Would he be able to stand you when you are ignoring the world and focusing in your songs? Can he stay all night and eat with you at god damn hours? Do you think he would leave everything for you?” Mingyu said with his fists tightly shut.

It was Jihoon’s time to start crying and he looked down. Mingyu’s words reminded him of his own insecurities when it came to a relationship. How he was still socially awkward and had really bad eating and sleeping habits that not many people could cope with.

“I…I always wondered why you fell in love with me when you could have anyone you wanted. But even with all my bad things you showed me how much you loved me and in the process I learned to love myself even more. So, even if he doesn’t leave everything to be with me…I’ll….I’ll be okay. I just don’t want to keep tying you when you deserve better.”

“He won’t love you more than I do.” Mingyu said grabbing him by the shoulders.

“Maybe….but I hope you find someone that loves you more than I did.” Jihoon said pulling the other’s arms down.

Mingyu sighed before standing up.

“I just don’t understand why you are doing this to me…” The taller said covering his face with his hands.

“Mingyu…I wish things were different, but I don’t know what else I can give you at this point besides my best wishes. It’s just that the fire that seemed to consume me every time I was with you it’s no longer burning. But I want to thank you. You helped me become the person I’m today and if it wasn’t for your constant support I wouldn’t have been able to recover from every downfall in university and when I started working.”

Mingyu slowly put his hands down and looked back at Jihoon with new tears in his eyes.

“Why are you trying to make me feel like the bad guy here?”

“I’m not! I’m the one that messed up, but even if you want to hate me now, letting you go it’s the best thing I can do for you now.” Jihoon said standing up. “Because Mingyu, I’m so proud of you and I’m sorry if I didn’t say it enough. But I wish you the best in your career in Europe.” He finished.

Mingyu stood in silence looking back at him assimilating his words.

“So this is it? Our last goodbye…” Mingyu finally said with a soft voice.

Jihoon nodded, sure that if he talked he would start crying again.

Mingyu nodded too before moving closer to the door along with his suitcase.

“Take care, Mingyu.”

“Bye Jihoon.” The taller said closing the front door and giving an end to a story that started the first time they saw each other in Japan nine years ago.


	23. Chapter 23

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is all in Seungcheol's POV

Seungcheol looked around the place and let himself smile. Despite all the complications his team had managed to finish all the arrangements and the event at the hotel had been a success. He was waiting for Mr. Shim, Jeonghan’s replacement, to say goodbye and finally go home. But before he got closer to the man he was faced with Mrs. Yoon.

“Seungcheol-ssi…” The woman sighed. “Did you receive any news from Jeonghan?” She said, her expression showing her anxiousness.

Jeonghan had been gone for more than a week by now and his phone was still turned off. Seungcheol would be lying if he said he wasn’t worried, but there wasn’t any new information he could find. Seungcheol knew the Yoons had sent a few people to L.A to find Jeonghan, but they haven’t been able to find him either.

“I’m sorry Mrs. Yoon, but there is no new information about him.” He said feeling guilty; it was partially his fault Jeonghan was acting so rashly.

“Okay then, goodnight.” She said with her face turning stoic as she walked towards her husband.

Seungcheol looked at the Yoon couple and sighed. He could still remember the first time he met them when Jeonghan invited him to his house. Mrs. Yoon seemed so excited to meet him, telling him Jeonghan had been talking a lot about him. They had dinner together and the environment had been joyful, but when Mr. Yoon arrived both Mrs. Yoon and Jeonghan seemed a bit more tense and quiet, so Seungcheol just followed their actions and that had at least earn him the older man’s approval to come to his house again. Long gone were those times and it had been more than a year since the last time he entered the Yoon’s house.

“Mr. Choi, here is the document you asked for.” 

Seungcheol turned around surprised and Mr. Shim was giving him a small smile with the signed report that confirmed the end of the event. They shook hands and with that Seungcheol’s last event with the Yoons had finished. It felt bittersweet, because even when he knew this could happen if Jeonghan and he broke up, he was used to this job and the known faces of the different Yoon Hotels personnel. He was glad his team did a great job until the end.

“Mr. Choi?” Wonwoo’s voice interrupted his thoughts.

“Good job today, Wonwoo. Tomorrow we will have a meeting to check if we have any other project for this month.” Seungcheol said trying to sound cheerful even when he knew Wonwoo had been the receiver of all the team’s worried inquiries regarding their future. The visit of the Yoons to Choi Company hadn’t been discrete at all and his workmates were aware of the termination of their business relationship with Yoon Hotels.

His assistant nodded, before checking his phone.

“Mr. Kim confirmed that for the next month magazine issue we managed to get photographer Xu Minghao, but we couldn’t get all the models of Minki-ssi last collection. Wen Junhui is in China and Kim Mingyu is in Europe.” 

“Thanks Wonwoo, mmm…did Kim Mingyu’s manager indicated when he will be returning to Korea?” Seungcheol couldn’t help but ask. He really needed to talk to Jihoon before Mingyu returned because he knew Jihoon would be avoiding him just like in the beginning only to protect his relationship.

“From the information I could get, Kim Mingyu has returned to Europe two days ago because he got a three year contract and he is moving indefinitely there.”

That information shocked Seungcheol. That meant that Kim Mingyu had been in Korea and maybe that was the reason Jihoon had been ignoring his messages. And now if the other was moving to Europe, Jihoon could have decided to follow him there, just like when he moved from Japan to Korea.

He could feel an ache in his chest as the thoughts of not being able to see Jihoon again invaded his mind. The idea that the other had decided to move without any notice and how he should have done something sooner before losing Jihoon was making his head hurt. But at the same time he still felt a bit of hope knowing that it took one year before Jihoon moved to Korea, so maybe it wasn’t too late to talk with the other.

So he just thanked Wonwoo and practically ran to his car. He tried to call Jihoon again without success and when he started driving to Jihoon’s apartment he realized he didn’t know his apartment number. The only time he had taken the other home he left him outside the building, so it was not an option. He turned around and drove to Jihoon’s workplace, it was his next best option since Jihoon usually worked late and maybe they could eat together.

But when he arrived there he met Bumzu at the entrance and the bad news just kept piling up.

“Mr. Choi, Woozi-ssi has taken a leave. But I have already talked with Seungkwan-ssi’s manager and if you need any information about the songs for the magazine issue, I will be ready to help you.”

Seungcheol had tried to give the other a polite smile as he said goodbye, but he could feel how his eyes were watering and the desperation was showing in his face. Bumzu didn’t know Jihoon’s whereabouts and couldn’t give him more information of how to contact the other.

He sat in his car not knowing what to, feeling lost and guilty. But then he remembered the only person Jihoon had officially introduced him outside of his workplace. So he called Chan.

“Chan, please I really need Kwon Soonyoung’s phone number.” He said in a hurried voice.

“Did you find Jeonghan-hyung?” The younger asked, still upset with his older brother.

“Chan, you know I have been trying to find him with no success. I’ll let you know if I can contact him.” He said feeling upset that his younger brother seemed to be still mad at him.

“Then….I’ll talk to you then.” The younger said almost hanging up.

“Chan! I really need Kwon Soonyoung’s phone number.” Seungcheol was trying not to shout at the other.

“Why do you need his phone number?”

“Chan please, it is important.” He knew he was practically begging, but it was his only chance of finding Jihoon.

He heard the other sigh before answering.

“Okay, okay, I’ll send it to you through kakao, but he probably won’t answer you. He is traveling back tonight from the dance contest in Hong Kong.”

He thanked Chan and started driving home, but his mind kept racing with thoughts of how his conversation with the other would go. He knew Kwon Soonyoung was not really fond of him and he would probably keep Jihoon whereabouts a secret. He didn’t want to wait any longer, but he concluded that it was a better option to visit Kwon Soonyoung’s dance studio the next day.

He was so focused on his thoughts that he got startled when his phone started ringing and he almost crashed when Hoseok said with an excited voice something that he had been expecting to listen for the last few months.

“Seungcheol! Kim Mingyu and Lee Jihoon broke up!”

He stopped the car before he got in a real accident and took a deep breath.

“How do you know?” Seungcheol asked with a nervous smile appearing in his face.

“I just met Changkyun at the bar and he was already drunk and complaining about how Kim Mingyu got scouted by a European Company and not him and with just a few questions he told me the other was lucky that he could run to Europe after breaking up with his boyfriend.”

Seungcheol’s smile turned wide and he wished his friend was with him so he could hug him with all his strength.

“Hoseok! Thank you, thank you!” He felt energized all of the sudden.

“Well, you needed good news after all the chaos with Jeonghan. By the way, do you have any news about him? Minhyuk is acting all crazy calling him and sending him kakao messages every day.”

“No, no news at all. I’m worried, but maybe like Changkyun said, Jeonghan needed to run away after our break up.”

Hoseok agreed and after some more talk he cut the call.

Seungcheol knew his body was tired, but even when he arrived to his apartment he couldn’t sleep. His mind was a mix of emotions. He was worried about Jeonghan and the future of his department, but with the news about Jihoon he felt excited and hopeful. But then he looked around his living room and could see the reminders of his relationship with Jeonghan, and even when he didn’t want to think about it, he knew Jihoon would be really affected about his breakup with Kim Mingyu.

The next day, he felt even more tired, but still went to the team meeting and after that he finally went to the dance studio.

“Hyung? I sent you Soonyoung-hyung’s number, what are you doing here?” Chan asked confused, but Seungcheol just gave him a small smile and a pat on his head before he raced towards Kwon Soonyoung.

“Seungcheol-ssi, what are you doing here?” The other asked with an expressionless face.

“I really need to know where Jihoon is.” He saw the other frown, but he couldn't retract now. “I know he just broke up with Kim Mingyu, but-.”

The other’s expression turned even more bitter surprising Seungcheol.

“They have broken up, but that doesn’t mean you can play with Jihoon while you are still engaged and ready to marry.” The other said turning around to leave.

“I broke up my engagement with Jeonghan.” Seungcheol said making the other stop his steps.

Soonyoung turned around with a surprised expression that turned into a worried one.

“I don’t know how your relationship with Yoon Jeonghan was, but Mingyu is still really important to Jihoon and he is really affected by this breakup.”

Those were the words Seungcheol didn’t want to hear, but knew were true.

“I just don’t want to lose him. I want to tell him that I’m single now and if he decides he wants to be with me, I’ll be waiting for him.” Seungcheol knew his face showed how all of this was affecting him emotionally.

He could see how conflicted the other was too as he remained silent for a long time.

“I shouldn’t be telling you this, but…” The other sighed. “Jihoon is in Busan. That’s all I’m going to say, good luck finding him there.”

Seungcheol felt like he could smile again and this time he couldn’t help but give the other a hug as he thanked him.

He should have thought about it before, about the possibility of the other being there. But now he was sure Jihoon was in Busan, not a small a city, but if he could remember well, Jihoon’s parents’ house was in a close neighborhood to his grandmother’s. He was already picturing all the places he could look for the other.

Soonyoung gave him a small smile, before he turned serious.

“Jihoon would probably kill me for this, but he sent me a song yesterday and I guess it’s for you.”

Seungcheol felt his heart racing with excitement at the idea of Jihoon writing a song for him.

“Don’t get too excited, you should probably listen to it before meeting Jihoon.”

Seungcheol looked at Soonyoung now with a worried expression, but still gave the other his phone so he could send him the song.

He thanked him again and started walking towards his car with his phone tightly grabbed in his hand. He knew Kwon Soonyoung had told him not to get excited about the song, but he couldn’t help it.

So as soon as he sat behind the wheel, he opened the file and let Jihoon’s angelic voice fill the silence.

_“When you stole my glance without permission, I understood that you can’t cover the sun with a finger._

_I underestimated your kisses, so your spell caught me._

_For playing so much with fire, I burned my heart._

_And although I have written so many plans for you to love me, I know it's true that love is a two-player game. _

_Because the idea of just being your friend without breaking the rules, I want to be honest, it never worked._

_If it's for me, I would force you to stay, but the wind is blowing in your favor today. _

_And if it costs a life to catch you, don't make it worse for me._

_Let me go_

_Prohibit your eyes from stealing my breath._

_Force your mouth to be away from mine._

_My heart won't bear it if you don't let me go._

_Let me go_

_Forget everything you know, don't expect me to miss you._

_And erase each lyric even if it's your song._

_St-.”_

The song was cut abruptly and Seungcheol finally noticed his elaborate breath, but he also realized that more than ever he needed to find Jihoon as soon as possible.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The lyrics in the chapter are the English translation of the song "Dejame ir" by Andres Cepeda and Morat. The lyrics in Spanish are the following:
> 
> Cuando me robaste la mirada y no tenías permiso  
Comprendí que con un dedo no se tapa el sol  
Yo subestimé tus besos, me atrapó tu hechizo  
Por jugar tanto con fuego, quemé el corazón
> 
> Y aunque tengo escritos tantos planes para que me quieras  
Sé que es cierto que el amor es un juego de dos  
Porque eso de ser tu amigo sin romper las reglas  
Hoy quisiera ser honesto jamás funcionó
> 
> Si es por mí, te obligaría a quedarte  
Pero el viento hoy sopla a tu favor  
Y si cuesta una vida atraparte   
No lo hagas peor
> 
> Déjame ir  
Prohíbele a tus ojos robarme el aliento  
Obliga a tu boca que procure estar lejos  
Mi corazón no va aguantar si no me sueltas  
Déjame ir
> 
> Olvídate de todo lo que sabes  
No vayas a esperar que yo te extrañe  
Y borra cada letra aunque sea tu canción


	24. Chapter 24

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is all in Jeonghan's POV. I just want to warn you that in this chapter, he doesn't have a healthy coping mechanism, a behavior I don't encourage to repeat.

Jeonghan didn’t have a real plan when he boarded the airplane to L.A. The flight had been long, but he spent almost all the time sleeping, because he felt exhausted. And when he finally arrived, he took the decision to rent an apartment near the beach instead of checking in a hotel, he didn’t want his parents to track him that easily.

The first three days passed in a blur full of parties and drinking, but that only left him feeling more empty and lonely. So in the fourth day he decided to sleep most of the day and eat a proper meal. He also bought some groceries feeling somehow accomplished, since he never did that on his own. At the end he included many bottles of beer and soju, after all he still felt like drinking before going to sleep at night.

On his fifth day in L.A he finally decided to go to the beach, the weather was nice and it had been a while since he actually spent a relaxing time like that. He also got excited with the idea of going to the beach festival the next day.

During all those days he tried to forget the things that happened back in Seoul, but at random moments his mind would take him back there. Like when he went to pick up his wallet and saw his cellphone next to it on top of the nightstand. He remembered his mother’s shocked face, his father saying “I told you so...”, the shouts, the tears and everything that happened when he announced his breakup with Seungcheol. And he could only close his eyes and take a deep breath to calm himself. And even when he knew his mother was probably worried and Seungcheol too, he couldn’t dare to turn his phone on.

The next morning he went to the beach to take a walk enjoying the feeling of the sand under his feet, the sea breeze and the shinning sun. The beach festival was about to start and the area was rapidly becoming crowded, but instead of returning to his apartment, Jeonghan embraced this unusual experience and ate from the food stands and tried to fly a kite. He felt great every time he was treated like any tourist instead of all the overdone protocol when he would visit one of the Yoon Hotels and related restaurants.

He was enjoying his day, finally feeling liberated from all the overwhelming thoughts that clouded his mind, but everything stopped when he heard his voice. He was thanking a radio station for the festival and he invited the next singer to the stage, but for Jeonghan the words were the least important thing at the moment and he could only focus on his compelling voice. Jeonghan started walking towards the stage needing to see him closer even when the screens were showing his face.

His heart was beating faster than ever before, because he knew that even when a part of him wasn’t expecting anything when he bought his airplane ticket to L.A, another part of him had been expecting to find the other waiting for him.

So he didn’t care when people started chanting for the singer or the increasing number of people surrounding him, his eyes could only focus on the other. Jeonghan saw him talking a bit with other people on the side of the stage before leaving the restricted area and walking towards the open space were the crowd was.

Jeonghan knew if he stayed rooted to his place he would lose his opportunity to talk to the other, so he started running towards him colliding with several people, but he didn’t care and even when he felt his heart about to explode he kept running. But when he was about to reach him, the other turned around waving to a bunch of people and Jeonghan just reacted out of desperation.

“Jisoo!” He shouted and stood there panting.

He wasn’t sure if the other had heard him with all the noise, but then he saw him turn around slowly.

Jisoo looked back at him for a moment, before turning to talk to his group of friends and Jeonghan trembled in fear of a rejection. But then he turned back to him and started walking in his direction.

“Hi Jeonghan.” He said with his soft voice and a smile, but Jeonghan’s words got stuck in his throat and he could only look back at him in silence.

The singer on stage was livening up the crowd and the noise was all around them, so Jisoo took a step closer.

“Do you want to go for a drink nearby?”

Jeonghan nodded not trusting his voice and followed the other as they walked away from the festival in silence. His eyes traveled from the other’s face to the ground not believing he was just next to him. They entered a small bar not far away from Jeonghan’s apartment and sat down. Jisoo ordered two beers after receiving Jeonghan’s small nod of approval and they remained in silence once again.

With Jisoo sitting so close, Jeonghan couldn’t stop looking at his face as he felt all sort of emotions. And as memories started to flood his mind, Jisoo gave him a small smile.

“So…Jeonghan, how have you been?”

Jeonghan remained silent looking back at him.

“The last thing I heard was that you started dating Seungcheol.”

Jeonghan looked down feeling a pang in his chest. He had traveled all the way from Seoul wanting to forget that and it was ironic that Jisoo was the one asking about it.

“I guess it didn’t work out…” Jisoo said with a guilty tone.

Jeonghan still didn’t say a word or look up, but he could listen as Jisoo took his beer bottle and started drinking. He also heard him sigh before he spoke again.

“Jeonghan…I know I’m years too late, but I just wanted to apologize.”

And those words managed to make Jeonghan look up with a shocked expression.

“The last time we saw each other I was cruel to you; and for a long time I blamed myself for treating you so badly when you were just worried about our future.” Jisoo sighed again. “I was just a dumb kid who refused to acknowledge the reality and pushed you away in the worst way. I blindly believed in my dream of becoming a famous musician, but life showed me how unprepared I was for all of it. And after just a year my band disbanded and I had no place to sleep or money to eat. I knew I had hit rock bottom and realized that I never thought of a backup plan in case things didn’t work out. I had no degree or job experience and it took me a while to finally live at peace with myself.”

Jeonghan felt his eyes watering looking at the other and how he never found out how much he had suffered after their breakup. He wanted to hug him and never let go.

“Luckily I found a wonderful girl that changed my life for the better. And my son-”

“What?” Jeonghan gasped moving his eyes to look at Jisoo’s hand where he found a wedding ring in his finger. He bit his lower lip and turn to look at the other side, but he knew there were tears already falling from his eyes and there was an increasing ache in his chest.

“Jeonghan…” Jisoo called him softly.

He had thought about it; about the possibility that Jisoo could find another person and start anew, but he had always suppressed the idea altogether, and yet here he was, facing the reality of a married Jisoo and a kid.

“Jeonghan?” Jisoo’s voice was so soft and calm like always. The kind of voice that calmed Jeonghan’s senses, but this time it was breaking his heart.

“I need to go.” He said standing up without turning to look back at the other.

“Jeonghan wait!” The other grabbed his arm and before he could react he felt the tip of a pen marking his skin.

“This is my number. If you want to talk again…” Jisoo said with a nervous voice before letting go of his arm.

Jeonghan left the bar with more tears wetting his cheeks and practically ran to his rented apartment. He felt destroyed just like the first time they broke up, but on the contrary this time he was the only one suffering.

He spent the next three days drinking his pain away in his apartment with the curtains closed. He had passed out on the bed, on the floor, in the bathroom, but he didn’t care. He had been a fool for believing Jisoo would wait for them to meet again or believing that things would be simpler this time.

When he woke up he wasn’t sure what time was it, but as he looked around he noticed his dirty clothes and the empty bottles all over the floor and felt alone and miserable. He tried to stand up only to fall back to the floor bringing down a pillow and his cellphone with him.

He looked at the mobile device for a long time remembering Jisoo’s words about calling him, but he noticed the numbers on his arm had almost disappeared after being stained with soju and water when he tried to clean his throw up.

New tears started appearing in his eyes, but at the end he grabbed his phone and turned it on. He had several missed calls and messages from his parents, Chan, his friends and Seungcheol.

** _Are you ok?_ **

That was all Seungcheol’s last message said and without thinking too much or maybe realizing he was the only one he could trust at this moment, Jeonghan texted back.

**I don’t know**

He was being honest with that, he was mess at the moment and yet, he knew deep inside that there was no other option than accepting the reality of what was happening.

** _You will be okay_ **

Seungcheol answered after a moment and Jeonghan was glad he was being his supportive-self instead of asking where he was.

Jeonghan’s hand trembled as he texted his next words.

**I met Jisoo**

** _I’m glad you did_ **

Jeonghan grabbed his throbbing head and looked down. Upon seeing Jisoo on that stage he had also felt like that, but not after knowing the other had completely moved on with his life.

**He has a wife and a kid**

He saw on the screen how the other was typing, then it stopped and then he was typing again. But suddenly there was an incoming call and he accepted without saying a word.

“Jeonghan.”

He didn’t answer.

“Jeonghan.”

“Seungcheol...” He answered with a broken voice.

He heard the other gasp.

“You have been drinking.” Seungcheol said with a soft voice. “Jeonghan don’t drink anymore.” He said almost pleading.

“I don’t have any more alcohol to drink.” Jeonghan answered with a soft chuckle.

He heard Seungcheol sigh at his words just like he did when he saw him completely drunk and refusing to explain what happened with Jisoo when he returned to Korea years ago.

“Jeonghan…about Jisoo…” The other started after being quiet for a short time.

“I really loved him Seungcheol…” Jeonghan heard himself saying as tears started falling again.

“I know…I know you did…” The other said with a soothing voice.

“I didn’t get to say goodbye…again” Jeonghan said trying to wipe away his tears.

“Jeonghan…what happened back then?”

He stayed in silence for a moment hugging his knees close to his chest and putting his head on top. Seungcheol waited for him in silence too.

“I…We…we fought because he wanted to stay here and be a musician. He dropped university and refused to return with me to work at Yoon Hotels. But more than that he said he felt like he wasn’t enough for my family and for me; that I couldn’t understand it, because I was just a rich kid. That…I was ashamed of him…that I never fought for us…” Jeonghan hated that he was crying again even when his heart had felt warm after Jisoo’s apology.

Seungcheol took his time answering with a sad voice. “You did everything you could for him, I was a witness of that, but I guess that wasn’t what he wanted.”

“Yeah…I realized that….” Jeonghan sobbed softly before talking again. “Seungcheol…I tried to make things better when I was with you, but I screwed it up again. I’m sorry, I’m sorry I did the same to you… I destroyed what we had.”

“Jeonghan…” Seungcheol said with a soft voice. “I don’t blame you for what happened to us. We took our own decisions and I knew you tried to do your best for me and for that I’m thankful.”

Jeonghan sobbed again before speaking. “I’m glad we dated, Seungcheol, I don’t regret it at all.”

Seungcheol and he had been friends for years before they started dating and when things had been horrible with his parents or Jisoo he had always been there for him. And after they started dating Seungcheol had been the only one to turn his frown into smiles and cover his sadness with hugs and kisses.

“I miss you…” Jeonghan said with a small smile.

“I miss you too…”

Jeonghan chuckled softly knowing Seungcheol had started crying too. They both knew that after breaking up things would never be the same, there were so many issues and people involved, but at least like this, in the vulnerability of this phone call they could say things like this.

They stayed in silence once again, but after a moment he heard the other sniff and cough before talking.

“Jeonghan, take your time in there…I’m sure you will make things right this time.”

“How are you so sure about that?” Jeonghan asked not trusting himself.

“Because you are Yoon Jeonghan…the same guy that tricked me into swimming in a lake in the middle of December and laughed at me when I almost died frozen.”

Jeonghan heard himself laugh. It had been a while since the last time he did it.

“You are too gullible Seungcheol.”

“And you are too smart. You’ll become the best general manager of Yoon Hotels if that is what you want to do. And you will amend things with Jisoo if that’s what you think you need to do. Yoon Jeonghan, you are more than Yoon Hotel’s heir. You just have to acknowledge that.”

The other was saying all the things he need to hear.

“You are smiling now…” Seungcheol said softly and Jeonghan touched his face realizing it was true. “Jeonghan…your father can say whatever he wants about you, but I know you that apart from being smart and well deserving of your job, you are kind and really care for the ones you love. I have seen you hug your mom with so much love and the fact that you were always there for Chan speaks volumes of you.”

Jeonghan felt like he should really stop crying, but a few tears started falling.

“Thanks Seungcheol.” He said softly.

“I need to go to sleep now. Take care okay?”

“Okay” Jeonghan answered.

“I’ll tell Chan you are doing okay. He is worried sick about you.” Seungcheol said with a serious voice.

Jeonghan let himself smile again. Chan was his baby.

“Thanks…I’ll send him some pictures later.”

Seungcheol hummed in agreement and then cut the call with a soft goodbye.

Jeonghan wiped away his tears and stood up slowly. He walked towards the window and opened the curtains; after all, it was a new day.


	25. Chapter 25

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is all in Seungcheol's POV

Seungcheol never thought he would be returning to Busan in less than a year. The traffic had been heavier than he thought so when he arrived to his grandmother’s house he looked even more exhausted than in the morning.

“Cheollie, welcome home.” She said sweetly, just like the last time he visited her months ago.

Her surprised expression had turned into a smile so fast as if she was expecting him to come, and this time Seungcheol returned her smile with a bigger one.

Things had changed so much for him since the last time he was in Busan and even when there was still a bittersweet feeling, this time he knew he had to appreciate more all the nice things his grandmother did for him instead of feeling sad just by being at her house. He had talked about it with Jihoon and the other had been a really good listener and gave him advices that helped him see things in another perspective.

He had eaten dinner with his grandmother, knowing it was too late at night to look for Jihoon. She reminded him of the last time he had visited and how her neighbors had been asking about him. Seungcheol did remember all those senior citizens and how they enjoyed playing games and listening to music in the community center. He was feeling relaxed in his seat after eating her delicious food and listening to her soothing voice, when he was suddenly startled by the mention of a name.

“And tomorrow we will be celebrating Mr. Kim’s birthday, since his sons are in Canada we will have a small reunion at the community center. Jihoon, Mrs. Lee’s son, will surely sing and play the piano for us.”

“Lee Jihoon!?” Seungcheol almost jumped out of his seat in excitement.

His grandmother chuckled a bit. “Is he a friend of yours?”

Seungcheol didn’t know what kind of expression he had on his face, but his grandmother suddenly stopped smiling.

“I thought you were engaged to Yoon Jeonghan.” She said softly.

His grandmother had only met Jeonghan a couple of times in Seoul, but she thought he was a good person and she only asked Seungcheol if he made him happy. That had been years ago, as now she preferred to stay in Busan and the phone calls were scarce between him and her.

“Seungcheol?” She asked touching his hand softly.

“Actually, we broke up…” He said still remembering his father’s shocked face when he told him the same words.

His grandmother gave him a small smile that he returned.

“You were together for a long time…I wonder if he is doing okay.”

Those words left him speechless. He had been worried about Jeonghan whereabouts, as everyone that knew him did, but nobody had tried reaching the other focusing on his feelings after the breakup. So before going to sleep, he decided to send a message to the other without inquiring about where he was.

He wasn’t sure if the question conveyed everything he wanted to ask, but he hoped the other answered this time. His ‘**_Are you ok?’ _**was answered within 20 minutes after sending it, surprising him and giving him a sense of relief. But the following phone call surprised him even more. After Jeonghan disappeared, he assumed the other would hate him and ignore him for a long time, but Jeonghan just seemed lost and after meeting a married Jisoo, he just needed someone to tell him he was strong and that he would be okay.

And the talk about their broken relationship was something that they hadn’t been able to do when the pain was still too much, but being able to really express their feelings and Jeonghan’s soft ‘I miss you’ was something Seungcheol needed to hear, something that reminded him that not everything had been wrong in their relationship. Reminded him that even if things had gotten weary, they didn’t regret their time together.

He had told the other he was going to sleep before cutting the call, but he actually couldn’t do it. Even when now he was more relaxed knowing about Jeonghan’s condition, there was other person that was occupying his mind. Because without words his grandmother had noticed he had special feeling towards Jihoon and she seemed more worried than happy for him. She had asked Seungcheol about how he met Jihoon and he had told her many things, but never mentioned that all those things happened while he was still with Jeonghan, he knew she would look down on that. And she had stayed quiet listening to him before saying something that put him on edge, something along the lines of Mrs. Lee being so happy that her son decided to move back to Korea, but now he was thinking of moving back to Japan. With that new information he knew he had to be at the community center the next day and talk with Jihoon.

And that was what he did; he woke up early and took his grandmother to the community center. In there, he was introduced again as her grandson and they were all ready to happily greet him. He smiled to everyone and helped in what he could, but he kept looking at the main door hoping Jihoon would appear at any moment. He had asked some of the people in there if they knew Jihoon and they told him he had visited a couple of times during the last week and that he was really good at singing and playing piano. Seungcheol’s smile grew after listening to those words, because Jihoon was great indeed.

Lunch time had almost arrived when Mr. Kim appeared at the door and everyone went to greet him, but Seungcheol’s eyes could only focus on the people behind him. At the entrance quietly stood Mrs. Lee and Jihoon.

The other hadn’t noticed him back as he was instructed to play something in the piano while the food was being put on the table. And Seungcheol’s feelings just kept growing and growing in his chest. Seeing Jihoon after a couple of weeks was making his heart beat really fast and listening to his voice, to his music, was like an injection of energy, of love.

He didn’t notice the time passing until his grandmother started pulling him towards the table and he realized his seat was really far away from Jihoon’s. He hadn’t noticed that while he was entranced by the other, the place started fulling with new people and now there was no way of sitting close to the other. But as he kept looking, his eyes suddenly matched Jihoon’s gaze and the other let go of his spoon with a surprised expression. Seungcheol looked at him worried, but the other looked down to pick up his spoon and clean the rice that had fallen on the table, before deciding to ignore him completely.

Seungcheol knew he was pouting by the end of the birthday lunch as Jihoon decided to play the piano again and the neighbors forbid him to interrupt him. And then he was appointed in cleaning duty and he felt like an eternity passed before he had the chance to approach the other. But when he returned to the main hall, Jihoon was no longer there.

He sighed feeling dejected, when he felt a hand patting his shoulder.

“Seungcheol-ssi…” Mrs. Lee said with a small smile. “Jihoonie went to the beach, he usually seats near the bridge. He likes it when it lights up at night.” She finished still with a warm smile as if she knew more than what her words indicated.

He thanked her before going to his car to drive to the beach. The sun was still up in the sky, but in a couple of hours it would probably be setting and Seungcheol hoped things with Jihoon would be okay by then.

And as she said, he found Jihoon sitting in the sand near the bridge. And while some people were still swimming and enjoying the last rays of sun, Jihoon looked lost in his thoughts. Seungcheol hesitated before approaching the other, because as much as he had wanted to talk to him, having the other in front made him lose his words.

“Jihoon?” He asked gently approaching the other.

“I know Soonyoung told you I’m here.” Jihoon mumbled with a bitter tone.

Seungcheol nodded as he sat beside the other, but then they stayed in silence again and Seungcheol realized that Kwon Soonyoung hadn’t told Jihoon about his breakup with Jeonghan.

“I…I broke up with Jeonghan.” He said nervously.

And with those words he finally made the other turn around to look at him.

“What!?” Jihoon looked surprised and confused, but with a closer inspection of his face, he looked exhausted.

“Well, we broke up and our families already know about it…I just wanted you to know that.”

Jihoon looked down at his hands before sighing.

“You already know I broke up with Mingyu…”

Seungcheol couldn’t help the small smile that appeared on his face, but it vanished as soon as he heard Jihoon’s deep sigh.

“I hurt him, I’m angry at myself for that.” Jihoon said bringing his legs in and hugging them.

Seungcheol didn’t know what to say after that. Kwon Soonyoung had made it clear that Kim Mingyu was still important to Jihoon.

Minutes passed with them in silence, with Seungcheol longing to touch the other, because he didn’t know in what other way he could express everything he was feeling at the moment.

“Mingyu said that other models were saying things about us…” Jihoon said now looking at the sea. “Yoon Jeonghan probably hates me for meddling in your engagement…and your family too…”

Seungcheol just looked back at the other. He didn’t want to say all the things that had gotten wrong after the engagement was broken, all the shouts, the rumors, the cancelled projects and negotiations. None of that was Jihoon’s fault, and Seungcheol would be dammed before he made the other feel like that.

“Jihoon…I understand that Kim Mingyu is still important to you and I know things are not easy at the moment with people spreading rumors, but I’m assuring you Jeonghan will never hurt you or seek for revenge. I-.”

“What were we doing Seungcheol?” Jihoon asked turning to him. “Were we just hanging out as friends? Were we something more? Were we sneaking around like forbidden lovers or something?”

Seungcheol didn’t know how to answer those questions. He hadn’t been able to label what he had with Jihoon, he just knew that with every moment shared, his feelings for the other kept increasing to the point he was ready to face it all for him. Just being there next to the other sitting in the sand was healing the hell of a week he had.

“The truth is we ignored all the signs that told us that we were hurting people that loved us, that cared about us. I had a boyfriend and you had a fiancé and yet we insisted on going out and even kissed many times. And I’m not going to deny that it felt good spending time with you, that you made me feel so many things, but there is a reason why this worked so far…it’s because we were creating a different reality. I only met your brother because of that unexpected encounter and you would eventually meet Soonyoung because of work, but apart from that we never mixed our realities. And now everything is crashing on us.”

Seungcheol gulped assimilating everything Jihoon was saying.

“What are you trying to say Jihoon?” He asked scared of the answer. He had started trembling and not only because of the sea breeze that was getting stronger, but because Jihoon had turned away from him.

“That you know you have a different reality than mine. Even when we have been trying to overlook the fact that you are an heir, I know our ways will only become more distant with time.”

That speech sounded oddly familiar. Like Jisoo being scared of not being enough for Jeonghan.

“Is that why you are trying to push me away?” Seungcheol asked.

Was that what Jihoon was thinking when he wrote the song he listened before driving to Busan? Was he scared that Seungcheol would choose his job over him and would prefer to date another heir?

“It’s what I wish for Mingyu to have and what I wish for you to have; someone that would be up to par to your life.”

Seungcheol felt aggravated, why was Jihoon thinking he was not good enough for him? He didn’t want to lose Jihoon just because of the idea that other people had about him, about them. Jihoon was great at his craft and Seungcheol was his number one fan and would introduce him proudly to anyone who would ask.

“I know you have tried to do the best for me like accepting to eat with me at night sometimes and waiting in my studio for long hours while I write my songs, but is that the everyday reality that you want?” Jihoon said hugging his legs tighter and putting his head on top of them looking down.

Seungcheol took a deep breath and moved to kneel in front of Jihoon. He had been ready to answer that question for longer than he realized and now he was prepared to answer it with all certainty in the world.


	26. Chapter 26

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is all in Jihoon's POV

Jihoon’s parents had been surprised when he said he would be staying a couple of weeks with them in Busan, but they still received him with open arms. During his first couple of days he tried to keep his feelings at bay, but his mother knew there was something going on with him. He thought it was probably the mention of returning to Japan. So after breakfast on his third day there, his mother invited him to walk in the beach and sat on Jihoon’s favorite spot.

They stayed in silence for a long time watching the sea and the people that started arriving to the beach. It was supposed to be a relaxing time, but Jihoon felt anxious. His mother wasn’t even looking at him, but when Jihoon’s breath started getting heavier, his mother started humming one of his favorite songs as a kid. It was the first song he had learned in the piano and his mother always asked him to play that song for her birthday, it didn’t matter where he was.

“Jihoonie, you know you can tell me if there is something wrong. Is it your work? Something happened with Soonyoung? With Mingyu?”

At the mention of the latter Jihoon bit his lower lip and looked down. Suddenly his mother’s arms were around him and his head was on her shoulder.

“Tell me what happened with him.” She said softly.

Jihoon was only planning to tell her they had broken up, but as she started petting his head, something she hadn’t done again after he moved to Japan, he told her everything. About meeting Seungcheol in Busan and then in Seoul, about his conflicted feelings, about the songs and about his painful breakup with Mingyu. About how he was so scared of his feelings and that he wanted to see Seungcheol as much as he didn’t want to see him, because with every day that passed, Jihoon found more and more reasons to cut everything with Seungcheol, even when his heart was hurting from just thinking about it.

“You need to talk to him.” Was the last thing she had said giving him a tight hug. She believed that he should be honest with Seungcheol about his feelings and if the other decided to keep his engagement then there was no more things to talk about, but if he was willing to break it up, then Jihoon should expose all of the other things he was thinking. Only by exposing his fears to the other, they would be able to see the reality in which they stood on.

And with that conversation in mind days had passed. Soonyoung had called him to check how he was and Jihoon couldn’t say he was doing that bad. During the day he would help his mother with her music classes and the house chores or maybe go to the community center to entertain the neighbors with music and enjoy walking and swimming in the beach. But during the night, when it was silent all the complicated thoughts would return to him and he had end up writing a song about it. Because every time he thought about Seungcheol it was like a fire lighting in his heart, but the feelings turned to be too much and the situation too complicated and the future so uncertain that it felt like he was burning. He had sent the song to his friend and Soonyoung had promised to be there for him no matter what happened and Jihoon appreciated that.

And if he was not thinking about his situation with Seungcheol, he was thinking about Mingyu. And he wanted to smash the piano every time he started creating a sad melody and the first words that appeared in his mind were ‘I’m sorry’. After their last meeting in the apartment in Seoul, he didn’t have any news of the other or talked to him and it wasn’t like that didn’t happen before when the other was abroad, but this time Jihoon knew there wouldn’t be any news or calls at all, ever again.

All those thoughts kept him up at night and that turned into a ‘zombie look’ every morning that only coffee could fix, a fact that he kept hiding from Soonyoung. He didn’t want the other to know he was returning to his caffeine addiction. But on the other hand, he was glad he had a busy schedule at day, he would die from overthinking if he didn’t, so he focused on practicing some songs to celebrate Mr. Kim’s birthday on the coming days.

But what he wasn’t expecting to happen was to see Seungcheol when he was about to eat his spoon of rice at the community center. He was so startled he didn’t know what to do, he wasn’t prepare to meet the other like that, so he ignored him the best he could even when his eyes were dying to catch a glimpse of him.

He sent a message to Soonyoung telling him the news only to find out the other was the one that told Seungcheol about his whereabouts and he wanted to shout at him. He had told him not to tell the other about it and yet his friend had done the contrary without warning him beforehand.

At one point he felt like he was suffocating from trying to stay away from the other and that was when his mother told him he looked tense and that he should go to the beach to relax. And she was right, sitting on the sand, with the sound of the waves and the sea breeze was really helping him. But he should have known Seungcheol wouldn’t gave up that easily and suddenly he was there, calling his name with that voice Jihoon liked so much.

But the ache in Jihoon’s chest just allowed him to answer in a bitter tone. And he almost felt his heart stopping when Seungcheol said he had broken up his engagement. There had been a smile almost forming on his face when he noticed Seungcheol’s expression, after all, he had been with Yoon Jeonghan even longer than he had been with Mingyu. And just by the mention of Mingyu and their fallen relationship all Jihoon’s insecurities started overflowing from his mouth and before he realized, he had thrown all of them to Seungcheol.

And after saying all that, he just wanted to know if Seungcheol was willing to accept the reality that was to be with Lee Jihoon, not only to meet occasionally, but to deal with his everyday bad habits that were so distant from the life of a corporate heir. He had told Mingyu that even if Seungcheol didn’t want to be with him he would be okay, but still he was so scared to look as he waited for his answer.

“…but is that the everyday reality that you want?” He had asked hugging his legs tightly.

Jihoon felt and heard Seungcheol moving from his seating place beside him and he started shaking nervously with his heart knowing what answer he wanted to hear.

“Yes. I want that reality.” Seungcheol said with a secure voice and Jihoon felt his heart exploding in excitement “A reality with a Jihoon who hates formal parties, who would fall asleep if I talk about the finance section of my projects, who doesn’t want me to take pictures of him, who would ignore me for hours if he gets inspired with a song and yet,” Jihoon looked up only to see Seungcheol’s sincere gaze on him as he grabbed his hands “he is the same Jihoon that every time we go to eat will buy a lot of meat just for me, who convinced his friend to accept my younger brother in his dance studio, who makes time to give me singing lessons and listen to my problems.” Seungcheol said with a bright smile.

Jihoon turned speechless, because he wasn’t expecting Seungcheol’s answer to be that direct and with all those reasons behind it. His heart was beating fast and loudly and it felt like there a war between his feelings and his thoughts, but with a trembling voice his thoughts were voiced out first.

“You know things are more complicated than that.”

Jihoon knew he sounded skeptical though Seungcheol looked so sure about wanting to be with him. He also wished he could answer with the same certainty, but he was scared. His only boyfriend had been Mingyu and their relationship had developed in the intimacy of their cohabitation, while with Seungcheol things seemed to be out in the open for everyone to see even before they started.

“I know, but I don’t want that to stop us from trying.” Seungcheol said giving a soft peck to Jihoon’s hands.

He liked the feeling of Seungcheol’s hands in his; they gave him strength to voice out his feelings. Because Jihoon was sure he didn’t want to let go of the feelings he had developed for the other. Because he trusted Seungcheol and they deserved to try it. But maybe he took too long to answer, because the other moved to sit beside him again with a deep sigh.

“I know you still have some doubts, but please don’t ask me to stay away from you or forget about everything between us like in your song.”

Jihoon’s eyes opened in surprise and Seungcheol bit his lower lip and turned to look to the other side, like realizing he wasn’t supposed to mention that.

“Kwon Soonyoung sent me your song…” Seungcheol said with a guilty tone, now looking down to their connected hands.

Jihoon was so ready to kill Soonyoung.

They stayed in silence for a moment after that and Jihoon took his time to look at the other. His hair moved slowly with the breeze and his puppy eyes gave back furtive looks like expecting Jihoon to say something; and Jihoon couldn’t help but smile. He wanted his reality to include Seungcheol.

“You know…the song I sent Soonyoung wasn’t complete.”

Seungcheol turned to look at him confused and Jihoon took out his phone from his pant pocket. Jihoon took a deep breath before pressing play. They listened to the song in silence, but he could hear Seungcheol sigh when the part about forgetting everything came.

_“My heart won't bear it if you don't let me go._

_Let me go_

_Forget everything you know, don't expect me to miss you._

_And erase each lyric even if it's your song.”_

But the other almost jumped in excitement when the last verse started.

_“Stay here with me_

_Allow your eyes to steal my breath_

_Force your mouth to never be far away from mine_

_And although in the end I don't have all the answers_

_My heart won't bear it if you let go”_

Jihoon looked at the other’s eyes and mouthed the last words.

“_Stay here with me”_

Seungcheol gave him the biggest smile he had seen on the other and suddenly Jihoon’s back was touching the sand with Seungcheol hugging him tightly.

“Seungcheol” He said softly feeling the other’s weight crushing him.

The other pushed himself up with his arms but remained on top of Jihoon. And then he stayed in silence just looking at him, making Jihoon feel embarrassed.

“What?” Jihoon asked knowing he was blushing.

“You said you want my mouth close to yours.” Seungcheol said with a cheeky smile.

Jihoon frowned and was about to push him away, when he felt Seungcheol’s lips on top of his and he let himself smile in the kiss.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The lyrics are the English translation of the song "Dejame ir" by Andres Cepeda and Morat. The lyrics in Spanish are the following:
> 
> “Mi corazón no va aguantar si no me sueltas  
Déjame ir
> 
> Olvídate de todo lo que sabes  
No vayas a esperar que yo te extrañe  
Y borra cada letra aunque sea tu canción
> 
> Quédate aquí  
Permítele a tus ojos robarme el aliento  
Obliga a tu boca a que ya nunca esté lejos  
Y aunque al final no tenga todas las respuestas  
Mi corazón no va aguantar si tú lo sueltas  
Quédate aquí”


	27. Chapte 27

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is first in Jeonghan's POV and then Mingyu's POV

He entered the bathroom and looked at his reflection in the mirror.

“This is not Yoon Jeonghan, heir of Yoon Hotels…who’s this Yoon Jeonghan?” He asked himself looking at his reflection before washing his face.

He could remember Jisoo saying he was sure Jeonghan would become a great general manager for Yoon Hotels and how Seungcheol was so sure he didn’t want to be general manager of Choi Company.

Jeonghan wondered if he even knew what he wanted to be.

It’s not like he hated his job or the idea of becoming the general manager, but after all this time it felt like he had sacrificed too much for a plan that was imposed on him since he was little. He had worked really hard to prove himself worthy, but he had lost the passion for his work long time ago.

But maybe it was time to regain that passion, after all he was about to become general manager and finally he would be able to push his ideas through without so much resistance. When he was in university he had traveled to Europe with Seungcheol and even when they had stayed at a fancy hotel, Jeonghan thought the idea of backpacking was fascinating and he wished he could open a hostel for that kind of travelers with a touch of Korean culture. He decided to stay positive with those thoughts instead of thinking of the real situation and the chaos he had made in Korea by leaving without notice.

He took a bath and went to a near café to drink and eat something after days of drinking alcohol. He still looked like a walking dead so he tried to cover his face with sunglasses and a hat. He sat near the window and looked at the people passing by. Los Angeles was a nice place, but it seemed that every time he visited he ended up heartbroken.

Jeonghan looked down at his arm, where Jisoo’s phone number once was and sighed. They didn’t talk enough to know more information about how to find the other again and Jeonghan was starting to regret leaving in such a rush. He wanted to see Jisoo, he had wanted to see the other for years and now even when he knew the other had completely moved on and his heart hurt, he didn’t want to have more regrets. He wanted to talk to Jisoo, the other had had a hard time after they departed, but now seemed to be enjoying his life; and Jeonghan wanted to tell him that it was okay, that he accepted his apology and that he was okay too, or at least he would be.

He felt his eyes starting to water with only thinking about that, so he grabbed his phone and decided to finally answer some of the messages he had received, he knew it was 1am or so in Seoul, but maybe it was the best time to avoid questions. He sent a message to Minhyuk, he had received a lot of calls and messages from him. His childhood friend seemed really worried and had probably threatened Seungcheol at least once after knowing they had broken up. Then he texted his mother, he felt sorry that he had avoided her for so many days, but he knew that as soon as she read his message, his father would make others track his location. Finally he took some pictures with his camera and sent them to Chan telling him he was okay and he would be back soon.

Jeonghan returned to the apartment after a couple of hours of staying at the café and when he opened the front door, he was faced with his alcohol-induced past actions. Before going out for breakfast he had focused on getting ready without looking around, but now he looked at the horrible state of the place. But since he had more strength after some food, he started collecting the empty bottles, cleaning the tables and the floor and making the bed. He had done all that only once in his life, when he was taking a hotel management course with Jisoo and they had to learn that in order to know the proper way to arrange a hotel room.

He actually enjoyed cleaning, feeling like he was starting anew after falling deeply in despair. He wasn’t sure how long he had been cleaning when his phone rang. He shuddered before reading the new arrived message only to find a picture of Chan’s smiling face. He smiled looking at it and as if no time had passed he asked the other about school and how he was doing. Chan answered excitedly saying he was getting ready for school and about how he was enjoying his dance lessons. Jeonghan sat on the bed looking at the variety of pictures the other started sending him and smiled even more, Chan would always be a source of happiness for him, since the day Seungcheol introduced to him years ago.

He was about to chastise the other to hurry up and go to school when Chan mentioned that he wished his older brother introduced him to Vernon, a rapper that was now all over the radio after his collaboration with Boo Seungkwan. Jeonghan remembered Seungcheol talking about covering the collaboration in the Choi Company magazine, but the word that stuck in his mind was ‘radio’. 

When he had met Jisoo at the beach festival the other had been previously on stage thanking a radio station and the chances that the other worked in it were pretty high. So after sending a ‘fighting’ message to Chan he started searching for the radio station that sponsored the beach festival. At their web page he found Jisoo was hosting one of their shows and he felt his hope returning.

Jisoo’s show ended up at 8pm, so he ate his lunch and walked around buying cheap souvenirs, something he hadn’t done before. He was used to buying expensive gifts from stores, but he didn’t want to use his card, it would be even easier to track him with that. And he actually liked the keychain, cup and fridge magnet he bought. He even bought a couple of postcards and wrote about his feelings and his hopes on them.

When nighttime arrived, he took a cab to Jisoo’s workplace and waited at the entrance. He had received new messages from his mother and Minhyuk through the day, but he hadn’t answered. And instead he waited, listening to Jisoo’s soothing voice presenting the last song of his show and saying goodbye. About 20 minutes after that, he saw the other leaving the building and as soon as he noticed Jeonghan he gave him a gentle smile.

“Hi, Jeonghan.” The other called him softly waving his hand.

“Hi Jisoo, can we talk?” Jeonghan asked nervously.

“Sure.”

And with just that word Jeonghan felt relief washing all over him.

“But…” Jeonghan looked at him worriedly. “Well, actually a few months ago my bandmates decided to make a reunion and we have been playing sporadically at some clubs. Can we talk in the way there?” Jisoo said pointing to a car.

Jeonghan nodded. He was not expecting for things to go like that, but at this point just anything about Jisoo’s actual life was a mystery to him. And he had thought talking to Jisoo during a car ride would be awkward, but it actually helped him express things that would have been difficult to say with the other’s eyes on him.

They talked again about the last time they saw each other at that club backstage and their feelings about it. Jisoo apologized again and Jeonghan felt like he didn’t deserve it, he had been at fault too and pushed the other too much and he said so. Jisoo had talked about his wife and Jeonghan barely mentioned Seungcheol, but somehow it felt good to talk to the other about those missing years. And just before they got down from the car Jisoo showed Jeonghan the picture of his son. It was a beautiful baby that had Jisoo’s eyes.

They entered the club and Jeonghan stayed at the bar waiting for Jisoo’s band to play and when they were finally on stage Jeonghan let himself smile. The club was definitely better than the one Jisoo used to play and his band’s music was different, but he looked so happy playing his guitar, just like the first time Jeonghan had seen him in Seoul.

“Here is my number, contact me if you want to see L.A as a local.” Jisoo had said with a smile after taking Jeonghan back to his apartment.

And even when their meeting had been fine, Jeonghan had a hard time calling the other. There was still something clutching his heart every time he saw Jisoo, but he knew he had to overcome that fear so he could return to Seoul with no regrets. So he called and Jisoo made sure he went to many interesting local stores and restaurants, and he even showed him his childhood home. They talked about many things, some memories, updates on people they met when they were teenagers and future plans, Jisoo encouraging him, telling him he had always been sure he would be a great general manager. And just like that, Jeonghan stayed three more days, his returning airplane ticket already bought since the moment Jisoo accepted his phone call.

“Have a safe flight. If you ever decide to come back to L.A, you know that you have a friend here.” Jisoo said with a smile.

Jeonghan gave him small smile back. “If you ever go to Korea, I’ll give you and your family a suite in any of our hotels”

“I want the presidential suite.” Jisoo chuckled. 

Jeonghan managed to give him a big smile this time and Jisoo chuckled again.

Jisoo looked at him fondly as he waved his hand. “Goodbye Jeonghan.”

He waved back. “Goodbye Jisoo.”

He turned around to go, but before he entered the passengers’ area, he gave one last look at Jisoo with a small smile. Because maybe that was the goodbye they deserved. The goodbye his heart had been craving for.

###################################################################################

“Mingyu.”

He turned around surprised by his manager voice.

“I still think you should have taken a break before returning to work”

Mingyu looked at the other with a tired expression.

“No hyung, I need to be busy or my mind will fill with useless thoughts.”

His manager just nodded slightly before opening the door of the photography studio. Mingyu had accepted every project appointed to him as soon as he arrived to Europe and even when he knew his manager had been working really hard too, he didn’t want to stop for now.

He had actually thought about taking a couple of weeks in order to accommodate his new apartment, but since he completely focused on it, it turned to be just a couple of days. And after that he just felt empty. Mingyu had left almost everything that reminded him of Jihoon in Seoul, and he only took some clothes that the other had bought for him.

But there was something he had been having trouble deciding to throw or to keep. It was a picture of himself that Jihoon had taken when they were in university. Back then Mingyu had been sick, was having a hard time with his classes and was looking out for a new part-time job because he was fired from his previous one. And that day he had woken up late, barely registering that Jihoon had grabbed his instant camera and had taken the picture. But when he went to buy coffee to start his day, the picture fell from his wallet. He looked horrible with his ‘I just woke up’ look; messy hair, unwashed face and wrinkled pajama. But underneath the picture with Jihoon’s messy handwriting it said “Fighting Mingu”.

He never told the other that that had been the beginning of all. And after that they never mentioned the picture again, but Mingyu always carried it in his wallet, and looked at it before every casting. Because many people during his life had told him he looked handsome, but Jihoon was the only one that always praised his hard work over his looks. Jihoon had always supported his work just like he had supported the other’s career and that was why Mingyu thought they would be always together.

So he really hated the way they had broken up. He wanted to believe that if things had ended before he moved to Korea, at least they could have tried to keep their friendship, but now he couldn't stop thinking about Jihoon lying and hiding things from him.

He took the picture out of his wallet and looked at it. No matter how many times he looked at it, he still looked horrible and yet, he couldn’t help but smile. University days were so far away from the life he had created for himself, however, now he missed them. Even when he really liked his actual life where he was able to buy the things he wanted and meet the important designers, models and photographers he admired, along the way he had lost many friends and now the only constant person in his life was gone too.

“Mingyu, it’s your turn.” His manager said patting his shoulder.

Mingyu looked back at him surprised. He had barely realized when he had his wardrobe change or his got his makeup done.

“Focus, Mingyu, focus.” He said softly as he looked at his reflection in the mirror. He had worked really hard during the last years and now he had finally gotten a long-term contract in Europe. So he walked towards the photographer with a smile on his face.

A couple of hours later he was returning to his apartment when his phone rang.

“Hey” Minghao said as soon as Mingyu picked up the phone. “I just arrived to Korea only to find out that Jun and you are not going to be in the next issue of Choi Magazine.”

“Yeah…I got a three year contract and moved to Europe.” Mingyu said closing his eyes as he put his head on the car headrest.

“Congratulations, but….you don’t seem excited.” The other said.

“I…broke up with Jihoon.” Mingyu said tiredly. His manager knew the entire story as he was the one that received Mingyu in his apartment the day he fought with Jihoon.

“Oh…did you two talk about it?” His friend asked softly.

“Yeah…he chose somebody else.” He frowned.

The other stayed quiet for a moment before talking again.

“Then choose yourself Mingyu, before anything else choose yourself.” Minghao said and Mingyu felt his words like a warm hug.

Minghao was right; he needed to start choosing himself. He had been overworking himself and overthinking about the past, trying to run away from what happened and from all the knowing stares the other models were giving him. He had avoided the topic with his parents, only telling them about his new job and relationship status, and had dismissed his manager’s warm words; but Minghao had a thing with words or maybe it was just the way he said them. Nonetheless, Mingyu had decided he had to focus on his new possibilities and chances to be happy again, as he wasn’t about to quit on his dreams just because Jihoon was no longer by his side.

“Thanks Minghao.” He said with a small smile on his face.

“I’m going to be your special photographer for the Paris Fashion Week, so you better be in your best condition by then.” The other said with a serious voice, but Mingyu knew better.

“Yeah, yeah, no more drinking before the main event.” He said with a light chuckle and he heard his manager clearing his throat. “My manager here won’t let that mistake happen again, after all it was Changkyun-hyung’s fault, cause he wanted to do a pre-celebration.”

He heard Minghao giggle and after that a voice calling the photographer in the background.

“I gotta go now, but remember to call if you need to talk.”

He agreed and said goodbye before turning to look at his manager.

“Hyung, I think we should go over my schedule again, maybe take a break for some days.”


	28. Chapter 28

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a special chapter in Wonwoo's POV

During the four years he had been Mr. Choi’s assistant, Wonwoo had been witness of the changes in his boss’ life. When he was first appointed as assistant he already knew Choi Seungcheol was dating Yoon Jeonghan. He had been there to supervise the major event that was their engagement in one of the Yoon Hotels and he had been expecting to do the same with their wedding. But with time things changed gradually and after a couple of wedding dates postponements, he was even surer about his assumptions. What had started with almost everyday requests from his boss about restaurant reservations and pick-ups from a certain Yoon Hotel to go to work, had transformed into zero requests when it involved his personal relationship with the heir of Yoon Hotels and he only addressed the other for working matters. Yoon Jeonghan had also stopped his random visits at Choi Company and made appointments with his boss in which he brought his own assistant.

His boss didn’t really show if this change was affecting him as he was always professional when it came to work, so Wonwoo was really surprised to see him spacing out in the office after his return from Busan. From what he knew, Mr. Choi had stayed with his grandmother that was really healthy for her age and Yoon Jeonghan had been in Jeju Island, so even with the big event coming up, there was no reason for his boss to be that lost in his thoughts.

It was not his place to ask personal questions to his boss, but he didn’t have to when at the opening party of the new Yoon Hotel he saw the intense stare his boss gave to a particular guest. He was even prompted to approach the other and when he was introduced as Kim Mingyu’s boyfriend, Wonwoo sensed the troubles approaching. But as his job required, he kept everything he saw or heard in secret, just like when he saw them talking in the balcony, closer than a couple of strangers would stand.

And then the collaboration meeting happened, and Wonwoo kept his emotionless expression even when he saw them introducing each other as if they had never met before and even when his boss followed the other into one of the music studios.

In addition to his boss new habit of smiling at his phone when he received a message, Wonwoo also noticed how the other had started gaining some weight during the months that followed their visit to the music company. And then the rumors started.

From his line of work he met different kind of people, between musicians, models and other people in the entertainment and event management field, and at least one of them was bound to see his boss hanging out with Lee Jihoon. That was the name Mr. Choi had let slip from his lips one time, when until that point Wonwoo had only known the other as Lee Woozi. 

The information he had been able to get was that his boss met the producer at his music studio or at a restaurant, and just to be safe he found out that they never visited each other’s houses. He kept all that information to himself as his boss never mentioned anything about the subject, but Wonwoo wanted to know just in case the heir of Yoon Hotels started asking questions. But he never did, and even when the months (in which his boss seemed to be deliberating about the nature of his relationship with Lee Jihoon) passed, Yoon Jeonghan never approached the Choi Company or called him out about it.

And even when at the beginning Wonwoo had also been a bit confused about what his boss was looking for in Lee Jihoon, he knew the other had taken a decision when he persisted in talking to his then still fiancé. There were so many things at stake and maybe that was the reason his boss had taken so long to decide, but Wonwoo wasn’t expecting the breakup to end up in such a downfall.

The disappearance of Yoon Jeonghan, the owners of Yoon Hotels making a scandal at Choi Company, the cancelation of the contract, the despair of the team about that, and mostly the breakdown of his boss at the words of his own father. Wonwoo hadn’t meant to listen to it, but he had heard the harsh words of the general manager of Choi Company towards his son and that made him work even harder to keep the team and his boss from collapsing, after all they had one last event for Yoon Hotels.

And it’s not like he completely blamed his boss for what happened, but he guessed the other could have handled things better before they exploded. And yet, he admired the other’s courage to fight it all and keep his head high even when he received all the blame and also because he pursued with conviction the choice he took. That was why Wonwoo decided to help him, because he had found out Kim Mingyu had moved to Europe after breaking up with Lee Jihoon, but before he could give that detail to his boss the other had ran away.

But maybe the other didn’t need it, as he suddenly informed Wonwoo he would be staying in Busan for a few days and at his return he looked happier than he had seeing him in a while. And to Wonwoo’s expectation, behind it the reason was Lee Jihoon. Because as much as his boss tried to hide it, just like in the last couple of months, a few random words or actions showed how much Mr. Choi thought about the music producer on an average day.

Wonwoo never talked about everything that happened with his boss, but at some point he knew the other knew he was well aware of the entire situation and let himself be more relaxed when it came to his relationship with Lee Jihoon, as if knowing Wonwoo would be there to support him. And maybe he was right, because Mr. Choi had been there for him too in his dark moments.

Mr. Choi had seen the potential in him as an intern, even when he was usually teased for his serious face and non-expressive speech by the others. And when things got difficult with any client, Mr. Choi was always ready to fight for his team. Wonwoo had been given permission to leave early if he got personal issues to deal with and got many extras in his vacations trips, all of that next to his boss always thanking him for his hard work. Mr. Choi had also tried to matchmake him with a few people that he thought Wonwoo would like, and he didn’t want to be rude, but that wasn’t the most comfortable situation to start a relationship. However, he was still thankful to his boss, and it was a plus to have him happier and working even harder to compensate what his breakup with Yoon Jeonghan had left.

Because in the last year their team had struggled to get a new big contract with another hotel, his boss had been constantly clashing with his father, rumors about the failed Choi-Yoon engagement and Mr. Choi’s new boyfriend where everywhere; but even with all that, the smile on his boss face bloomed every time Lee Jihoon called.

And it’s not like they hid their relationship, but they didn’t show it off either. If Wonwoo wasn’t Mr. Choi’s assistant he wouldn’t know much about his boss relationship just like most of the workers in Choi Company. His boss didn’t ask him to make dinner reservations at fancy places, but many had seen the couple eating in small restaurants that people wouldn’t expect a corporate heir to eat in. And even if his boss always left the office at normal hours, Wonwoo knew if the other was going to see Lee Jihoon after work only by seeing his expression as he said goodbye.

But there was something still intriguing him. Yoon Jeonghan had unexpectedly appeared two weeks after the Yoons’ outburst at Choi Company, but Mr. Choi didn’t seem especially shocked with the news, because at one point he stopped his desperate search of the other as if he knew about his prompt return. But also since then he never mentioned Yoon Jeonghan again, and if they met at any event they only greeted each other politely before taking their separate ways. However, things seemed to be going well for Yoon Jeonghan too, as he had announced the launching of a new branch of Yoon Hotels outside the capital and with a different target market.

“Wonwoo.” His name was suddenly called by no other than Kwon Soonyoung. “Are you going to eat that?” He asked eyeing the meat in the grill with a hopeful expression.

The other’s question returned Wonwoo to the present moment where he was eating dinner with the dancer.

He didn’t know how this sort of friendship with Kwon Soonyoung started. He first met the other when he had been practically forced by the models to go to a club and one of them introduced him to the dancer. Only a month later he found out the other was friends with Lee Jihoon. And the way he found out about it had been in a really awkward situation. Kwon Soonyoung had pestered him all morning with messages about eating lunch together and when they finally got a table, it was coincidentally next to his boss and his boyfriend. They had been all really shocked, but with Soonyoung’s rambling things became a bit more normal. That was until Mr. Choi asked him if he was dating Soonyoung and Wonwoo choked with his food. The dancer had laughed out loud and had winked before saying Wonwoo was obviously crushing on him, but he was hard to get. Wonwoo had glared at him until the end of the lunch, wondering again why he had accepted to give his phone number to the other in the first place.

But in all Wonwoo was enjoying the last few months now that things seemed to be calmer. He just hoped that Mr. Choi didn’t take another groundbreaking decision in a while. So he took a deep breath finally letting his thoughts settle as he grabbed his chopsticks ready to eat.

“So…are you going to eat that or not?” 


	29. Chapter 29

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter returns to Seungcheol and then Jihoon's POV

Seungcheol saw the other walking towards him and opened his arms expecting the hug he knew he would receive.

“Hyung! Did you like it?!” Chan asked excitedly as soon as they separated.

Seungcheol nodded with a bright smile on his face and gave his younger brother another hug. He had practically run out of the office to arrive on time to Chan’s end of the year dance recital, but luckily he had made it on time. He knew the other had been practicing really hard for the recital and Seungcheol had been glad to see Chan’s mother among the audience.

“Do you want to go eat something?” He asked patting Chan’s head.

“Yeah! But first….” Chan said looking behind Seungcheol’s shoulder.

He turned around only to see Jeonghan’s smiling face.

“Jeonghan hyung! You made it!” Chan shouted, running to hug the other.

“Channie! Congratulations, you were great.” Jeonghan said giving him a light hug.

Seungcheol looked at them as they kept talking about the recital, but when his gaze found Jeonghan’s, the other gave him a nod with a small smile and he responded in the same way.

It had been awkward to meet Jeonghan after he returned from L.A. After the call they had when Jeonghan was still abroad, they never had another phone call, but Jeonghan had suddenly appeared at their shared apartment to take his things out. They barely talked, but Jeonghan gave him one last hug along with some words that made Seungcheol’s heart feel less heavy when the other left.

“I’m okay, I…made things right this time…and from now on I’m going to follow my own plans.”

That was the last time they shared a personal conversation and Seungcheol regretted that their years-long friendship had ended like that; but he could understand that Jeonghan needed his space and that he wanted to focus on himself and Seungcheol just wanted the other to be more than okay.

Because with time things in Choi Company and Yoon Hotels had calmed down, but the rumors took a long time to settle down. And if the Chois and Yoons happened to meet at any event, the elders blatantly ignored each other, but Seungcheol couldn’t ignore Jeonghan and other probably felt the same, as he would greet him every time.

And if Seungcheol thought the culmination of the Choi-Yoon business relationship was the worst thing that their breakup brought, Chan’s anger and confusion was in another level. The younger had grown up knowing about their friendship and had been really happy when they started dating, so he took it as a personal betrayal that Seungcheol had broken up with the other and started dating Jihoon. And it hurt how long it took for Chan to change his annoyed expression every time he talked about Jihoon or if they met.

But now things were better, because the three of them cared for the younger one and at the same time, Chan understood that all his hyungs were happier with their current reality.

“Bye, Jeonghan hyung!” Chan said waving his hand as he walked back to Seungcheol’s side. “Let’s go hyung. I want to eat some meat.”

“Okay Chan, but first we have to pick up Jihoon. He had a last minute recording so he couldn’t come, but he is surely proud of you and will ask Soonyoung-ssi for the recital official video.”

Chan agreed and started walking towards the exit waving goodbye to his friends, but Seungcheol turned back to look at Jeonghan and as he expected the other was looking at the younger with a smile.

“Bye Jeonghan. Happy holidays.” He said tenderly and Jeonghan smiled returning the greeting.

They both knew the chances of meeting soon were scarce and Seungcheol was sure he was not invited to the Yoon Hotels’ end of the year party.

************************************************************************************

Jihoon sat at the coffee shop waiting for Soonyoung’s arrival. He had been able to finish his meeting with Bumzu earlier than he thought and he wanted to drink a few cups of coffee before his friend would say anything about it.

He sat there drinking and checking his recording schedule before the end of the year holidays, when he heard a soft voice behind him.

“Mingyu, my manager will be arriving soon, but see you at the party.”

He turned around only to see Mingyu smiling to a person Jihoon was sure was another model. He saw the other person leaving the coffee shop followed by the stares and whispers of many of the other customers, but when he looked at Mingyu once more, he noticed the other had a fond expression on his face.

He took a deep breath before calling the other by his name. Mingyu turned to look back at him with a shocked expression, but didn’t move or said a word.

It had been more than half a year since the last time they saw each other or talked, but seeing him in person made Jihoon’s heart ache in some way. Mingyu hadn’t change much, except his hair color, but Jihoon could feel a sort of anguish that was never there between them before. Maybe it was the longing for the friendship they had built when they were there for each other in their worst and best moments.

“You can sit down if you want.” Jihoon said softly, a bit scared of the other’s rejection.

Mingyu bit his lower lip before nodding softly and walking to sit in front of Jihoon.

“So….you are back…” Jihoon started, not sure of what to say.

“Yes, I came back for vacations and my parents came from Japan too.” Mingyu replied without looking at him directly.

“So….How’s Europe? Are things going well in the modeling world?” Jihoon wanted to slap himself. He sounded so awkward and Mingyu seemed even more uncomfortable.

“Yeah….” The other said and sighed. “Jihoon, I’m fine, really.”Mingyu finished with a small smile.

“So…” Jihoon wanted to stop the awkwardness and the only way he knew to do that with Mingyu was to tease him. “Are you dating that model?” He asked with a smirk.

“Wha-at?! No-o…” Mingyu replied bumbling.

“But you like him…” Jihoon continued with a teasing voice. “I know you, Mingyu.”

He saw the other’s blushing face turning into a serious expression as he said those last words. And the silence after that stretched longer than Jihoon expected.

“Are you happy Jihoon?”

He looked at the other startled by the sudden question before giving him a smile.

“I am happy, but I would be happier to know that you are happy too.” He replied touching the model’s hand softly.

“I am happy…and… I do like him” The other finally said with a low chuckle.

Jihoon’s smile grew even more before punching the other’s arm softly. “I knew it!”

“I’ll be returning to Europe in a week, do you want to go eat something with Soonyoung one of these days?” Mingyu asked smiling.

“No need to call me, I’m here!” Soonyoung’s loud voice boomed through the coffee shop as he pulled a chair to seat between the two of them.

“Kim Mingyu, welcome to Korea~” Soonyoung said in a butchered French.

“Hi Soonyoung…and no, I don’t have a souvenir for you.” The tallest chuckled again noticing the other’s pout at his words.

Jihoon laughed at their bickering remembering the first time they met and Mingyu had been jealous of Soonyoung. Many years had passed since then and even when he knew things would never be the same, he was still thankful that he got to know the tallest one and that the other was wishing for him to be happy.


	30. Chapter 30

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is also in Seungcheol and then Jihoon's POV

Seungcheol left the kitchen with a bowl of popcorn in one hand and two cans of cola in the other. As he entered the living room he found an excited Jihoon pointing at the TV. In there he could see Seungkwan posing for the pictures in the red carpet of the end of the year awards. Jihoon was nominated along Bumzu for best producer, but even when both of them were invited, Jihoon preferred to watch the awards at his apartment with his pajamas and eating in his sofa.

“Jihoon, here.” Seungcheol said giving the other his cola and sitting beside him.

Jihoon would never admit it out loud, but he liked to cuddle, so as soon as Seungcheol sat comfortably on the sofa, the other was right by his side putting his head on his shoulder.

“Vernon is going to arrive late, so he won’t be at the red carpet. You should have seen Seungkwan’s annoyed expression because he wanted to go with him.” Jihoon said before grabbing some popcorn from the bowl.

Seungcheol chuckled completely imagining the singer’s expression before giving a light kiss to the top of Jihoon’s head. The other turned around to glare at him, but Seungcheol knew he wasn’t really angry, so he just gave him a big smile. Jihoon pouted before turning to look at the TV again and Seungcheol felt his soul soaring. Moments like this, where he was able to show how much he felt for the other, were the moments he had wished since he accepted his feelings for Jihoon.

It hadn’t been easy and many things were still yet to be solved, like his father’s acceptance, but Seungcheol wasn’t going to let his father mess with his love life; they had enough arguments about the company. With his friends it had been easier, but not before going through many awkward moments where Jeonghan’s name was mentioned. Of course Minhyuk had sided up with Jeonghan, and Hyunwoo ended there by default because he was his boyfriend. But through it all Hoseok had been by side telling him that, yeah he was crazy and that he needed yet another drink to understand it all, but that Seungcheol should know he would support him no matter what.

And things had been more positive in Busan, at least coming from Seungcheol’s grandmother. She was already fond of Mrs. Lee and had heard stories about Jihoon even before meeting the other, so she was more than excited to know they had started dating. On the other hand, Jihoon’s parents hadn’t been as excited. Just like Jihoon, they cared very deeply for Kim Mingyu as they had met the other as Jihoon’s friend back in university and then as his boyfriend. And even if they were accepting and invited him for dinner while he was still in Busan, Seungcheol could see that they were still worried about Jihoon’s boyfriend change. But now things were better, they were even going to spend the New Year celebration in Busan visiting the Lees and his grandmother along with Chan.

Seungcheol suddenly felt Jihoon moving as he stood up to go to the bathroom and in his solitude he looked around the living room. Jihoon had moved to this apartment about a month later after Seungcheol went to search for the other in Busan. It was farther away from Choi Company, but closer to Jihoon’s job, so Seungcheol used it as an excuse to pick up Jihoon and then eating dinner together there.

Jihoon’s new apartment was far different from the one he used to live. It had been obviously chosen and decorated by Kim Mingyu, as it was in a very fancy neighborhood and all the furniture was from famous brands. The walls used to be decorated with paintings and pictures that were no longer there by the time Seungcheol first entered the apartment. But now Jihoon’s apartment was in a quiet neighborhood and had many references to anime and music and the most comfortable sofa Seungcheol had ever sat on.

But there was something on the living room’s wall that Jihoon had brought from his old apartment. It was a picture of the neighborhood he used to live in when he was in Japan. Jihoon had been honest with Seungcheol telling him that the picture had been taken by Kim Mingyu; but that he wanted to keep it because it meant too much to him for the years he had lived in Japan with all the things he went through and the friends he made there. Seungcheol felt a bit uncomfortable the first few times he saw it when he visited, but he knew he should accept it, because after all, he was still living in the same apartment he once shared with Jeonghan, although now he spent most of his nights at Jihoon’s.

“We should visit there someday.” Jihoon’s voice startled him and he turned to look at the other.

Jihoon had a soft smile on his face as he looked at the picture. “Baekho-hyung told me that my favorite ramen restaurant is still in that street.”

Seungcheol beamed at the idea of traveling to Japan with Jihoon. And that is when he realized a fact they had never talked about.

“You had lived there for so long, but I had never heard you speak Japanese.” He said pulling Jihoon to sit next to him again.

“Well…if you haven’t notice, Korean is the most useful language in Korea.” Jihoon said smirking.

Seungcheol pout changed into a smirk before getting closer to the other and whispering to his ear. “I bet you sound hot speaking Japanese.”

He could feel the sudden warm in Jihoon’s cheeks before the other pinched his stomach and he yelped.

“Jihoonie!”

Jihoon just chuckle and returned to look at the TV.

“The ceremony is already starting… Actually, it’s the first Korean end of the year award I watch in like a decade. When I was in Japan, with the other producers, choreographers and vocal trainers we used to go to eat together and watched the Japanese awards in the restaurant.”

Seungcheol just nodded, but as the show passed by he realized that Jihoon was probably used to watch the shows with a different eye than the normal spectator. Watching the ceremony with Jihoon was like having his own music critic there and he was really good at explaining why he liked or disliked a song or performance.

So Seungcheol stayed quiet only looking fondly at the other as he moved his hands according to the rhythm of the songs playing.

*************************************************************************************

Jihoon was taking his time refiling the bowl of popcorn in the kitchen when he heard Seungcheol screaming.

“It won! My song won!”

Jihoon frowned confused and returned rapidly to the living room where the TV showed Seungkwan walking towards the stage to receive the prize for Best OST.

Seungcheol must have noticed his presence and turned to look at him.

“Jihoonie, my song won!” Seungcheol said excitedly standing up.

“Your song?” Jihoon asked with a smug expression.

The song had been an unexpected project given to him after Seungkwan’s album charted really well. The drama was really successful, so it was a win-win situation for all of them.

“Yeah, my song…” Seungcheol said grabbing the popcorn bowl. “Soonyoung told me you said that you wrote the song for me.” He said smiling and returning to sit again.

“I…what? I said what?”

Jihoon stood there frozen trying to recall if he ever said that to Soonyoung. It’s not like he hadn’t gotten inspired by Seungcheol to write the song, and it’s not like Soonyoung didn’t know that fact, but admitting it out loud was another thing.

“Don’t put that face.” Seungcheol said standing up again to grab his hand.

“What face?” Jihoon asked letting the other pull him to the sofa.

“Your ‘I’m going to kill Soonyoung’ face.”

Jihoon couldn’t help but laugh at that as he had probably put that face more times than he could count.

Soonyoung had been his friend since they were in elementary school and they had been through so many things that often involved his ‘I’m going to kill Soonyoung’ face when the other, according to Jihoon, totally deserved it.

But he had to admit Soonyoung was that unconditional friend that had always showed how much he cared for him and even when at the beginning of his relationship with Seungcheol he seemed to be a little overprotective, he eventually sided with Seungcheol and enjoyed embarrassing Jihoon.

They were so close that Jihoon’s parents had been at Soonyoung’s high school graduation when they returned and Jihoon stayed in Japan. And it was Soonyoung who had told Jihoon’s mother about Seungcheol’s trip to Busan to find Jihoon and even showed her a picture of him.

His parents had said they wanted an unbiased perspective, so they had called Soonyoung to ask more about Seungcheol before they invited him for dinner. That had been rather embarrassing, but luckily when they were having dinner there was no mention of that. But there was something Jihoon noticed during that dinner and that he got to discuss with his parents before going to sleep that night.

Kim Mingyu would always be a really important person in Jihoon’s life and his parents knew that. His parents had been really worried when he decided to stay in Japan for university, but when they got to know Mingyu as his roommate, they instantly liked him and every time they visited Japan they would dinner with both of them and they had been really happy when they started dating.

Jihoon had already talked with his mother about everything that happened, but she told him she wished she had seeing Mingyu before the breakup and cooked for him one last time. It was a special feeling the Lees had developed for Kim Mingyu knowing the other wasn’t close to his own parents, so Jihoon knew they were disappointed that things had changed so much. But Jihoon was glad they were accepting of Seungcheol after getting to know him better. He just wished the same happened with Seungcheol’s father.

CEO Choi was a charismatic man just like Seungcheol and if things had been different he would probably be a bit more supportive of their relationship, but after the chaos with the Yoons, the older man blamed it all on Jihoon. That was somewhat tiresome for Jihoon because he didn’t want to create more conflict between Seungcheol and his family, but the other said he shouldn’t worry about that, that it wasn’t his fault. And at least he had gotten Chan to forgive him, the kid had been pretty mad after knowing Seungcheol had decided to start dating him, but with time and by getting to know each other more, things had gotten definitely better.

“I bet you are going to win. I actually bet with Hoseok, because he said I’m biased but I know you are the best nominee.” Seungcheol suddenly said surprising Jihoon.

In the TV they were announcing the nominees for best producer and Jihoon took a deep breath waiting as they opened the envelope.

And he could barely hear his and Bumzu’s name before he was toppled by a hug that was followed by a bunch of kisses on his face.

“Congratulations Jihoon.” Seungcheol finally said before kissing him on the lips and Jihoon stopped caring to listen to Bumzu’s speech as he returned the kiss.

But he could swear not even a minute passed before his phone started ringing. He ignored it and put his arms around Seungcheol’s neck deepening the kiss. But just as the other moved his mouth to kiss his neck, Seungcheol’s phone started ringing. He heard the other sigh, but neither of them moved to pick up.

It was just when Jihoon’s phone rang again that Seungcheol stood up with a frustrated sigh. Jihoon saw him frowning as reached for the phone and saw the caller’s name on the screen. And Jihoon couldn’t help but chuckle when he saw Soonyoung’s smiling face below his name as Seungcheol gave him the phone.

“Congratulations Jihoonie! Your first award in Korea as a producer and well…also for the OST and surely Seungkwan will win some other awards with his new album.”

Jihoon thanked Soonyoung trying not to laugh at Seungcheol’s pouting face, but he knew that if he ignored the other or suddenly cut the call, the other would call again until he answered.

“I’m sure you will invite me a congratulations dinner at that expensive restaurant.” He said and after a few ‘so unfair Jihoonie’, ‘you are the rich producer here’ and ‘you are the one with a rich boyfriend here’, his friend cut the call. And by that moment, Seungcheol had already turned to watch the TV again as some boy group was performing.

And as Jihoon put the phone down, he took his time to look at the other.

‘Boyfriend’…it was a word Jihoon didn’t usually use, preferring to mention the other by his name. 

Choi Seungcheol

His boyfriend

His first kiss

He would have never imagined that the same guy with the puppy eyes and plump lips, and that to Jihoon’s annoyance was still taller than him that he had to stand in his tiptoes to kiss him, would become his boyfriend.

“Cheol.” He called softly making the other turn around.

Jihoon bit his lower lip nervously before speaking.

“Do you want to listen to all the songs I wrote for you before we started dating?”

And Jihoon kissed him before the other broke his face from how wide his smile was.


	31. Chapter 31

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! First, I want to thank you all for being here till the end of this story! Thank you so much for reading, leaving kudos, the bookmarks and specially to Kamoiwoo for such lovely comments :D
> 
> This story will end just like it started, with Seungcheol and then Jihoon’s POV.
> 
> Hope you all enjoy this last chapter!

Seungcheol gave one last hug to his grandmother before returning to his car to pick up Jihoon from his parents’ house. He had had dinner with his grandmother and Chan, after the younger returned from hanging out with the friends he made in the few days they had been in Busan.

This would be the first New Year celebration with Jihoon and he was more than excited for it. He had searched in the web and The Busan Sunrise Festival seemed like a good idea to start the New Year next to Jihoon, so he planned to pick up the other and then drive to the beach. The past days they had visited each other’s families and also had a small celebration in the community center, but he wanted to be alone with Jihoon when the clock would mark midnight.

But maybe it was a really bad idea to go to the most well-known activity of the day as the beach was full of people and Jihoon didn’t seem to appreciate being in the beach with the cold weather. Seungcheol could barely see his face as the other was wearing a beanie and a wide scarf, but his eyes kept looking around at the quantity of people around them.

“Mmmm…Jihoon…If you are uncomfortable we could return to your parents’ house…”

Jihoon shook his head saying no, but suddenly started pulling him farther away from the crowd. And when they entered the car Jihoon started typing on his phone without saying a word. Seungcheol looked at the other confused but didn’t ask, and in a couple of minutes more Jihoon pulled down his scarf and smiled at him.

“Let’s go to this place.” Jihoon said showing him an address in his phone screen.

Seungcheol looked at him still confused, but Jihoon just told him to drive and that he will explain when they arrive there. And ‘there’ was located in a tall, but old building and Seungcheol couldn’t help but chuckle when Jihoon grabbed the door key from under one of the flower pots.

“I always loved the beach view from here.” Jihoon said taking off his scarf and coat as soon as they entered the place.

“Jihoon and where exactly is this?” Seungcheol was even more confused as the place seemed to be a multipurpose area packed with instruments, art easels, some sports jackets and one wall covered with mirrors.

“When I was in school our band didn’t have a place to practice, so we rented this space that we had to share with other students simultaneously. It was rather chaotic, but it was better than nothing. And well, Soonyoung is still friends with the owner, so…here we are.”

Seungcheol gave the other a smile imagining teenage Jihoon playing his piano in the room and without knowing his thoughts Jihoon just smiled back.

“So we will watch the sunrise from here?” He asked instead and Jihoon nodded.

“Here is warm and less crowded.” Jihoon said, sitting in one the chairs.

It was definitely not the romantic setting Seungcheol had been planning in his head when he thought about spending New Year with Jihoon, but as long as he was with the other he was happy. And when he was happy he loved to tease the other.

“Oww, I loved out there where I was going to hug you all night so you wouldn’t be cold and would protect you from being pushed by other people.” He said giving the other a back hug.

“You can still hug me all night.” Jihoon said softly and Seungcheol chuckled.

“You bet I will. But first let’s find a more comfortable chair, because this one seems like it’s going to break in any minute.”

Jihoon laughed, that special laugh of his, and Seungcheol just pulled him closer and gave him a kiss in the cheek. It was a couple of hours before midnight so they just grabbed the hot beverages Seungcheol had brought with him and talked.

During the last few months their relationship had just gotten stronger than ever after finishing with all the introductions to their close ones and learning to deal with the each other’s’ daily schedule. But during the last few weeks, after attending the last board meeting of the year in Choi Company, Seungcheol had started thinking about an idea that he was ready to talk about with Jihoon. 

Jeonghan had once told him he was not the typical heir and Seungcheol didn’t want to be one. So he had been thinking that maybe he was never meant to be his father successor in Choi Company and that with all the experience he had acquire managing events and other activities he could actually open his own company focusing on more small events but giving them a sort of fancy style. He had been planning on acquiring a place to rent for different kind of events. He had gotten to know many artists in different fields that didn’t get the opportunity to show their talents, because an exhibition place was too expensive.

“What are you thinking about?” Jihoon asked suddenly grabbing his hand.

Seungcheol gave him a light kiss before telling the other all about his plans for the next year. It’s not like he wanted to completely drop from Choi Company, but maybe in the future he would be contented with just managing his own small team for his own company instead of the variety of departments Choi Company had.

“I also know some starting musicians that would love to have a place to sing that is not a cheap bar.” Jihoon said putting his head on his shoulder.

Maybe he was thinking about it all way too superficially, but with Jihoon there letting him know he was supporting him Seungcheol believed that he could take on this new challenge, even when his father would probably turn crazy.

*********************************************************************************************************************************************

“Are you falling asleep?” Seungcheol asked and Jihoon just rubbed his eyes and yawned.

He was used to sleep late, staying sometimes until sunrise composing a song, but since the holidays started he had been eating and sleeping more, and with Seungcheol’s warmth beside him and his soothing voice telling him about all the places they could visit when they go to Daegu in spring, Jihoon felt the need to close his eyes and rest.

“You can sleep, I’ll wake you up when it’s the right time.” The other said softly and Jihoon barely heard him letting sleep take him.

But before he knew it he felt a light pat on his shoulder and Seungcheol’s lips on his forehead.

“Wake up Jihoonie, it’s about time.” He heard the other said, but he just snuggled closer. He wouldn’t admit it, but people close to him knew he liked to cuddle when he was sleepy.

“Jihoon….you are going to miss the sunrise.” Seungcheol said before tickling him softly and Jihoon let himself laugh without opening his eyes.

But he suddenly stopped when he realized it was new day, a new year.

“Was I sleeping when midnight arrived?” Jihoon asked the other with eyes full of panic.

Seungcheol chuckled and nodded caressing his face gently.

“I tried waking you up, but you just grumbled and snuggled closer.”

“No way!....I’m sorry, I just ate too much during dinner.” Jihoon said feeling guilty, but Seungcheol’s smile never faltered.

“It’s okay…” Seungcheol said moving him to face the window. “Happy New Year Jihoon.” He said softly before kissing Jihoon’s forehead.

The sun was rising beautifully in the horizon and for a moment Jihoon felt as if time had stopped. He had spent a decade wanting to see this sunrise again and Seungcheol knew it and had given it to him.

“I love you.” He said softly with a small smile in his face as the rays of the sun entered the room.

He heard Seungcheol’s giggle beside him before the other kissed him.

The kiss was barely a kiss, just like the first one they shared in the Busan Festival the first time they met.

“I love you too.” Seungcheol said with his face barely away from Jihoon’s.

He never thought he would be the first one to say it, but with Seungcheol it seemed easier. It was still a bit embarrassing to say out loud, but it was what he really felt for the other.

“Happy New Year.” Jihoon finally said kissing the other again, loving how the sun made Seungcheol’s face glow.

He didn’t notice how long they had stayed there kissing, but the sun was already up in the sky and from the window they could see the people retiring from the beach festival.

“We should go to the beach later or tomorrow before returning to Seoul.” Seungcheol said noticing how Jihoon had stayed looking outside.

Jihoon nodded and after staying bit longer in the place they decided to go eat some breakfast at Jihoon’s parents place, hoping the others’ wouldn’t mind. And when they arrived Jihoon’s parents were still sleeping probably having stayed late with their friends in the community center.

Seungcheol entered the kitchen, but seemed a bit disoriented of where the different ingredients were, so different from his attitude in Jihoon’s apartment. He had been staying in there more than often and there were days when Jihoon barely kept himself from asking the other to stay.

Seungcheol started humming one of Jihoon’s songs and Jihoon followed him singing softly. From the things the company had planned for him in the upcoming months he knew he would be really busy, and with the plan Seungcheol had in mind, the other’s schedule would probably be packed, so Jihoon just wanted to enjoy the simplicity of this moment. And maybe also tell the other an idea that had been appearing in his mind lately.

“Do you want to move in with me?” He asked standing next to Seungcheol and the other almost dropped the pan he was holding turning to look at him with wide eyes.

“I really like the Jihoon this New Year has brought.” Seungcheol said smirking after a moment of silence.

“Does that mean-.”

“That I will love you even more this year.” Seungcheol said putting the pan down and hugging Jihoon. “That you are as beautiful and even more than the day I saw you at the beach festival back then and that we should probably start hitting the gym if we want to keep eating after midnight.”

Jihoon started laughing thinking of how lucky he was to have met Seungcheol after all those years. That even when their realities had crashed chaotically and the road ahead were still bumpy, he wanted to believe that now that Seungcheol was here things were finally in the right track. Like the waves that were meant to reach the shore, like their teenage dream that was meant to come true, this was their reality and they would love to keep it that way.

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you liked it :D


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